After the relationship that I was in at the beginning of 2013 came to an end, I ended up coming into contact with a lot of emotional pain. Although a certain amount of pain had been coming up for a little while, the end of the relationship brought it all up the surface.
Fortunately, I was able to find someone who could help me to let go of the emotional pain that I was in my body. But before all this came up, I remember talking to the woman who I was with about the different therapies and techniques that I had used, and this was a time when she asked me if I had done enough.
I Had Only Just Begun
When she said this to me, I said that I think I’m nearly done now. But what I soon realised - after our time together came to an end - was that I had only just started.
For so long, I had only been dealing what with had been taking place in my mind; what had been taking place in my body had largely been ignored. I think that I had actually been working with someone for about two weeks before all this pain came up.
I Needed To Know
The technique that this person used was something called SHEN therapy, and I heard about this through a friend. At the time, this friend owed a shop that sold books, crystals and other similar items.
I had a rough idea about why I was feeling the way I was, and this was largely because I had been looking into the effect that our childhood can have on us for around five years. Even so, I wanted to know more so I read a fair amount of books during this time.
It Was Clear
Through being in touch with how I felt and reading different books on childhood development, I had this sense that I was neglected as a baby. I knew that I had been neglected as a child, but up until this point I didn’t know that it went back even further.
The emotional pain I was in was immense; I wasn’t sure how I was going to get through it. In addition to feeling like an abandoned baby, I also had memories that backed up how I felt.
Part of me found this hard to believe; especially as I had heard that it is not possible for someone to remember anything from this time in their life. But that didn’t change the fact that I was being overwhelmed by feelings that I could do very little about.
So, if I only had memories in my head and I was able to think my way out of how I felt, I would have accepted that I had constructed these memories. However, as I had so much emotional pain/trauma in my body, I couldn’t think my way out of this.
This Evidence Was Provided
As the months passed, the pain within me gradually disappeared. And about a year after this, I came into contact with someone who looked after me from time to time when I was a baby.
This person told me that there were moments when I was abandoned as a baby, and that they knew that something wasn’t right. I think that this person felt guilty, guilty that they didn’t do more.
I wasn’t angry at this person, though; if anything, I was pleased that there was someone like this around when I was younger. What was clear was that I would have been in a far worse position if it wasn’t for this person.
They said that they were unsure about whether they should tell me this, but I told them that I was glad that they did. I said that I had sensed that this was what took place, and hearing this provided me with the validation that I needed.
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Oliver JR Cooper
Oliver JR Cooper
Teacher, Author, Transformational Writer & Consultant - With Over 2,000,000 Article Views Online.
That which is contained within these articles is based on my own empirical understanding and is true for me at the time they were written. However, as I continue to grow, what I perceive as the truth will inevitably change and as a result of this - parts of these articles may not reflect my current outlook.
A Dialogue With The Heart - Part One
A Dialogue With The Heart - Part Two
A Dialogue With The Spirit
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