It has been said that the average person spends most of their life at work, and this shows why it is so important for someone to do something that is fulfilling. If they don’t, this one area is likely to have a negative effect on every other area of their life.
Point of Focus When they are at work, it could be normal for them to think about what they will be doing when they finish. And when they are not at work, they could spend a lot of time thinking about how it will only be matter of time before they have to go back As a result of this, it is going to be a challenge for them to enjoy the time they spend at work and the time they have off. One could feel as though they have very little, if any, control over their life. Pain Relief This is not to say that one will always be in touch with this pain though, as they could have moments when they disconnect from how they feel. One could have a number of ways to get away from what is taking place within them. Drinking alcohol could be one way for them to avoid how they feel and/or they could spend a lot of time watching TV. A lot of their money could also be spent on going on holidays, and this will be a way for them to get away from it all. Going Away This is then going to be radically different to the people who go away to recharge their batteries. There could be times when they go away for get away from it all, but this is likely to be the exception. However, if someone like this was to tell them to change their life so that they don’t need to escape, it might not have much of an effect on them. And if one feels as though they can’t change their life, this is to be expected. Fortunate One could believe that the people who do have a fulfilling career are different to them, or that they are lucky, for instance. There is the chance that they are different, but that doesn’t mean that one can’t do anything about their circumstances. At one point in time, the other person may have been in the same position as them. This is not to say that their life would have changed overnight, as it might have taken them quite some time. The First Step Perhaps they left where they were working and started working somewhere else, and there life may have completely changed. Alternatively, it may have been a more gradual process, and this could be a sign that one started to their own business while they were still at their old job. The fact that they were doing this might have made it easier for them get out of bed each day. Once they had built it up enough, they would have been able to walk away without having to worry about what they would do. Transformed There will be the effect this has had on their own well-being, and it will also have had an effect on the people in their life. Getting out of bed in the morning is likely to be a lot easier, and when they go away, they will look forward to coming home. When they are not working, they will be able to use their time more productively; instead of doing everything they can to avoid reality. Their friends and family might also have found it a lot easier to be around them. A Different Reaction One may have found that some of the people they spent time with are no longer in their life, and this could be because they no longer had a connection with them. They would have changed, but some of their friends might not have been willing embrace the person they had become. On the other hand, one may have found that spending time around them was having a negative effect on their well-being. It was then in their best interest to move on and to spend time around people who would have a positive effect on their life. More of a Challenge But even though someone is going to suffer when they have a job or a career that isn’t right for them, it doesn’t mean that everyone will suffer in the same way. It can be a lot easier for some people to work somewhere that is not very fulfilling. What this partly comes down to is that not everyone deals with stress in the same way, and this is due to the fact that not everyone is the same. If one is sensitive, for instance, being in the wrong job is soon going to wear them down. Highly Sensitive Person It will be a lot harder for them to walk away at the end of the week and to deal with the stress that they are experiencing. They might not have the energy to do anything, but unless they realise why they are experiencing life is this way, they could believe that there is something wrong with them. This is going to be far from the truth; what it will come down to is that they need to have a job/career that will allow them to make the most of their sensitive nature. When this happens, there will be no reason for them to suffer unnecessarily, and they will be able to thrive. The Right Option One thing they could do is to start their own business, as this is likely to give them far more control than they would have if they worked for someone else. Through taking this route, they will be able to pay attention to their own needs; whereas if they were to work for someone else, it would be a lot harder for them to do so. Through being able to do this, they will be able to work somewhere that isn’t too loud or where there is a lot going on. They also won’t have to be around people who lack empathy or those who will drain them. There won’t be anyone looking over their shoulder and judging their performance, and this will make it easier for them to relax. And if they feel overwhelmed, they will be able to take a break. Awareness If one believes that this would be the best option for them to take, they can begin to look into what kind of business they could start. The work that they will have to put it to make this a reality will be worth the effort in the long-run.
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Oliver JR Cooper http://www.oliverjrcooper.co.uk
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While it is not as if people have just started sharing their views, there is a difference when it comes to how things used to be. For one thing, the internet has given people a platform to do so.
