While both men and women are emotional beings, it can, at times, appear as though some men are not. It wouldn’t be right to say that this only applies to men, though, as some women can be just as disconnected.
Nonetheless, when a man comes across in this way, it can show that he is strongly identified with his mind. Operating from here will allow him to experience a fair amount of control over how he feels. Force If a feeling comes up that causes him to feel uncomfortable, he could soon end up pushing it down. Feelings like this could be seen in the same way that a gardener sees weeds, with them needing be removed straight away. The structured and rational part of him, well then deal with the unstructured and irrational part of him. This can be seen as something that will allow him to think straight and not to behave in ways that are destructive. A Strong Reaction If he was to come across someone who is acting emotional, he may end up judging their behaviour. This person can be seen as being weak and lacking what is takes to control themselves. Their criticism may be even more severe if they were to come across another man who acts in this way. This man could be seen as someone who needs to pull themselves together. A Break Up Let’s say that he was to come across a man who is in a lot of pain due to having recently broken up with his partner. This may be a time when he tells the guy that there are plenty of women out there and that he shouldn’t be so upset. According to this man, the key will be for him to simply get his mind straight and, once this takes place, he will no longer be upset. Said another way, his emotions will only be out of control because his mind is out of control. A Simple Process It is then not going to matter if this guy is feeling depressed or even experiences suicidal thoughts, as changing what is going on in his mind will solve everything. What this man may also recommend is that he focuses on other areas of his life. One idea he could put forward is that by lifting heavy weights, it will allow him to ‘get over’ his ex. Physical force, along with mental force, then, is going to be like a magic wand that will get this guy back on track. The Same Approach What this could show is that this man behaves in the same way whenever he has experienced a break up. Embracing how he felt afterwards would most likely have been seen as being a sign of weakness and a complete waste of time. Focusing on his ex and being overwhelmed by how he felt would have stopped him from being able to fulfil his goals. Feeling sad and down may have been seen as a sign of self-pity and thereby, having no benefit to his life. The Power of Focus He is likely to believe that his mind is in control of how he feels, so controlling his thoughts will be is what has allowed him to master his feelings. Not embracing how he feels is then not going to mean that he is repressing how he feels; it is just that he is not getting caught up in how he feels. And, if his mind isn’t right, he might soon end up coming into contact with his negative feelings. It will be as if there are only two options: either he controls his emotions or his emotions control him. The Dominator Model In the same way that nature is often seen as something that needs to be dominated, his emotions will be seen in the same way. Embracing how he feels is then not part of being strong; this can only take place by resisting how he feels. The alternative would be for the man to be able to embrace how he feels, without getting caught up in how he feels. When this happens, he will be containing his emotional experience, neither repressing not venting his emotions. Integration This will enable his mind and his body to work together, which will allow him to operate as a whole human being. What this will allow him to see is that while his thoughts can affect how he feels, what is taking place in his mind can simply trigger the feelings that are already in his body. As a result of this, changing is thoughts or lifting weights, for instance, is not going to deal with his emotions if he is in a lot of pain after a break up. This doesn’t mean that he should languish in self-pity and sit around doing nothing while his life slips away; it means that another approach will be needed. Real Strength One way that he may be able to let go of this pain is by crying it out. This will then be a time when he will surrender to how he feels as opposed to trying to change how he feels through force or willpower. Surrendering to how he feels will be a feminine approach, but it will take great strength to do this. Trying to change how he feels, on the other hand, would be a masculine approach, but this would be a defence that he utilises because he is unable to face how he feels. Awareness Taking all this into account, it would be accurate to say that it takes a lot of inner strength for a man to face how he feels, with this being something that takes a fair amount of presence. Pushing emotions down might be a sign of a strong mind, but this is not the same as being an embodied human being who has presence. If a man hasn’t developed this presence and can only deal with his emotions by avoiding them, he may need to reach out for external support. Through working with a therapist or a healer, for instance, and working through his pain, he will gradually develop the ability to be with how he feels and to feel comfortable enough to reach out when this is not possible.
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Oliver JR Cooper http://www.oliverjrcooper.co.uk
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In recent years, a lot has been said about the amount of people who are committing suicide. This may show that it is more common than before or it may show that this is something that is receiving more exposure than before.
