While there are some people who experience anxiety from time to time, there are others who experience it on a regular basis. There is then going to be a big difference when it comes to their day-to-day life.
Now, if one doesn’t have anxiety problems, they could end up seeing themselves as the exception. What this comes down to is that they may have heard a lot about people who suffer from anxiety in the media.
In addition to this, they may know a number of people who also have the same problem. As a result of this, they might wonder why this is something that effects so many people.
The Right Time
When it comes to the moments when they experience anxiety, they might know why this is taking place. For example, if one was to start a new job or if they had an exam, this is something that may arise.
Consequently, one can make sure that they prepare themselves in the right way; whereas if they didn’t feel this way, it could stop this from taking place. In this case, what is taking place within them is serving them.
So, through being anxious, it will enable them to be aware of things that they wouldn’t have been aware of otherwise. And once they are aware of what they need to do, they can take the appropriate action.
In the short-term, it can cause them to feel uncomfortable but, in the long-term, it is likely to have a positive effect on their life. Once whatever they were preparing for has passed, they could soon settle back down again.
What this is going to mean is that they are not going to feel on edge when they are around their friends, or when they are around others. It will be possible for them to be in the moment and to express their true-self.
One will be in touch with their true needs and feelings, and there will be no reason for them to please others. And through being at ease around others, it will allow them to respond as opposed to react.
Part of Life
If one was to think about how they experience life, there is the chance that they have been this way for as long as they can remember. This can then be something that they just take for granted.
On the other hand, they might not have been this way for very long. One is then going to be only too aware of what it is like to suffer from anxiety, and this could cause them to feel grateful for how their life is.
If they were to think about how their life used to be, they might struggle to relate to it. Thus, even though they still live on the same planet, it could be as if they have gone to another one.
But while this will be how one now experiences life, there are going to be plenty of others who won’t be able to relate to this. There will be how they have experienced life in the past and how they continue to experience it.
In the example above, one is generally going to experience anxiety when it is appropriate, but when it comes to someone who doesn’t experience life in this way; they can experience it when it is not appropriate. It is then not that one is just experiencing anxiety; it can be as if they have been completely consumed by it.
This will be the difference between someone experiencing pain in one area of their body and their whole body being in pain. So, when they experience anxiety, it is going to cause them to lose themselves.
It won’t matter if they have an exam coming up or an interview, as they will still feel the same. What they could find is that they usually feel on edge when they are around other people.
There can be the effect this has on them when they are around their friends and family, and the impact it has on them when they are around strangers. It is then irrelevant as to whether one actually knows someone or not.
Point of Focus
Through being this way around others, it is likely to cause them to disconnect from their needs and feelings. Their primary concern will probably be to make sure that they don’t do anything that will displease others.
This is going to stop them from being able to behave how they want; they will need to monitor their behaviour at all times. A few people might know who they are, while the rest may only know the role that they play.
Naturally, being on guard so often is going to cause them to use a lot of energy. They may find that the only time they are able to relax is when they are in their own company.
Having said that, this could be a time when their mind is out of control, and it is then not going to be much different. One way of looking at what they are going through would be to say that one needs to settle their mind down.
This would be based on the outlook that one’s thoughts are in control of how they feel. Therefore, if they change what is taking place in their head, they will gradually be able to feel more at peace.
If one was to take a look at what is taking place in their mind, they may find that they fear that other people will reject them. There will be people who don’t accept them, but that doesn’t mean that they have to allow these people to define their life.
A Deeper Look
Another approach would be for them to get in touch with that is taking place in their body, and this could be a time when they will feel rejected in their chest. It will then be inaccurate to say that they fear being rejected, as they already feel this way.
If they were to go deeper and to see what is underneath this feeling, they could find that they feel worthless just above their stomach. And if they feel worthless, they can believe that other people will abandon them if they find out how flawed they are (and one can also feel this feeling in their chest).
What this will then show is that even though they have anxiety problems, this is just what is taking place on the surface. In order for one to change their life, it will be necessary for them to deal with what is taking place at a deeper level.
Ultimately, one is going to be carrying trauma, and this could be due to what took place when they were younger. Perhaps this was a time when they were abused and/or neglected by their caregiver/s.
If one can relate to this and they want to change their life, they may need to work with a therapist or a healer.
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Oliver JR Cooper
Oliver JR Cooper
Author of 26 books, Transformational Writer, Teacher & Consultant.
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That which is contained within these articles is based on my own empirical understanding and is true for me at the time they were written. However, as I continue to grow, what I perceive as the truth will inevitably change and as a result of this - parts of these articles may not reflect my current outlook.