Restricted In the past, someone would have generally shared their views with their friends and family, and that might have been as far as it went. Or, if they were a journalist, they would have had a far bigger audience. Therefore, the average person wouldn’t have had a platform that allowed them to reach a wider audience. As a result of this, most of what they said wouldn’t have had much of an effect on the wider world. Unnoticed And if it did have a negative effect the people around them, it doesn’t mean that anything would take place. These people wouldn’t have been able to record what was going on, and so they may have just carried on with their life. Perhaps they believed that hearing views that they didn’t like was just part of life and that they simply had to put up with it. If they reported what took place to the police, it might not have gone very far, and this could come down to a lack of evidence. A Big Difference However, now that someone can use the internet, their views can have far more influence than before. People from all over the world can see what they say, and this can happen directly or indirectly. If it happens directly, it is likely to be a sign that one of their followers/’friends’ has seen what they have said. One might just have one social media account, or they could have a number of them. A Number of Options The more they have, the greater their influence is likely to be, and this is because not everyone uses the same site. When it comes to getting their views out, some sites will be better than others And if other people see what one has said in an indirect way, it can be due to what other people have shared. What one says can end up spreading like wild fire, and the fact they only need an internet connection and a device to do this shows how much the world has changed. Under Surveillance The technology that allows this to take place, has also given people the ability to film what other people say to them. Once this has taken place, they can upload the video to the internet. The video can then allow one to gain the support of other people, and it will give them the evidence that they need to get the police involved if they have been offended. When it comes to what approach they take, it can all depend on what has taken place. Different Levels If someone was to say something online, it might not have much of an effect on others. This could be a sign that they haven’t said anything offensive or it could mean that it has only been seen by people who agree with what they have said. For example, if they were to talk about sports or music, it is unlikely to cause people to report them or to try to have them banned. If it does annoy them, it could just show that they don’t agree with them. Outrage On the other hand, they could say something that will cause other people to completely lose it. This could mean that other people will end up feeling angry and/or upset, and they could end up telling their friends about what has been said. It is then not going to take very long for what they have said to gain a lot of exposure, and they may even end up being reported. One could then end up receiving a warning, or they may even end up being banned. Hate Speech What they have said is then going to be seen as being unacceptable, and if they receive a warning they will naturally need to be careful what they say in the future. This could show that one has said something about women, religion, or touched upon what is taking place when it comes to immigration. It is then not going to matter that they have simply shared their own views, and that what they said might be worth paying attention to, as they will be treated as though they have done something wrong. Still, this will stop them from being able to offend others, and so it could be seen as the right approach. Free Speech When this takes place, it could be said that people’s feelings are going to be the point of focus. Making sure that people are not offended is going to be far more important than making sure that people are allowed share their views. Now, it could be said that this is a sign of empathy, and that it is a good thing that people’s feelings are being respected. However, the downside to this is that it creates the impression that people have no control over how they feel. Protection But if other people do control how they feel, it is then going to be necessary to silence free speech. In addition to this, silencing people could be seen as a way to protect people from being exposed to information that could harm them. Therefore, if this didn’t take place, it would be a challenge for them to feel at peace and the world wouldn’t be as safe as it is. The people who crack down on views that are seen as being unacceptable are then playing a vital role. Conclusion One way of looking at this would be to say that not only are people being treated like children; there are plenty of people who are acting like children. As an adult, one is generally responsible for how they feel, and they are old enough to handle different kinds of information. Stopping people from expressing their views might seem like the right thing to do, but it is likely to do more harm than good. If anything, it might be more accurate to say that this is simply a way to control people, and to keep them in an infantile state.
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Nowadays, it is not uncommon for people to be part of some kind of movement, and it could be said that this is a partly down to the internet. Through being able to go online, one can connect to people who have the same views as them.
As a result of this, the next step can be for them to identify with a certain term or group, for instance. Yet, this is not always how it works, as one could simply go to university and end up in the same position. Reaching Out When this happens, one will have been looking for people who they can talk to about what they believe, and these people can also give them support. Therefore, at one point one might have felt as though they were the only ones who saw life in this way, and then as time has passed, the will realise that this is not the case. And by being part of a group or a movement, it is likely to have a positive effect on how they feel. For the first time in their life, they could feel as though they actually belong on this planet. Another Route However, one could also end up being part of something like this without going out of their way to do so. What this could show is that one’s friends are part of something, and they have end up getting involved. If one was to start university, for instance, they could go along to a society as a way to make friends. Time will then go by and, before they know it, they will have come to have the same views as these people. Under The Surface This could show that one joined a society that has an important role to play in today’s world, or that they have gradually been conditioned to accept what they were told. At the same time, what this could show is that even though they were not looking to belong to somewhere like this, they soon came to see that they could relate to what was being spoken about. But regardless of whether one is a part of a society at a university and or is part of an online movement, they are likely to have plenty of things to talk about. And when it comes to what they believe needs to change about the world, it can all depend on what sex they are. Different Areas If they were to talk about relationships, there are going to be number of things that they will want to discuss. The same could be said if they were to talk about how their sex is treated when it comes to their career. Another important topic could be how their sex is portrayed by the media, and how the opposite sex treats them. There could also be a number of other things that they need to talk about. The Average Person Ever so, this doesn’t mean that the only people who talk about these kinds of things are those who are part of a movement. This could be because they don’t realise there is one, or it could be a sign that have no interest in joining one. What this can also show is that even though they are not part of a movement, it has still influenced their thinking. Due to how big the movement is and the effect it has had on their society, it won’t be necessary for people to join it to be influenced by it. Plenty of Time If a movement has been around for a number of years and the people who part of this movement has been able to attain positions of power, this is to be expected. What these people have been able to achieve over the years will be seen in a positive light by some people. For others, it might not be this black and white, and they could say that while certain things have improved, there are other things that haven’t. Still, there are bound to be many different factors involved when it comes to the outlook that one has. Objectification One thing that women can complain about is how women are often