It has also been said that more men commit suicide than women, but that this is only because men are far more likely accomplish this outcome. This is then something that affects both genders. Breaking down the Walls Thanks to the attention that this issue is now getting in the public eye, it is taking away a lot of the stigma. But, in the same way that a house isn’t built overnight, this problem won’t be eradicated overnight either. Still, as a consequence of what has taken place, numerous people out there have benefited from the work that has already been done to encourage people to reach out for support. Along with this, there will be the people who are currently being assisted in this very moment, and those who will be in the future. All Walks of Life When it comes to suicidal thoughts, this is something that just about anyone can experience. In others words, it doesn’t matter how much someone earns, how successful they are or what their background is. So, while it would be easy to assume that this is something that only takes place if someone lives on the street or is down on their luck, for instance, it can take place even if someone lives in a mansion or appears to have it all together. Masters of Disguise Yet, even if someone does have suicidal thoughts, it doesn’t mean that the people in their life will realise. There can what is taking place within them and then there can be what they reveal to other people. Through wearing a mask around others, they could create the impression that everything in their life is going fine. Or it could be clear that something is not right about them, but that could be about as far as it goes. A Massive Difference Naturally, there is a monumental difference between someone feeling a bit down or off, and wanting to end their life. However, although there is a big difference, it can still be possible for someone to cover up what is actually going on for them. The downside to this is that by wearing this mask around others, it is going to be even harder for them to get the assistance that they desperately need. When this takes place, it can show that they are carrying a fair amount of shame. A Prison Through carrying so much shame, they can believe that opening up about what is taking place for them would cause them to be rejected and abandoned. Said another way, they would end up being ostracised. This will show that they are carrying too much shame, which is why their shame is having a negative effect on their life. Someone like this can be then surrounded by people, but they may as well be on an island in the middle of nowhere. The Experience In addition to having suicidal thoughts, someone could also have moments when they feel as though they just want to die. During these moments, it is going to be clear that they will be in a lot of pain. This could be an inner experience that they have throughout the day, or it might be something that comes over them a few times a week, for instance. But, no matter how often they have this experience; it is unlikely that they will be able to simply think their way out of it. The Cause If they were to look back on their life, what they may find is that they only started experiencing life in this way after a certain event in their life. Perhaps they experienced a break up, lost a loved one, or lost their job. Then again, this could be an inner experience that they have had for as long as they can remember. Therefore, they won’t need to experience anything significant in order to have these thoughts and to feel this way; the only thing that they may need to experience is a certain amount of stress. A Deeper Look The reason why someone can carry so much pain as an adult, and want their life to end as a result, can be due to what took place at the beginning of their life. What has taken place in their adult life will then have triggered the pain that was already within them. This could show that one was neglected during their early years, and it could even be a sign that they experienced a lot of pain when they were born. At these stages of their life, they wouldn’t have been able to handle this pain. The Only Option Thus, through not having the ability to handle this pain or having anyone else around to sooth them, they would have wanted their life to end so that they would no longer be in pain. Their system would have been overwhelmed, which would have meant it would have most likely felt as though they would die anyway. The years would then have passed, but they will still be carrying the trauma that they experienced all those years ago. Until this trauma is resolved, it is unlikely that their life will change. Awareness If one can relate to this, and they want to change their life, they will most likely need to reach out for external support. This is something that can be provided by the assistance of a therapist or a healer, for instance.
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Oliver JR Cooper http://www.oliverjrcooper.co.uk
Before someone becomes a prime minister or a president, they will often talk about what they will do to make the country better for the people. And, as this person will be looking to get the top job, so to speak, this could be seen as something that is expected.
The main objective, after all, should be to make sure that the citizens who live in their country are taken care of first. This is not to say that people who live in other countries shouldn’t be given consideration. First Things First However, if the needs of the people who live in others countries were placed above the needs of the people who live in the country, it would show that something isn’t right. This is something that a future prime minister/president will be aware of. If they were to talk about what they are going to do for other countries and overlook the country they are there to represent, they wouldn’t get very far. This is why this won’t be one of the things they focus on. A Different Stance Once they have managed to convince enough people of their suitability for the position that is up for grabs, they may stay true to their word. If they do, their priority will be to do what they can to serve their fellow citizens. Then again, it could soon become clear that their loyalties lie elsewhere. In this case, their main concern can be to do what they can for people from other countries and to disregard their fellow citizen’s needs and concerns. Out of Sight Still, this may be something that is only clear is someone has the inclination to look beyond what the mainstream media tells them. If they were to rely on this source of information to inform them about what is actually going in their country in particular, and the world in general, they may remain in the dark. This source of information is then there to keep people informed, but they are more interested in doing everything they can to keep people uninformed. But, as long as someone believes that this source is there to inform them, it will stop them from causing too many problems A Big Issue For example, before a prime minister/president got into power, they may have waxed lyrical about how they were going to protect the country’s borders. Nonetheless, now that they are in power, they could do the complete opposite So, instead of clamping down on the amount of people who come into the country, they might not have done anything. And, to add insult to inquiry, they may have even signed a certain pact. An Act of Betrayal Due to what is taking place in their country, someone can wonder what is going on and why their prime minister/president is not looking out for the country’s best interests. One way to look at this would be to say that the prime minister/president is just two-faced. Through having a highly developed ability to deceive others, the ability to handle a lot of criticism, and a strong need for attention, it allowed them to gradually rise up to the top. The only thing that this person is going to be interested in, then, will be power, not making a positive difference. Another Reason It could be this simple, but then again, there is the chance that there is far more to it. There is the chance that right from very beginning, this prime minister/president wasn’t there to serve the people. Instead, this person was probably there to serve the interests of a group of people that are not in the public eye. When it comes to what these people want, it is likely to be radically different to what the average person wants. A Positive Spin Yet, while the agenda that these people have for the world won’t be revealed directly to the public, it will be revealed indirectly. The version that they will reveal, via the mainstream media, academia and the government, for instance, will be the sugar coated version. It is then not going to be that these people want a one world government so that they can control every part of someone’s life; no, it is that having a one world government will solve every problem under the sun and lead to heaven on earth. This will then be very enticing proposition as opposed to something that needs to be completely discarded. An Analogy This is then tantamount to someone asking one of their friends if they would like to go swimming with them in crystal clear water, leaving out the fact that the water will be full of sharks. Through leaving this vital pierce of information out, the other person won’t need to be forced; they will happily go along with this idea. One doesn’t need to have a comprehensive understanding of how to manipulate others in order to see that it is easier to do this when another person doesn’t realise what is taking place. If another person does realise what is going on, it is not going to be possible to pull the wool over their eyes. Conclusion To some people, the idea that most of the people in power are simply puppets for the so- called elite is going to sound like a conspiracy theory. But, if someone is willing to question what they are told and has the ability to see patterns, it will most likely become clear that what is taking place in the world is orchestrated. As for a world government, this can sound like a great idea – the whole world working together, no longer fighting. Yet, while the idea is sound, the only way something like this is likely to work is if it is instigated by people who have a certain level of consciousness. Most of the people at the top are likely to be completely out of touch with their essence and, therefore, see themselves as being separate from everything and everyone. Without the right level of mental, emotional and spiritual maturity, they would do more harm than good.
