Emotional Birth: Can Early Deprivation Stop Someone From Experiencing An Emotional Birth?

Even though someone will have had a physical birth, it doesn’t mean that they had an emotional birth. When it comes to the former, this is something that would have taken place automatically.

However, when it comes to the latter, this would have largely depended on how emotionally available their mother and perhaps their father were. But, even if they didn’t receive the emotional nutrients that they needed for their emotional self to grow and develop, it doesn’t mean that they will be consciously aware of this.

Hidden

In fact, they might not remember a great deal about this stage of their life. And, if they were to think about it, they could think about how it ‘wasn’t that bad’ and believe that other people have it far worse.

If this is the case, it doesn’t mean that they have consciously chosen to forget about what it was like. Most likely, their brain will have blocked out what was going on during their formative years and this information will have continued to be repressed.

The outcome

Along with this, they are likely to have created a view of reality during this time that made it easier for them to handle what was going on. As they were egocentric, this would have related to them being bad and their parent or parents being good.

Of course, as they were powerless and dependent at this stage, it would have been too much for them to accept that their parent or parents couldn’t give them what they needed. Moreover, believing that they were to blame would have given them the hope, the false hope, that they could change what was going on.

A Defensive System

Due to this, the view that they have of their childhood won’t be accurate but they won’t be aware of this. Nonetheless, while this stage of their life will be in the past, the impact that it had on them won’t be.

As a result of what they missed out on, they can suffer in a variety of different ways. So, they can often feel low and empty, often experience self-doubt, and struggle to feel a sense of belonging.

Another Part

Thanks to what typically takes place inside them, they are unlikely to live a life that is very fulfilling. So, they could work somewhere that is soul-destroying, or they could do something that they enjoy but not have been able to get very far.

If they are in an intimate relationship, their partner might not be abusive but they might not appreciate them. Furthermore, they might not have any close friends.

At The Root

Beyond what is going inside them and how this impacts their outer world, there will be how they feel deep down. This will relate to how they feel outside of their conscious awareness and in their unconscious mind.
At this level, they can feel worthless, unloved, as though they don’t belong and unsafe. In other words, they are not going to embody a sense of wholeness.

A Mirror

If they had a felt sense of worth, love, belonging and safety, their outer world would be radically different. The reason for this is that they are not merely an observer of reality; what is taking place inside them has an impact on how they experience life.

This is because, beyond their physical appearance, they are made up of vibrating energy. The feelings that they embody will cause them to be drawn to people, things and circumstances that are aligned with their level of consciousness and repel the people, things and circumstances that aren’t.

A key Point

This is why it has been said that ‘we attract what we are, not what we want’. For them to consistently have experiences where they are valued, loved, accepted and feel at home, they will need to embody these feelings or this inner state.

Now, if their early years were a time when they had a mother and a father who were generally attuned and caring, they are likely to embody these feelings. They would have a deep sense that they are valuable, loved, belong and are safe.

An Important Process

This illustrates how important love is when it comes to growing and developing in the right way. If their parent or parents had been able to love them, they would have received the emotional nutrients that they needed for their inner wholeness to be activated.

As opposed to feeling like an empty vessel that needs filling up, they would have a sense of wholeness. They would then feel like an interdependent not a dependent human being.

Moving Forward

When they become aware of what is going on, for them to go through an emotional birth, they are likely to have a lot of pain to face and work through. This will take courage, patience and persistence.

Awareness

If someone can relate to this and they are ready to change their life, they may need to reach out for external support. This is something that can be provided with the assistance of a therapist or healer.

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Oliver JR Cooper
http://www.oliverjrcooper.co.uk