objectified in today’s world. This can be a time when they will focus on how the mainstream media and men don’t treat women as human beings. They could talk about how this causes women to be treated badly by men, as it sets them to believe they are entitled to do what they want to them. And while some women will talk about this from time to time, there will be others who take it further. On A Mission This one issue could be something that will consume their whole life, and they could do everything they can do change the world. One way they could try to do this is to write about it and/or to create videos, and they could go even further and try to have certain things banned. What this can then mean is if she was to see a woman who was half-naked or completely naked in a magazine or newspaper, she would be seen as someone who is being taken advantage of. This can then be seen as an example of how women are treated badly by men. Opposition Although this could be a time when she will receive a lot of support from both men and women, there is also likely to be men and women who have a different outlook. When it comes to what men say, it might be easy for them to overlook what they hear; but when it comes to women, it might be harder to do so. One thing that they could hear from women is that the women who do this are not being taken advantage of and that they are actually being empowered by it. This is what they have chosen to do, and it is allowing them to pay their bills. Online During this time, people could also bring up the fact that there are plenty of women who objectify themselves on social media. And how this is not something they are being forced to do; they are doing it by choice. It could then be said that it is not that women don’t like being objectified; it is that they like to be in control of when this happens. As long as they are not taken advantage of and they get something out of it (money or attention from the right people/person), it might not bother them. A Closer Look Nevertheless, she could hear this and it might not have an effect on her outlook. This could show that she has thought about it and then dismissed it, or that she is not willing to change what she believes. When this is an issues that consumes her, it can show that she is trying to avoid how she feels at a deeper level. If she was to get in touch with what is taking place within her, she could find that she is jealous of the women who receive attention and are seen as being desirable. Left Out As a result of what she looks like or her age, it might not be possible for her to compete with these women. But instead of owning how she feels and dealing with these feelings, she ends up disconnecting from how she feels and takes the moral high ground. If she was to choose the first option, she is unlikely to feel good about herself. Yet, by choosing the second option, she can end up feeling empowered and a sense of superiority can arise. Awareness Clearly, there are women who are objectified by men and women, and this something men also experience. If a woman is trying to avoid how she feels by focusing in this problem, it could cause her to do more harm than good. Through facing how she feels at a deeper level and working through it, she may find that this is an issue that no longer has the same effect on her. The assistance of a therapist may be needed here.
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In today’s world, there are all kinds of ways for people to help others, and it is also easy for them to let their friends know about what they have been doing. In the past, one would have generally needed to be around others in order to make a difference.
Another Way But thanks to the internet, this is something that they can now do from the comfort of their own home. If they want to send money to a certain cause, for instance, they won’t need to exert themselves. The only thing they will have to do is to tap their screen and the money will be on its way. Therefore, if they were to come across a cause that pulls them in, they will have the ability to make a contribution. The Same Now, it could be said that it has been possible to give money over the phone for years and so this is not much different. This option has been available for a while, but it doesn’t compare with being able to send money over a device. And when one uses their device, they will be exposed to all kinds of different causes. When it came to the old approach, there would have only have been a few for them to choose from, and these options might not have always have related to matters that concerned them. In Alignment The kind of causes that they come into contact can relate to things that they hadn’t even heard of for most of their life. This can be the result of them being able to connect to people from all over the world. Going online can allow one to find out about what is taking place in other parts of the world, and once they are aware of something, they could feel the need to act. Yet, if they didn’t have the internet, they probably wouldn’t have heard about it. A Number of Options This doesn’t mean that the only way for one to make a difference will be to spend money, as there are going to be a number of ways that this can take place. For example, one could join a forum and give their advice on certain topics. If one has overcome a number of different challenges, they could share this with people who are going through a challenging time. The good thing about doing this online is it that one will be able to hide their identity if they choose to. A Bit of Both Therefore, if one wants to make a difference in the world and around them, they will be able to. In their eyes, they may feel as though it is their duty to look further than what is taking place around them. One could see themselves as a humanitarian, and if they were to only think about the people they to come into contact with, they could feel as though they are not doing enough. Thus, the only way for them to sleep at night might be for them to reach out to people who are going through a difficult time. Hidden One may prefer to keep these things to themselves, and not have the need to tell anyone else, or they may only prefer to tell the people who they are close to. This could be something that they will talk about when they get together. What this can show is that they don’t help others to look good; they do it because it is in line with their values. There is then no reason for them to receive approval from other people. On The Other Hand Alternatively, one may have the need to tell their friends about how they have been helping others. This could mean that they will get in touch with their friends and tell them, and it may involve them writing about it on social media. This could be a sign that their desire to help others is partly driven by their need to look good. There may even be the chance that this is the only reason why they help others, and it could then be normal for them to be drawn to things that are seen as being good causes. The Inside However, regardless of whether one typically keeps what they do to themselves or has the inclination to tell others, there can also be the effect it has on their own well-being. Through reaching out to others, one could find that they experience a mental and emotional boost. After they have done something, they could think about how they are having a positive effect on the world. The high that they get from this could last for quite some time, and it might only be a matter of time before they want to do something else. Caught Up This could be seen as a part of the process, and if one didn’t feel this way after doing something, they might be less likely to help others. Still, it is going to be important for one to make sure that they don’t become consumed by how they feel. As if this was to take place, they could end up helping other people for the wrong reasons, and they could do more harm than good. What this comes down to is that when one helps someone, they can stop them from helping themselves. Enabling For example, if one was to come across someone who was begging on the street, they might feel the need to give them money. After this has taken place, they can walk away with their head held high. But through giving this person money, it can stop them from actually going something about their situation. They might also end up using the money to buy things that will cause them further harm. Conclusion This shows why it is important for one to not only listen to their heart, but to also listen to their head. As if one is able take a step hack from how they feel and to look into the effect their actions are having, it will make it a lot easier for them to actually make a difference. To understand this, one could imagine how they feel when they experience the desire to eat something unhealthy. Fulfilling this desire might make them feel good in the short-term, but it won’t make them feel good in the long-term.