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Oliver JR Cooper http://www.oliverjrcooper.co.uk Critical Thinking: Would Most Religions Die Out If It Wasn't For The Indoctrination Of Children?17/12/2018
There are children who, practically from the moment they were born, were made to support a certain sports team. This is likely to be a team that one of their family members also supports.
Perhaps this family member ended up supporting this team because one of their family members behaved in the same way when they were younger. Still, once a child like this gets the point in their development where they have the ability to think for themselves, it is unlikely that they will end up supporting another team. Fully Absorbed At this point in their life, the team that they support is likely to be seen as part of who they are. Like an arm or a leg for instance, it will be an essential part of them; taking away any thought, let alone need, to do anything about it. It might be hard for this person to imagine that there was a time in their life when they had no loyalty to any one team. This would have been a time in their life when the team that they now support was just another team. Two Levels At this stage of their life, they might be fully committed to this team, with them watching every game that they can. Then again, they might not have this level of commitment, but still feel connected to this team. It will then be a big focus of their life or it will be something that has been put to one side. Either way, it is not going to be something that has been completely cast aside, no longer having any meaning to them. The Exception There is, of course, always the chance that someone like this could lose interest in the team that they have supported since they were a small child. Now that they are an adult, they could come to the conclusion that there are far more important things in life. Or, they could end up finding another team to support. This could be a team that they feel more connected to; perhaps it is a team that is closer to where they live, for instance. A Small Part of Life However, regardless of whether someone is fanatical about their team or not, it is unlikely to be something that will have an effect on how they see the world. It might define how they see supporters from other teams, but what it probably won’t do is define how they see people in general. For example, if they were to go to a game, they could end up seeing the other supporters through a certain lens. Once this is over, they will most likely go back to how they usually see people, with this being filtered through their normal lens. A Different Scenario Another thing that can take place, practically from the moment someone comes into the world, is that their family members can pass on their religious beliefs to them. It could be said that when this takes place, there is going to be no thought as to what the child actually needs. This is going to be a time when the child has a strong need to belong and to be accepted, setting them up to accept what they are told. At this stage of their life, then, they are unlikely to rebel, and they are not going to have the ability to think for themselves either. Their Possession So, even though the child will have come through them not from them, in the words of Khalil Gibran, they will be seen as an extension of them. Due to the child not being seen as a separate being, it will be perfectly acceptable for them to impose their views onto the child. It is likely that they will believe that they are telling the child the truth, not simply passing on what they believe. There is also the chance that the same thing happened to them when they were children. The Sensible Approach If the child’s family actually respected them and realised that they are a separate being, they would most likely have a different approach. This doesn’t mean that they can’t teach the child any morals or guidance, but this is radically different to filling their child’s mind with ideas at an age when their mind is like a sponge. Once the child has developed the ability to think for themselves and no longer has such a strong need for approval, they will be ready to be exposed to this kind of information. Until that time comes, this can be seen as another form of child abuse. Fully Absorbed As the years go by, and the child gradually becomes an adult, what they were told as a child will have become internalised. Therefore, no matter what religion they were brought up on, it will be an important part of who they are. So important, that they might not even realise that it was something that they were forced to believe in as a child. In their eyes, it could be seen as the truth as opposed to something that was simply passed onto them at a stage in their life when they were extremely vulnerable. A Big Part of Life Alternatively, it might not have absorbed them to this degree, but it could still influence how they perceive the world in general. In particular, it could have a big impact on how they perceive people who are from other religions and those who are not religious. When this happens one is not seeing the world, or the people in it, with fresh eyes; they are seeing the world through the eyes of their ancestors. One is then going to have their own body, but they most certainly won’t have their own mind. A Big Difference If someone was to change their sports team as an adult, they might experience a fair amount of negative emotions. They may feel slightly anxious and even guilty, and feel as though they are being disloyal. On the other hand, if someone wanted to change their religion or to turn their back on religion altogether as an adult, it is likely to be far worse. Not only could they experience what the person above experiences, but they could also fear that they will be ostracised or even killed. Conclusion Ergo, while it would most likely be inaccurate to say that all religions would disappear if children were no longer indoctrinated from a young age, it would almost certainly have a considerable impact. As an adult, someone can decide for themselves what is right for them, and they might be more interested in knowing than in believing.
