False-Self: Can Someone Create A False-Self When They Feel Worthless?

Although some people are in touch with their true-self, and allow their life to be influenced by it, there are others who experience life differently. As a result of this, it can mean that they are out of touch with who they are.
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When one is in touch with their true-self, it is likely to mean that they will be aware of their needs and feelings, amongst other things. And through feeling comfortable enough to listen to what is going on within them, it allows them to express who they are.

Authentic Life

Through being able to experience life in this way, it is likely to mean that the people in their life will know who they are. Due to this, one won’t feel the need to put on an act around them, and this is going to be very fulfilling.

There is also the chance that they will have a career that matches up what matters to them, or they will be working towards something that is in alignment with what they value. One could be working for someone else or self-employed, or they could be studying.

Priority

It could then be said that as one is able to be themselves in life, they are not going to be focused on pleasing other people. This is not to say that they will go out of their way to displease them; what it comes down to is that they won’t give their power away.

Now, this is also doesn’t mean that one will only think about themselves. For one thing, there is a strong chance that when they fulfil their needs, it will have a positive effect on other people.

For Example

When it comes to the kind of profession they have, they are bound to be making a difference in others people’s lives. Thus, even though they are putting their needs first, it still allows them to be there for others.

And as they are doing something that is important to them, they are likely to completely commit to it. This can then mean that the people they assist will be only too happy with what they offer.

Two Sides

There is not just going to be how this benefits one’s life; there will be how it benefits other people’s lives. It could then be said that one will be doing what they came here to do, and this will shine through.

However, this doesn’t mean that one will always be happy or what they won’t have any ‘bad’ days, what it means that they will be on the right track. One may have experienced life in this way for as long as they can remember, or it may be how their life has been for a short while.

Alternatively

Yet while some people are going to experience life in this way, there are going to be others who are having a different experience. This will then mean that they are going to be out of touch with their true-self, or they might not be possible for them to express who they are.

Either way, ones life is not going to be a reflection of who they are, and this is going to mean that they will have developed a false-self. This will be something that allows them to function in the world.
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Two Ways

On one side, this can mean that one will come across as though they are not very confident, and on the other side, they could come across as though they are full of confidence. If they can identify with the former, it could mean that they haven’t achieved very much.

But if they can relate to the latter, it can mean that they have achieved a lot, and they could be perceived as being extremely successful. In this case, it could mean that other people won’t always realise something isn’t right.

A Role Model

In fact, there could be plenty of people that look up to them, and one could then be a role model. It could be said that this is to be expected; especially as so many people want to be successful in today’s world.

On the other hand, when one hasn’t got a lot going on in their life, for instance, there could be people who describe them as having low self-esteem. There could then be people who encourage them to go after their dreams, or to believe in themselves.

Hidden

But even if one is perceived as a success in the eyes of others, it is still going to be a challenge for them to experience true fulfilment. When one’s life is not a reflection of their true-self, they are likely to be focused on pleasing other people.

This is not to say that they don’t want to reveal who they are (that’s if they are aware of their true feelings and needs); what it comes down to is that they are not going to feel comfortable doing it. They could believe that the reason they have to hide who they are is because there is something wrong with them.

Worthless

At a deeper level they could feel completely worthless, and it is then going to be necessary for them to create an identity that other people will approve of. For if they were to see who they really are, one can believe that it would cause other people to reject and/or abandon them.

It then won’t matter how much this causes them to suffer, as one will be in a position where they will believe that there is nothing they can do. One will then have to continue to experience life in the same way.

A Deeper Look

When one believes that they have to hide who they are in order to be accepted by others, it can due to what took place during their childhood years. This could have been a time when they experienced some kind of abuse and/or neglect.

These experiences would then have set one up to believe that they are inherently flawed, and they would have had no other choice than to hide their true-self.  At this time, it would have allowed them to survive a dysfunctional environment, but as time has passed, it will have caused them to suffer unnecessarily.

Awareness

Ultimately, there is nothing wrong with ones true-self, and order of them to realise this, they may need to work with a therapist. This can be a time where they will be questioning what they believe and dealing with what is taking place in their body.

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Oliver JR Cooper
http://www.oliverjrcooper.co.uk