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If someone has been paying attention to the mainstream media recently, they may have heard them talk about the ‘fake’ news that is circulating. This has been a time when they have spoken about how a lot of what they see on social media, for instance, is not real news.
A Common Occurrence It has been said that what often takes place is that people read the title of an article and that’s as far as it goes. As to whether the content of the article is true or not is then irrelevant. When this takes place, it could be said that one will primarily share it because the title supports what they believe. One is then not going to feel the need to actually read the article, as the title will be the only thing that matters. A Big Effect Even so, what they share can end up having an effect on how their ‘friends’ perceive certain things. This could mean that they will share the same article, or they could simply accept what they see. It is then easy to see how much influence these kinds of articles can have online, and so it is not much of a surprise for the mainstream media to talk about it. After all, they exist to inform people about what is taking place in the world. The Alternative If they were to ignore what is taking place, they would be letting a lot of people down. What this comes down to is that so many people rely on the mainstream media to keep them up to date. It could then be said that the mainstream media have a lot of responsibility, and this might be something that they are only too aware of. Therefore, they are doing the right thing by bringing this to people’s attention. Turn a Blind Eye If they overlooked what is taking place, they would be indirectly supporting the people who are producing this kind of news. Now, it could be argued that people can think for themselves, so it wouldn’t be that bad. There is no denying this, but even though someone has the ability to think for themselves, it doesn’t mean that they always will. The average person might not want to use their energy in this way, and this can be why they look towards the mainstream media in the first place. A Difference In addition to this, not everyone is the same, and this is why some people will find it easier than others to think critically. This is not to say that someone can’t learn how to think critically, but that doesn’t mean they will. At the end of the day, there is a reason why they are described as the ‘fourth estate’; without the work that they do, the world wouldn’t be the same. One way of looking at this would be to say that everyone’s life would be a lot harder if it wasn’t for what they do. The List And if someone wants to find out what websites they will need to stay away from, they won’t need to put in a lot of effort. The reason for this is that a number of these sites have been listed for them. One could then become familiar with them and make sure they don’t read anything that they write about. The next step might be for them to share this information with their friends and family. Confusion Yet, while some people might go along with this, there are likely to be others who find it hard to believe. As a far as they are concerned, the mainstream media could also have the tendency to produce fake news. This doesn’t mean that these people believe everything that they hear about on social media though. It could just be normal for them to not accept everything that the mainstream media tells them. Another Source A number of the websites that have been listed are part of the alternative media, and one reason why these exist is due to the mainstream media not doing what they are supposed to do. Some of the people behind these news sources were probably fed up with what was taking place, and decided to take matters into their own hands. Clearly, some of these sites are there to send people down the wrong path, and to make them believe things that are not true. Still, to say that all of the alternative media sites out there are spreading lies would be the same as saying the mainstream media only tells the truth. For Example How the mainstream media behaved during the recent presidential election proves that they should also be on this list. During this election, their primary concern was getting Hillary into the white house, and this is why their coverage was so biased. The reason for this is that the people behind these sources were also funding her campaign. It was then vital for them ignore what was actually taking place and to create fake news in order to demonize trump and to elevate Hillary. Projection Therefore, if one was to step back, they might begin to think about how this shows that the mainstream media feels as though they are under threat. It is then not that they are just trying to warn others; it is that they are also trying to undermine other sources of information that are a taking their power away. What is taking place can be seen as similar to what can happen when someone is cheating on their partner, and ends up accusing their partner of cheating. Through disconnecting from how they feel, they can end up projecting their guilt onto their partner, and this can cause them to feel as though they have done something wrong. Conclusion After hearing the mainstream media talk about how concerned they are about fake news, one might believe that it is only is matter of time before a fast food chain will talk about how concerned they are about unhealthy food. Ultimately, it doesn’t matter what news source one is paying attention to, as they will still need to think for themselves.