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Oliver JR Cooper http://www.oliverjrcooper.co.uk
When it comes to self-development, a lot has been said about how important it is to be able to experience self-control and to be resilient. Naturally, these are two incredibly important abilities to have in life.
If one is unable to control themselves, it is going to be a challenge for them to achieve anything worthwhile. Instead, they will most likely get caught up in endless distractions and trivialities. An Analogy One way to understand what can take place, if someone has no control, can be to imagine a child in a toy shop. In one moment they will be drawn to one area and, in the blink of an eye, they will be drawn to another area. This child won’t be able to stick to any one area, which will stop them from getting an understanding of anything. The reason being is that as soon as they start to concentrate on one toy, they will end up seeing another toy and soon end up walking away. A Wasted life To behave in this way as an adult is going to stop one from being able to stick to anything. Just like a child in a toy shop, they can start something and then put it to one side shortly after. There can the impact this will have on their career, along with other areas of their life. For example, if one can control themselves, it is most likely going to be a challenge for them to eat sensibly and to exercise on a regular basis. Where has it all gone? One could then look back on their life and wonder what they have been doing; it may seem as though life has just passed them by. Their emotions and their thoughts will then have controlled them, as opposed to one being able to manage these parts of their being. Without the ability to keep their thoughts and feelings in check, it will have had a negative effect on their life. One will be like a small boat that is tossed around the ocean, not a big ship that can handle just about anything. The Other Part And if one is unable to keep going during the setbacks that arise, it is also unlikely that they will be able to achieve anything that is significant. As soon as things heat up, so to speak, they will drop out. They might be fairly big built or they might not, but what they won’t have is the inner muscle that will enable them to keep going. Someone like this will want an easy like, not the strength to handle the challenges that life brings. An another Analogy This will be like going to a gym and not wanting to lift anything that is too heavy. This will make it easier for them to lift things, yet what it won’t do is allow someone to become stronger. It could then be said that they will be wasting their time, and that it might have been better if they had stayed at home. Taking this into account, the having the ability to tolerate pain is clearly vital. The Dark Side However, while being stoic is going to allow one to handle life, it can have a negative effect if it is taken to the extreme. Or to be more precise, this can be something that takes place due to someone’s interpretation of what it means to be stoic. Through reading up about it, someone can believe that they need to deny how they feel and to basically dominate their emotions. Their mind is then going to be in a constant battle with their body. One Dimensional Being this way may allow them to move forward and to achieve their goals, but it can also set them up to have problems when it comes to connecting with others. Their emotions, the things that will allow them to connect to others and for others to connect to them, will be pushed down. They are then going to be human, but they might come across as though they don’t really feel anything. This can then set them up to have a very lonely existence, and what they achieve probably won’t fill this gap. A Deeper Look What someone like this may find is that they didn’t have a good relationship with their emotions to begin with, with this being the reason why they were drawn to stoicism. Or why they came to believe that behaving in this way was what it meant to be stoic. One could then continue to deny how they feel and believe that they were doing the right thing. This would have provided them with validation that they needed to keep the truth at bay: that they are avoiding how they feel. Way Back This can show that they are carrying a lot of pain due to what took place during their early years. Perhaps this was a time when they didn’t receive the care that they needed in order to develop a healthy relationship with their emotions. At this time in their life, pushing their emotions down would have been a way for them to handle the pain they were in. As a result of what they experienced, it would have also most likely given them the ability to be able to handle a fair amount of pain. Awareness If one had an early childhood where they had to disconnect from their emotions and had no other choice than to tolerate extreme pain, it is not going to be a surprise if they are drawn to ‘stoicism’. This form of stoicism is then simply going to be another defence that one will use to avoid their inner wounds. If one can relate to this, and they want to become an integrated human being, they may need to reach out for external support. This is something that can be provided by the assistance of a therapist or a healer, for instance.
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Oliver JR Cooper http://www.oliverjrcooper.co.uk
If someone is in a relationship that they no longer want to be in, it might not be long until it comes to an end. Perhaps they have been together for a number of months, or they may have been with each other for a number of years.
