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If someone were to step back and reflect on how they experience life, what might enter their mind is that they have a number of fears. Due to this, it is likely to make it difficult for them to embrace life.
In general, they could live in a way that causes them to be on the outside and unable to make the most of the life that they have been given. As a result, they could often feel angry, frustrated and helpless about not being able to freely express themselves. A Closer Look So, when it comes to what they fear, they may have some, if not all, of the following fears:
Weighed Down Now, if they only have a few of these fears, it is to be expected that it would be difficult for them to embrace life. They are going to have the ability to freely express themselves, but thanks to what is going on for them, it will be as if they are living in an invisible prison. Naturally, for their life to change, they will need to leave this invisible prison. For them to do this, it could be said that it will be a good idea for them to reach out for external support. The next Stage If they were to work with a therapist, for instance, this can be a time when they will explore what it is that they fear. After this, they could be told that what they fear is irrational and has no basis in reality. Consequently, they could end up questioning what they believe and replacing their ‘negative’ thoughts. In other words, they will focus on what is going on for them up top, so to speak, and do what they can to change it. One outlook As these fears will be irrational, there will be no reason for them to have them. It will then be similar to someone having a life-sized car or a boat in their living room; it won’t serve a purpose. However, although what they fear can appear to be irrational, what if there is far more to it? What if, what they fear is only seen as being irrational, as their history is not being taken into account? A Deeper Look If they were able to go back in time and observe what it was like for them from the moment that they were born and for a number of years after, they might come to a different conclusion. What they might see is that what they fear relates to what they experienced and is, thus, completely rational. If so, this is likely to have been a stage of their life that was anything but nurturing, with this being a time when they were greatly deprived and deeply wounded. Practically from the moment that they were born, they might have missed out on the attunement and care that they needed. A Brutal Time Not receiving the attunement and care that they needed would have caused them to be overwhelmed with pain and greatly suffer. They would have felt rejected and as though they were going to fall apart and be swallowed by pain. And, when they were given attention, they would have felt engulfed and as though they were going to be annihilated. As a number of years passed, they might have often been humiliated and left. The past is present To handle the pain that they were in, their brain would have repressed how they felt and a number of their needs. This would have allowed them to keep it together and function. What happened at this stage of their life will be over, of course, but they will still carry the meaning that they made and the emotional impact that it had on them. But, as they haven’t been consciously aware of what is going on for them at a deeper level, their disconnected mind has come to the conclusion that what has happened is something that will happen. Moving Forward For them to be able to experience life differently, they are going to have beliefs to question, pain to face and work through, and unmet developmental needs to experience. This will take courage, patience and persistence. Awareness If someone can relate to this and they are ready to change their life, they may need to reach out for external support. This is something that can be provided with the assistance of a therapist or healer.
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Oliver JR Cooper http://www.oliverjrcooper.co.uk
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 Oliver JR CooperAuthor of 28 books, Transformational Writer, Teacher & Consultant. Introductory Consultation
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Disclaimer
That which is contained within these articles is based on my own empirical understanding and is true for me at the time they were written. However, as I continue to grow, what I perceive as the truth will inevitably change and as a result of this - parts of these articles may not reflect my current outlook.
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