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When it comes to what takes place in the world, it could be said that one has very little, if any, control. However, this is generally not going to be the case when it comes where they live.
In this environment, they are likely to have far more control, and the amount of control they have can depend on a number of different factors. For example, if they own their own house, it will be different to if they lived with someone else. Give and Take If they live with someone else, it is then not going to be possible for them to always do what they want. There are bound to be times when they will need to compromise. Therefore, it might not matter if they own the house, as there will still be moments when they will need to put their needs to one side. If the other person didn’t have their own needs, this would take place. The Neighbours Along with this, there may also be the needs of the people who live nearby, and these will need to be taken into consideration. If one was to live in the middle of nowhere, they might not have to worry about this. Yet, if they were to live in the same building as other people or in a house that is attached to another house, it will be different. The main thing that they will need to keep in mind could be to make sure they don’t make too much noise. The Other Side Nevertheless, while one could make sure that they think about their house mates needs if they live with someone else and the other person could do the same thing, it doesn’t mean that the people around them will be as considerate. They could have neighbours that are incredibly noisy. And even if they were to have a word with them, it doesn’t mean that anything will happen. In addition to this, they could live near to a main road, and they won’t be able to do anything about this. Pets If their neighbours were to have a cat or other animals that didn’t make a lot of noise, they are not going to have an effect on them. But if they were to have dogs, this could be another thing that will end up irritating them. If one was to share a house with someone who had a dog that made a lot of noise, it could be an even bigger problem. How this person behaves could be another thing that will make it harder for them to relax. Getting Away What this shows is that even if one was to step into where they live and to close the door on the world, it doesn’t mean that they will experience peace and quiet. There will be things they can do to change this and things that they can’t. One thing they could do if where they live is not right for them, is to move somewhere else. Through living in an environment that is not right for them, they will have a good idea of what they don’t want. Different Requirements One might be prepared to live near to a main road, but they might want to make sure that they don’t live around people who make a lot of noise. Or, one may prefer to live somewhere where they don’t need to worry about being quiet all the time. Ultimately, one will need to do everything they can do find the right place for them to live. As if they are unable to do this, it will be a lot harder for them to face the world each day. The Ideal But although some people will be able to put up with certain things, there will be others who can’t. The reason for this is that they will need to live in an environment where they can get away from everything. This is going to be due to how sensitive they are, and the prefect environment for them will be one where they can completely relax. Through being somewhere like this, they will be able to recharge their batteries, so to speak. An Analogy When they don’t live somewhere like this, it will be similar to how someone feels when they have a stone in their shoe. Instead of feeling comfortable when they put their foot down, they will end up experiencing more and more pain. In the same way, the longer one spends in this environment, the more drained they will feel. And what has a negative effect on their wellbeing could be overlooked by the average person. Highly Sensitive Person Even so, this doesn’t mean that there is something inherently wrong with them; it just shows that they are different. It is then going to be in their interest to make sure that they don’t live in a noisy environment. Living around people who are not moody or who have the tendency to experience drama will also be important. Through living in the right place, it will make it a lot easier for them function at their best. Awareness What one is aware of how sensitive they are, it will be a lot easier for them to thrive. Without this understanding, one could come to believe that it is because of something else and this could stop them from being able to improve their life. With the right understanding, they will be able to take care of their needs, and they won’t need to suffer unnecessarily. If one lives in the wrong environment, this is not going to be something that will change overnight, but the sooner they do something about it, the sooner their circumstances will change.
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Oliver JR Cooper http://www.oliverjrcooper.co.uk
If one was to think about someone who they talk to on social media, a number of different associations may come to mind. For example, they could think about how they care about the planet, or that they are very knowledge when it comes to a certain area, for instance.