Yet, regardless of the amount of time that they have been with them, they are not going to want to stay put. This doesn’t mean that it will be easy for them to end the relationship; what it comes down to is that being with this person is no longer serving them. A Small Price to Pay Therefore, the pain that they will experience in the short-term will pale in comparison to what will gain in the long-term. Cutting their ties with this person will allow them to let go of a lot of things and to embrace a number of new things. For example, by no longer being with the same person, it will make it easier for them to behave in new ways. Some of their current behaviours that are being affirmed by their partner will start to die-off when the relationship comes to an end. A New Beginning In the same way that living in a cold climate will have a certain effect on them, the relationship they are in will be the same. Thus, if this was to come to an end, it might be similar to moving somewhere that is warm. In a different climate, their behaviour is likely to change and so are the types of clothes that they wear. And once their relationship comes to an end, their behaviour is just as likely to change and they may even wear different clothes. A Number of Reasons They could be with someone who is abusive, for instance, which is going to have a negative effect on their wellbeing. Staying with this person is not going to serve them, the only thing that it will do is cause them to feel ever worse about themselves. Being with this person is not going to be pleasant, yet even when they spend time apart one is unlikely to feel much better. At the same time, one could just be in a relationship that has run its course. A Different Path Maybe they have been with this person since they were at school, and have since realised that they are no longer compatible. Or, they might have started dating this person when they were not in a good way, with it being clear that they got together for the wrong reason. Being clear about what is going on for them will stop them from leading their partner on, and it will give them more time to find someone else. Staying with them for the wrong reason is not going to serve them or their partner. Another Scenario However, although someone could behave in this way when they no longer want to be with their partner, they could also behave in a different way. What they could end up doing is spending time with other people. Through going with others, it will be more bearable for them to stay with their partner. One is then not going to be fully present with the person they are actually with, and they are not going to be fully present with the other people who they share their body with. A Release The people who they share their body with might not be people who they would actually want to be with if they were not with anyone else. Still, having these people in their life will allow them to let of stream. Living in this way is, ultimately, going to cause them to experience even more pressure than they would otherwise. They most likely won’t be a double agent, but they will lead a double life. What’s going on? What this can illustrate is that this person has a fear of being abandoned, with this being the reason why they can’t cut their ties with the person they are with. Due to this fear, they would only do this is if they had another person lined up who they knew would stick around. Ergo, keeping their partner around will provide them with the external stability that they need to keep this fear under control, and, going with other people will allow them to fulfil the need that they have to be with someone who they are attracted to. The messiness that exists externally will be a reflection of the messiness that exists within them. A Pattern In fact, there is a strong chance that they will only have relationships with people who they perceive as being dependable. Having someone like this in their life will then allow them to have their fun with people who they are actually attracted to. Consequently, the person they are officially with will be there whenever one of these affairs comes to an end. One way to look at this would be to imagine that one is a dependent child and their partner is their parent – one can then go and play with their friends without having to worry about being abandoned. The Cause If one has a fear of being abandoned, there is also the chance that they are carrying the pain of being abandoned. This can be the result of what took place during their childhood and/or it can relate to what happened during their birth and while they were in the womb. The trauma that is within them is going to make it more or less impossible for them to be able to handle their emotions and to feel like an interdependent adult. Instead of their emotions being another part of them, it could seem as though this is the only part that they have. Awareness If one can relate to this, and they want to change their life, they may need to reach out for external support. This is something that can be provided by the assistance of a therapist or healer, for instance.
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Oliver JR Cooper http://www.oliverjrcooper.co.uk
If someone had just bought a car, there is a strong chance that they would have taken it for a test drive first. This would have given them the opportunity to find out what it is like and to see if it would be a good match for them.
Along with this, they would have most likely asked a number of questions about the car. After all, this was a big decision, so it is a good thing that they had done their research and not just gone for any car. A Different Approach However, while someone might be judicious when it comes to what car they buy, this might not be the case when it comes to who they start a relationship with. Therefore, even though this is an important area of their life, they might act as though it isn’t. If they behaved this way when it came to buying a car, they could end up buying a car that is dangerous or only looks good from the outside. Either way, they will have ended up making a bad decision. The Main Thing What someone like this could find is that as long as another person looks good, it is enough for them to take things further. The effect that this person’s appearance has on them is then going to put them into an altered state of consciousness, with this state taking away their ability to think clearly. The Hallo Effect Thanks to the other person’s appearance, one will see them through rose coloured glasses. If they were to express what is taking place within them it might sound like this, ‘they look good, so every other part of them must also be good'. One is then not going to be taking a drug that interferes with their ability to think rationally, but it will be as though they are. One will have put the other person on a pedestal, which is likely to mean that they will have a long way to fall. Two Extremes As times goes by, it could become clear that the idea that they had of the other person earlier on had very little basis in reality. At one moment in time they would have been in heaven, but at another, they will be in hell. If something like this happened once it would be enough, but when this happens on a regular basis, it is going to cause someone to experience a lot of pain. It wouldn’t be accurate, though, to say that this is always what takes place when someone continually ends up with the wrong person. Another Scenario Conversely, one could find that they have the tendency to be drawn to people who come across as strong and capable. In the beginning they will feel as though they are with someone who will treat them well, only to find that this person ends up becoming really controlling. When this happens, the other person will have appeared to have possessed all the right traits in the beginning, yet ended up becoming someone else as time went by. Due to the amount of people they have been with who were like this, they may wonder if they have a sign on their head that says, ‘controlling people only’. The Common Denominator Although someone who ends up with the wrong person all the time could find it hard to see any positives in all this, the good thing is that they will be the person who keeps showing up. What this then means is that in order them for attract soemome who is different, they will need to change. The area that will most likely need to be changed is their inner world; changing their appearance in some way, for instance, is unlikely to be the answer. In the same way that changing a cars appearance is unlikely make it run better, changing their appearance is unlikely resolve what is taking place, either. One Option If someone is not willing to look at what is taking place within them, and the affect that this is having on this area of their life, they could ask their friends to help them out. So, when one meets someone who they think is a good match, they could ask one of their friends to come and spend some time with them on different occasions. The trouble with this approach is that their other person can put on an act at the beginning, and, ones friend might not be a good judge of character. On the other hand, if one starts to resolve the wounds that are within them, it will be easier for them to see other people for who they are as opposed to projecting so much onto them. Diving In In addition to this, they will gradually lose the attraction that they have to people who are not good for them. A number of the wounds that they will need to deal with can be the result of what happened whilst they were a child. What took place during their birth, in the womb, and what was passed down ancestrally, can also play a part in the type of person that they are attracted to as an adult. Dealing with this baggage won’t happen overnight, but it will happen as long as they are patient and persistent. Awareness If one wants to change this area of their life, they may need to reach out for external support. This is something that can be provided by the assistance of a therapist or healer, for instance.
