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When Errol Campbell and I were doing live videos about a year ago, he said that it wasn’t just about us giving advice. While this was part of it, he also said that we were there to hold the space so that the people on the call could find their own answers.
At the time, I found it hard to get my head around what he said and to understand how this approach would work. This was because a big part of me believed that it was up to me to come up with all the answers. A Heavy Weight He went on to say that needing to have all the answers created a lot of pressure, which was something that I could relate to. I felt that it was down to me to always say the right thing, so that I could solve other people’s problems. After sitting with what he said for a while, it became clear that the reason why I had this outlook was due to what was going on within me. Deep down, I felt incapable and this then defined how I perceived other people who needed assistance. A Reflection Ultimately, without realising it, I was projecting the view I had of myself onto these people. I soon came to the conclusion that the reason why Errol saw people as already being whole and complete was due to the fact that this is how he sees himself. However, this is not to say that I believe that he is simply projecting his view of himself onto these people. Naturally, how he views himself plays a part, but what must also play a part is the fact that he can see that people are not broken. Beyond The Wounds Sure, someone may not be in a good way and may need some kind of assistance, yet that doesn’t mean that this is a reflection of who they truly are. In order to see beyond what is currently going on for someone like this, one will need to have worked through a lot of their own wounds or at the very least, to have the awareness not to project these wounds onto them and to see them as being incapable in the process. Through providing external support or presence to someone like this, it can allow them to see themselves for who they really are and to connect to the guidance that is within them. It may slowly occur to them that even though they are not in a good way, this is not a sign of their true essence. Final Thoughts So, if you are not in a good way right now and a lot is going on within you, this doesn’t mean that you need to be fixed or rescued. And, as you work through the wounds that are within you, this is likely to become clear. Although you have may be used to experiencing life in this way, you will gradually come to see that what is going on for you has about as much to do with who you are as a common cold does.
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Oliver JR Cooper http://www.oliverjrcooper.co.uk
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 Oliver JR CooperAuthor, Transformational Writer, Teacher & Consultant - With Over 2,000,000 Article Views Online. Disclaimer
That which is contained within these articles is based on my own empirical understanding and is true for me at the time they were written. However, as I continue to grow, what I perceive as the truth will inevitably change and as a result of this - parts of these articles may not reflect my current outlook.
My Books...
A Dialogue With The Heart - Part One
Trapped Emotions
Childhood
A Dialogue With The Heart - Part Two
Toxic Shame
Abandonment
Child Abuse
A Dialogue With The Spirit
Trapped Grief
Why Does He Behave That Way? Why Do I Behave This Way?
Boundaries
Inner Child
Childhood Trauma
People Pleasing
Loyalty
Trauma
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