There is also chance that this is someone who they regularly meet up with in the real world, and so their assessment won’t be only based on the kind of things they share online. How this person comes across online is then going to be no different to what they are like offline. Another Experience In addition to this, one could talk to a number of people on social media who they haven’t met for a long time. Even so, how they come cross online could be seen as what they are like in person. This could also apply to the people who they don’t talk to, and this could mean that one just pays attention to the kinds of things they share. What these people share is likely to have influenced how they see them. The Only Part It is then not going to matter what these people are like in person; the only thing that will matter is how they come across online. Now, there is the chance that they will come across in the same way if they were to meet them in person. The amount of time that has passed since they last saw them is not going to have an effect, as one will know what they are like. Through paying attention to what they share online, it will have stopped them from being out of touch with them. Disconnected If they didn’t use social media, it wouldn’t have been possible for them to know what these people are like. Of course, there is always the chance that they won’t change as the years go by, and this is then not going to matter. But, if they were to change and one was to meet them after so many years have passed, it could be like they were meeting people who they have never met before. The idea they had in their head would not have matched up with what they are like. A Mismatch However, while this is something that can take place when one doesn’t use social media, it can also occur if they do. In this case, one could find that how someone comes across in the real world doesn’t match up with what they are like online. If one was to spend a lot of time around them in the real world, they could be surprised by how they come across on social media. Yet, if they were to spend less time around them and more time online, how they behave in the real world could then be what shocks them. A Regular Occurrence Nevertheless, there could be a number of people who one is ‘friends’ with who they haven’t even met before. The way they perceive these people could be in line with what they are like, but it might not be. Simply paying attention to what they say and what they share is not going to allow them to realise if it is. The only way they will be able to find out is if they were to meet them in person. Projection Through meeting them in the real world, one could gradually begin to find out that their online identity is a true reflection of what they are like. Alternatively, one could believe that it is even though there is no real evidence to support this outlook. What this can come down to is that if one is caught up with what they are like online, it can stop them from being able to see what they are really like. Along with this, how they respond to them will also play a part. Support Without realising it, one can end up behaving in a way that will encourage the other person to behave in a certain way. This can then result in the other person behaving how one would expect them to. Or, if they were to experience something that goes against what they believe, they could just dismiss it. This shows how much control one’s mind has when it comes to how they experience life. Control With this in mind, one could start to think about how they could use social media to influence how people see them. When this is done in the right way, it can have a positive effect on their life. Not only can they use this to shape their image, they can also use it to give people an idea of what is important to them. Ergo, when someone does come into contact with them in the real world, there will be no reason for them to be short of things to talk to them about. Conclusion But with that aside, it could be said that unless one regularly meets someone in the real world, it might be a good idea for them to make sure they don’t get too caught up in how they come across online. This can allow them to keep an open mind, and they will be less likely to project the other person online identity onto them if they do meet them. What also needs to be kept in mind is that it is going to be normal for someone to only share their best side online, and to keep the other parts of them hidden. When this takes place, one’s idea of them is going to be out of balance.
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Oliver JR Cooper http://www.oliverjrcooper.co.uk/ Free Speech: Do Some People Try To Silence Others Because They Can't Handle Their Own Emotions?20/11/2016
While someone could experience a negative reaction if another person was to say something bad about them, this could also take place if they were to express their views. As a result of this, it could be a challenge for them to feel at peace within.
No Escape One could then spend time with people who respect them, but that doesn’t mean that they will always appreciate being in their company. This could be a time when these people will listen to what they have to say and give them positive feedback. In fact, they could be the kind of friends that most people would want to have in their life. Ever so, if one of them was to say something that they don’t agree with, their inner world could soon change. The Same Based on how they respond, it could be as if one of their friends has said something bad about them. Thus, it is not going to matter if they around people who treat well or people who don’t, as their experience is likely to be the same. And if someone nearby was to pay attention to what his taking place, they could come to the conclusion that they are with someone who is abusive, for instance. Yet, due to how they have reacted, this is not much of a surprise. One Approach At first, this could have been something that irritated their friends, but as time has passed, they might have learnt to tread carefully. Instead of being able to be themselves, they would have ended up putting on an act. Whenever they get together, their conversations could stay at a certain level and/or only cover certain topics. At the same time, a number of their friends could have ended up walking away. Restricted To be in their company could be seen as being more trouble than it is worth, and they might prefer to be around people who are not as sensitive. This will then allow them to be themselves, as opposed to having to walk on egg shells all the time. Having said that, a number of people in their life could be just the same, and this can mean that they will enjoy being in their company. Still, one could find that there are moments when these people offend them. Another Area The people in their life are unlikely to be the only ones who have this effect on them; what they see online could also have an impact on them. One could go on social media, and before long, they could soon feel angry or upset. This could relate to what one of their ‘friends’ has said, or it could be a sign that they have looked through what other people have been saying about a certain video or article. What this comes down to is that there is going to be no shortage of things for them to be offended about. The Real World When it comes to their day to-day-life, there could be plenty of things for them get worked up over. If they were to travel somewhere by bus or train, some of the things that other people talk about could annoy them. And if they were to come across any billboards or posters during this time, their emotional state could soon change. The only way for them to feel at peace might be for them to go to go the middle of nowhere. On The Inside However, although there won’t be anything on the outside that will offend them, they will still have to deal with what is taking place within them. As there are no external distractions, their mind could bring up all the things that have recently had an effect on them. If they are able to calm their mind down, they will soon be at peace, but if they are unable to do so, they might feel the need to go back to where they were. One reason for this is that being offended by so many things could have also have a positive effect on them. Two Sides On one side, there will be the ‘negative’ emotions that they experience, and this will take a lot out of them. As if they rarely responded to life in this way, they may find that they have more energy. On the other side, experiencing life in this way can give one a sense of being morally superior. This is because one can see themselves as being someone who is able to recognise when people are behaving in a harmful manner. Making a Difference Through being able to see when something is offensive, it gives them the ability to do something about it. Therefore, if someone doesn’t experience life in the same way as they do, it can be seen as a sign that they don’t have the same level of awareness. When someone offends them in some way, they could end up doing everything they can to silence them. In their eyes, this could be seen as the only solution to what is taking place. A Number of Approaches If someone online has offended them, they could try to have been banned, or they could do everything they can to tarnish their image. It is clear that one will have a lot of control online. When it comes to the real world, one might still try to destroy their image, and they could use social media do to this. Another thing they could do is to try to get them banned from certain places, or see if they can get them sacked from their job, among other things. Control One way of looking at this is to say that one is not just trying to control what other people say; they are also trying to control their life. Through doing this, they will no longer offend other people, and one can then feel as though they have achieved something. Yet, if one was able to take a step back and to reflect on their behaviour, they might begin to see why they are behaving in this way. This could be a time when they will see that they are unable to handle their own emotions and, through silencing others, it makes it easier for them to feel at peace. A Closer Look It is then not going to be possible for them to try to silence others for a few days and then carry on with their life; it will have to be a regular occurrence. If they don’t do this, their inner world is likely to be in complete disarray. Their inability to regulate their own emotions could be due to what took place during their childhood years. Perhaps this was a time when they didn’t receive the attunement that they needed in order to develop this ability. Awareness When one tries to silence others, they are going to do everything they can to stop them from being able to express their views. And through being so caught up in this, one can be oblivious to the fact that it might only be a matter of time before they are silenced. Another option would be for them to develop the ability to handle their own emotions, and they might then find that they no longer need to control what other people say. This can take place with the assistance of a therapist.
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Oliver JR Cooper http://www.oliverjrcooper.co.uk
When it came to who one would talk to in the past, it would have generally related to the people they knew. This probably would have been their friends and family, and the people who they came into contact with in their day-to-day life.
In addition to this, there could have been the people who called them up in order to try and sell them something. Other than that, those they spoke to on the phone would have typically been people they had spoken to in person. It’s All Changed However, in today’s world it can be normal for one to speak to people they don’t know, and this can take place without talking to someone over the phone or being around anyone. This is due to what they can do on social media. Not only can they have ‘friends’ who they haven’t met before, there will also be millions of people who they can engage with who are not their ‘friends’. And, in a lot of cases, one will never meet these people in the real world. Anonymous This can come down to the fact that they live on the other side of the planet, and so it could be highly unlikely that their paths will ever cross. Yet, the same could also be said even if they were to live in the same country. What can also play a here is if the people they talk don’t show their face, and it is then not going to matter where they live. One could then be talking to someone who is the same room as them and they wouldn’t know. Growth As result of being able to speak to people from all over the world, it could be seen as a great way for them to expand their own mind. This is not to say that one can only learn through sharing their views, as this is not the case. The only thing that they need to do is to read other peoples comments, and this will give them the chance to see what other people’s views are. Now, if one was to treat people in a respectful manner in the real world, they could have the same approach online. A Civil Conversation Therefore, whether they talk to people they know or to people they don’t know, they are not going to have the need to put them down. This doesn’t mean that they will agree with everything they read; what it means is that they will see that the other person is a fellow human being. When they don’t agree with what has been said, they could state their opinion, or they could simply move on. One could realise that even if they were to prove what someone has said is not accurate, it doesn’t mean that they will accept this. Evidence It would be easy to believe that once someone has been shown the reason why their perspective is not accurate that they would change their mind. This sounds logical, but this is rarely how life works. Ultimately, human beings are emotional beings, and this is why their mind can end up being put to one side. What is taking place at an emotional level is then going to define their behaviour. A Waste of Time On a number of occasions, they may have spoken to someone online who was too caught up in their emotions to accept new information. It would then have been better for them to move on and to use their time to do something more productive. And what would have caused them to believe that someone was too emotional would have been how they responded. This could have been a time when they started to call them names, or to label them in some way. Behind A Screen If someone was to behave in this way online, it could be how they behave in the real world. As a result of this, social media won’t have had much of an effect on their behaviour; if anything, it has given them a bigger platform. At the same time, how someone behaves online could be radically different to what they are like offline. Through being at a safe distance from others, another side of them ends up being revealed. An Analogy How they respond to what someone else has said is then going to be similar to what happens when a sports team is unable to accept defeat. Instead of being able to see that is it only game, they can end up attacking the other team. It has then gone from being a time when two teams were putting their sporting ability to the test, to a time when one team has taken it personally. Sportsmanship has gone out the window, and one team’s primitive nature has come to the fore. Slander When this happens on social media, what they talk about will drop from the level of intellectual discussion, and move into the realm of personal attack. It is then going to be irrelevant as to what the topic is, as they will do everything they can to tarnish the other persons image. Out of Control What this can show is that is it not possible for them to regulate their emotions, and this is why they are unable to behave in a civilised manner. Their emotions are in control of them and it is not possible for them to think clearly. One could even believe that other people are in control of how they feel, and they could then see their behaviour as being justified. Either way, trying to destroy someone’s image will be a way for them to settle themselves down. Conclusion If one was to come across someone like this, it might be best for them to simply move on from the conversation. Trying to get through to them could be waste of time, and it will be better for them to use their time and energy in a more productive way. Having said that, this can all depend on what is being said about them and the amount of exposure that it receives. In some cases, it might be necessary for them to seek out the right legal support.