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Oliver JR Cooper http://www.oliverjrcooper.co.uk
After the first and second world war, Germany had to pay back a lot of money in reparations. According to some accounts, this money has now been paid off, but there are other voices out there who claim that more money still needs to be paid.
Along with the price that Germany has had to pay financially, there is also the price that individual Germans have paid emotionally. And, even though most of the Germans alive today played absolutely no part in what took place all those years ago, it doesn’t mean that their conscience is clear. A Mixed Response Naturally, there are going to be a fair amount of Germans who don’t feel responsible for what happened. As a result of this, they are not going to be weighed done by something that took place before they were born. When it comes to other Germans, though, what took place before they were born is going to weigh heavily on their shoulders. Still, this doesn’t mean that every moment of their waking-life is spent feeling guilty. A Tight Grip For someone like this, they could have moments in their life when they think about the damage that their country did in the past. When this takes place, they could end up feeling really low. Their attention could then go somewhere else and they could soon forget about what happened in the past. When their attention does return to this time in their country’s history, it could be due to a number of reasons. The Trigger They could hear about something on TV or online and, instantly, their mind could reflect on the past. Not only will this guilt make them feel bad, it might also encourage them to make a difference in some way. For example, they may believe that it is their countries duty to take in an endless amount of people from other countries, with this being a way for their country to pay back its debt to the world. They might not even think about the effect that this will have on their country as time goes by. One Priority In this case, their main need is going to be to assuage their own guilt, not to actually do the right thing. If they were to look at the big picture, they may see that letting in an endless amount of people is simply going to cause havoc as the years go by. What this emphasises is how hard it can be for someone to think rationally when their emotions are out of control. Said another way, when their behaviour is being driven by their need to assuage their own guilt, it is going to be a lot harder for them to think clearly. Power in Numbers If just one person in Germany was influenced by guilt in this way it wouldn’t do much, but when millions of Germans are influenced by their guilt in this way, it is going to be a very different story. How much of what has taken place in Germany over the years, then, has been a way for so many Germans to manage their own guilt? Furthermore, if it wasn’t for this guilt, how different would Germany be at this moment in time? What is perfectly clear is that guilt can do more harm than good when it is out of control and not balanced out with consequential thinking. A Waste of Energy However, although a German can feel guilty about what took place in the past, it doesn’t mean that there is any reason for them to experience life in this way. Even if one of their ancestors caused a lot of harm, it doesn’t mean that they are responsible for their behaviour. Ultimately, they are an individual who is only responsible for how they behave, not how their ancestors behaved. What good does it do for someone to live like a sinner for something that they themselves played no part in? An Important Point It is highly likely that everyone on this planet has ancestors who did both good and bad things. Taking this into account, should everyone on this earth feel bad about themselves and behave in ways that will cause even more harm? Now, this is not to say that someone like this shouldn’t do what they can do live in the right way and to make a positive difference in the world. Yet, this is radically different to simply doing things to avoid feeling guilty and not seeing the big picture. A Hidden Agenda While the toxic guilt that a lot of Germans experience has done a lot of harm to Germany over the years, it has made it a lot easier for certain people to take advantage of this country. These people, with their own nefarious interests, realise how easy it is to manipulate so many of the German people. To make sure that each generation falls in line, they will be programmed from a very young age to see their history in a certain way. This will condition them to experience toxic guilt, which will weaken them from the inside. An Easy Target If someone is broken on the inside, there will be no need for anyone on the outside to control them; they will control themselves. A self-loathing human being is likely to be a passive human being - someone who won’t be a threat to the system. It might seem strange as to why anyone would want to damage a country, but this is no different to why anyone would want to damage another person. Someone like this is unlikely to be mentally sound. If someone struggles with toxic guilt, and they want to change their life, they may need to reach out for assistance. This is something that can be provided by the assistance of a therapist or a healer.