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Oliver JR Cooper http://www.oliverjrcooper.co.uk
When someone talks to people over social media, it is not going to be the same as talking to them in person. It could be said that this is pretty obvious, and that it is not something that needs to be pointed out.
What this primarily comes down to is that one is going to be using a device to talk to people. Through being in front of a screen, the people they are talking to could be miles away from them. Another Way As a result of this, they will have to connect with people by writing, sharing videos and uploading pictures, amongst other things. Thus, even though this is going to be different to having face-to-face interactions with people, they are not going to be short of ways to get their point across. In fact, one could find that it is far easier for them to express themselves online that is for them to do so offline. One can also take their time when it comes to what they say, and this can allow them to say the right thing. No Holding Back The kinds of things they talk about to their ‘friends’ online could be the same as what they say to them offline. However, there is the chance that they will find it easier to open up when they are in front of a screen. Therefore, if it wasn’t for social media, they could have the tendency to hold everything in. This is not going to be good for their wellbeing, and it could cause them to feel cut-off from others. One Problem This could be something that will surprise a lot of people; especially if they have come to believe that social media encourages loneliness. But while this outlook can sound accurate, it is clearly not this black and white. If anything, social media can stop people from feeling isolated from others, and this can only be a good thing. So, regardless of whether one doesn’t have many friends or has friends but doesn’t feel comfortable talking about certain things, using social media can have a positive effect on them. A Time and A Place Still, the kind of conversations that one has online are not going to replace face-to-face- interactions; in the same way that supplements are not going to replace real food. It is then going to be vital for them to make sure they take the time to interact with real people. Once again, this could be seen as something that is clear, but that doesn’t mean that it is not something that can end up being overlooked from time to time. Due to how easy it is to get hooked into social media, one could end up spending more time on there than they spend with real people. The Key At the end of the day, it all comes down to having the right balance, and what is right for one person wont necessary be right for another. For one thing, some people need more stimulation than others, and so they will need to spend more time around others. Along with this, one could be going through a challenging time and this could make them want to spend more time by themselves. Going online can then be more appealing than spending time around others. A Number of Similarities But while taking to people over social media is not the same as taking to them in person, it would be inaccurate to say that it is completely different. One could still have the need to behave in the same way as they do in the real world. They could also feel the need to say the right thing, and to make sure that they don’t offend anyone. Based on how they respond, it could be said that it is as if they are surrounded by real people. Freedom of Expression Naturally, there are going to be some people who say whatever they want online and don’t care about what other people think. This could mean that they are like this in the real world, or it might not. But for the people who are hesitant when it comes to sharing their views, social media can be somewhere where they are unable to be themselves. In the same way that they can have the need to keep themselves in line in the real world, the same thing can take place online. Groupthink One thing that could take place is that one could end up going along with what other people say. Out of their need to fit in, it could cause them to cast their own views to one side, or they might not even take the time to develop their own views. What other people say online could be accepted and internalised, and it is then not going to matter how true it is. The part of them that is only interested in their survival is going to be in control. A Number of Different Consequences This means that the part of them that has the desire to find out what is true and what isn’t is going to be offline. At times, this might not have much of an effect on how they perceive life. For example, if someone was to say that a certain man/woman is the most attractive person on the planet and one was to just agree with them, it is unlikely to lead to a negative outcome. On the other hand, this is not going to be the case if one was to have the same approach when it comes choosing a presidential candidate, for instance. Conclusion Through being aware of how easy it is to go along with what other people think, it can give one the chance to take a step back. If they were to speak up when they disagreed with something, it could cause them to be attacked. Ultimately, it doesn’t matter whether one keeps their views to themselves or speaks up; what matters is that they dont allow themselves to blindly accept other people’s views. As just because a lot people think something is true or accurate, it doesn’t mean that this is the case.
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Oliver JR Cooper http://www.oliverjrcooper.co.uk |
Oliver JR CooperAuthor of 26 books, Transformational Writer, Teacher & Consultant. Introductory Consultation
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Disclaimer
That which is contained within these articles is based on my own empirical understanding and is true for me at the time they were written. However, as I continue to grow, what I perceive as the truth will inevitably change and as a result of this - parts of these articles may not reflect my current outlook.
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