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Oliver JR Cooper http://www.oliverjrcooper.co.uk Critical Thinking: Are Certain Celebrities Causing Women To Sexually Objectify Themselves?13/12/2018
Unless someone has been living under a rock for a number of years, they will have most likely heard about a certain family that receives a fair amount of media exposure. In this family, there are a number of daughters who routinely strip off for different magazines.
That is, of course, when they are not showing their bodies off on different social media sites. It has also been said that a few of these daughters are the main reason why so many women want, and have ended up getting, bigger behinds. All Real Yet, although their faces and appearances have changed over the years, they have done their best to make out that most of it is down to their genetics. It is then as though getting surgery is perfectly acceptable, but that there is something shameful about openly admitting it. The trouble is that as these daughters have shared so many pictures of themselves online over the years, it is not hard for the average person to spot what has changed as time has passed. Merely spending a few minutes on a search engine will make it clear – one doesn’t need to be Sherlock Holmes to do it. A Big Impact Not only have these daughters had a big effect on the type of body shape that many women aspire to, they have also had a big impact on how thousands of women behave online. There is also the impact that they have had on how young girls behave online. In general, it is going to be far easier to influence a young girl than it will be to influence a grown woman. But, the fact that women from broth groups are being influenced by these daughters shows that women of all ages are vulnerable to this influence. One Outcome What also needs to be emphasised is that these daughters are not the only women who have played a part in all this. Nonetheless, these daughters have most likely played the biggest part, and they have helped to spawn a whole new line of women who are having the same impact. So, thanks, in part, due to their impact, it is not uncommon to come across young girls and women on social media who present themselves as sexual objects. Consequently, a lot of the images, and even the videos that they share, won’t be of their face, and they won’t be wearing much in a lot of them either. Hypersexualized A lot of the pictures that they share can be of their body and of their behind in particular. A woman could then be a student or simply have a normal job, yet she can create the impression that she is a soft-core porn star. At the same time, someone may only come to this conclusion if they grew up without the internet. The reason for this is that what was classed as explicit in the past is often seen as being normal now, with this partly being result to how accessible porn is nowadays. A Hungry Body Based on what a woman like this will share online, it can be as though her body is starving for acknowledgment. Receiving attention and approval for this part of her is then going to be more important than having any other part of her acknowledged and affirmed. Deep down, she may believe that her value as a human being depends on what her body looks like. Her emotional state is then going to be completely dependent on how her friends and strangers respond to what she shares online. More Than an Object Through spending so much time on her appearance and on editing the images that she uploads, it can cause her to overlook other parts of her being. By neglecting these other parts of her, it can result in her experiencing even more pressure to look right. There are also bound to be plenty of older women out there who are incensed with what is going on. For years, these women will have tried to stop women from being objectified by magazines and other sources, only for later generations to objectify themselves. One Cause It would be easy to point the finger at these daughters, and other women, for how so many women are behaving online. The problem with this is that it absolves other people of personality responsibility, creating a victim/perpetrator dynamic. In order for woman to have gone down this route, it is likely that there was already a weak point within her. And, the reason why she went down this route could be for the same reason why these daughters did. A Closer Look If someone is out of touch with their own inherent worth and, therefore, finds it hard to feel good about themselves, it can set them up to look towards others to compensate. With this in mind, perhaps a woman found it hard to feel good about herself, which is why she has ended up using her body to regulate how she feels. It would be easy to say that this she feels this way because of the messages she has absorbed from society. What this would do is totally overlook the effect that her earlier years had on her life. Emotionally Malnourished One idea that could be put forward here is that this woman grew up without a father, or that her father wasn’t emotionally available. This then stopped her from getting the feedback that she needed to develop confidence, to feel capable and to believe in herself. Hearing this can be hard if someone has been conditioned to believe that a man just provides the sperm and offers absolutely nothing to a child’s development. For quite some time now, it has been well-documented that so many people are now growing up without a father. A Narcissistic Family On the other hand, what this could show is that this woman was brought up by caregivers who were unable to love them for who they were. Instead, they would have only love them if they did want they wanted. This would have set them up to become a human doing, with them believing that their value was based on what they do, not on who they are. They would have had to fulfil their caregiver’s needs, overlooking their own needs in the process The Fallout This type of upbringing would have caused the woman to feel as though her true-self was inherently worthless. Her value is then going to be something that resides outside of herself. Ergo, unless she receives positive feedback from others, she will end up having to face the toxic shame that is within her, along with other painful feelings. Shame is a feeling that is not like any other, in that it is incredibly painful to experience. Conclusion Receiving positive feedback from others may keep her pain at bay, but it will come at a great price. For one thing, the level of attention that she receives won’t last forever - time will take its toll on her appearance. Being dependent on other people in this way is also going to make it hard for her to experience inner peace. And as was mentioned above, there can be other areas of her life that she will neglect. Focusing purely on her appearance can stop her from becoming a well-rounded person, with her having more than her looks to offer. This then becomes a vicious cycle, with her experiencing even more pressure to look good. If a woman can see that this is something that has got out of control, and she wants to change her life, she may need to reach out for external support. This is something that can be provided by a therapist or a healer.
If you feel this has been of value, please leave a comment, like or get in touch. And feel free to share this article, as many others have.
Oliver JR Cooper http://www.oliverjrcooper.co.uk Critical Thinking: Can Someone End Up With Mental And Emotional Problems If They Don’t Eat Meat?12/12/2018
Due, in part, to the amount of attention that the mainstream media give to mental and emotional problems, it can seem as though more people than ever before are in a bad way. In many easy, it is as though it is case of who doesn’t have them, not who does.
If this problem is a big as this source of information, along with the government, says it is, there are bound to be a number of reasons as to why this is. At the same time, one way of looking at this would be to say that this is another example of sensationalism, and that these two sources are making a mountain out of a hill. A New Definition What is playing a part in all this is that normal human experiences are being redefined as being abnormal. For example, someone can be in a lot of pain after the loss of a loved one and end up being diagnosed as having a mental illness. Also, if someone experiences anxiety from time to time or even feels a bit down now and then, the same thing could also take place. One is then only going to be a healthy human being if they always feel good and never experience ‘negative’ feelings or thoughts. An Expected Outcome Diagnosing normal human experiences as a being a sign of mental illness is naturally going to lead to an increase in the amount for people who are seen as having mental and emotional problems. Based on this perspective, everyone on the planet can be given the label of having a mental illness. The downside to this is that the people who are actually in a bad way, not those who simply have the ability to experience the full emotional spectrum, end up being lumped together with everyone else. This can then result in them not getting the attention, or the assistance, that they desperately need. A Damaging Effect Therefore, thanks to so many ‘experts’ who are only too happy to label normal experiences as being abnormal, real suffering ends up being trivialised. In addition to the impact that this approach is having on how this area of life is viewed, there is also the effect that people’s diets are actually having on their mental and emotional health. For one thing, a lot of the food that is available today is not as good as it was in the past, and, so much of today’s food is loaded with sugar and fake ingredients. And, if someone is putting all this junk into their body, it is going to a make it harder for them to function at their best. Two Ways However, while it would be easy to assume that someone’s mental and emotional health will be negatively affected by eating junk and supported by eating healthy food, it is not this black and white. For example, someone can be in a position where they don’t eat meat, with meat being seen as something that is not healthy. Not only can they have this view of meat, but they can also believe that it is not right to eat animals. Yet, even though they have these views, they could find that they are not in a good way. Malnourished As a result of not eating meat, they could be starving their body of the nutrients that it needs to function in first gear, let alone fifth gear. Their body is going to be starved of the essential nutrients that meats provides. What they may find, if they were to have a number of different tests done, is that they are low on iron, zinc, B vitamins and number of amino acids, for instance. Through being deficient, it will be more or less impossible for them to function properly. The Symptoms One may find that it is hard for them to feel good or that they are overly emotional and that it doesn’t take a lot for them to get upset. Or, they may have absolutely no energy and spend a lot of time feeling down or even depressed. Their anxiety could be out of control, with them having the tendency to experience panic attacks. Then again, one might find that they can relate to all of these things. Inner Conflict The trouble is that just because their intellect decided that meat was no good, it wouldn’t have meant that every other part of their being came to the same conclusion. The rest of them will be craving the very thing that their mind has disregarded. In a way, no longer eating meat to save the environment is tantamount to no longer breathing in order to cut down on the amount of carbon dioxide that is produced. The difference is that while removing meat will cause someone to suffer, not breathing will cause them to die. Another Perspective Conversely, it could be said that someone like this is not suffering mentally and emotionally due to the fact that they are not eating meat; they are suffering due to the fact that they are not getting the right nutrients. This is then a problem that can be resolved without needing to eat meat. With the right guidance, they will be able to eat other things and to take supplements that will get them back on the right track. This shows how important it is for someone to make sure that they are getting the right nutrients, irrespective of what they do or don’t eat. Conclusion It can be easy for someone to eat with their head as opposed to their body, setting them up to deprive their body (and mind) of what it needs to perform at its best. What can’t be overlooked is that a few years of programming won’t change thousands of years of evolution. So, if someone has found that their mental and emotional health has suffered ever since they stopped eating meat, they will need to find another way to make up for nutrients that they are missing out on. That is, of course, if they are not willing to eat meat again.
If you feel this has been of value, please leave a comment, like or get in touch. And feel free to share this article, as many others have.
Oliver JR Cooper http://www.oliverjrcooper.co.uk |
Oliver JR CooperAuthor of 26 books, Transformational Writer, Teacher & Consultant. Introductory Consultation
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Disclaimer
That which is contained within these articles is based on my own empirical understanding and is true for me at the time they were written. However, as I continue to grow, what I perceive as the truth will inevitably change and as a result of this - parts of these articles may not reflect my current outlook.
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