When it comes to what one attracts and doesn’t attract into their life, thoughts are often the primary focus. And when someone has this point of view, they are seen as the key to one attracting what they want and repelling what they don’t want. So here, one needs to become hyper vigilant when it comes to their thoughts and to constantly create thoughts that are ‘positive’. And through this process, it is said that one will create feelings that reflect their thought processes. This then creates the impression that the mind is in control of what one feels or doesn’t feel. And that how one feels is always a consequence of what one is thinking. Communication is therefore only occurring one way; from the head down and not from the body up. If one has feelings that are not related to what they are thinking about, then that is said to be due to them having thoughts that they are not aware of. And as their awareness increases, they will be able to notice the thoughts and therefore stop themselves from having the feelings. The Head This creates the impression that the ones point of focus needs to be on what is going on in their head. And through placing ones attention on this part, they will gradually begin to master their personal reality. Thoughts are then incredibly important and one will need to become almost obsessed with what they are thinking or not thinking. To ignore them could lead to minor problems and what could be described as major calamities. Along with thoughts, are ones beliefs and these are often said to create the thoughts that one has and therefore their feelings. And these exist in one’s mind also, but not in ones conscious mind, their unconscious mind. The Body What this would mean then, is that the body is simply an effect of what is taking place in one’s head. The head is the master and the body is the servant. If this is true and the body is nothing more than a lump of meat that is being controlled by what’s going on in the head, then it is irrelevant. To ignore what is going on in one’s body and to place ones awareness firmly in their head would be the obvious thing to do. And based on conventional wisdom, why would one think any different. The problem here is that conventional wisdom is not always accurate and just because one wants something to be true and ‘believes’ that is it, it doesn’t mean that it is. Feelings What is often heard when it comes to creating one’s life, is that one’s thoughts create their feelings. What this misses out is the fact what while thoughts can create how one feels, they can also work the other way round. So how one thinks is a result of how they are feeling. And thoughts are needed to create these feelings in the first place. The reason for this is that feelings exist in the body and the mind then interprets these feelings and produces thoughts and beliefs. And these feelings are what create the resonance that defines what one attracts into their life and what they repel. The thoughts that one has are generally nothing more than a reflection of how one feels and rarely the other way around. Trapped Emotions The feelings and emotions that are in one’s body could have been there since one was a baby. They could be the result of what has happened during ones adult years, but is it what takes place in the beginning of one’s life that often has the biggest impact on ones reality. In these moments, one could have had an experience that was extremely traumatic or accumulation of minor experiences that built up and had the same effect over time. And these can include the following feelings: hopelessness, powerlessness, worthlessness, helplessness, shame, guilt and fear, amongst others. If these emotions and feelings were mirrored and allowed to be released, they would have disappeared. But when this doesn’t happen, they end up being trapped in one’s body. Attraction Time will pass and the intellectual brain in one’s head will become conditioned and ‘educated’ by society and they are likely to lose all connection to what is going on in their body. But even though one can have no awareness of these feelings and emotions in their body, it doesn’t mean that they are not having an effect on one’s life. These trapped feeling and emotions will define what one attracts into their life and what they repel. So the people they are attracted to and the people they attract will all reflect what is going on in their body. Consequences When one is cut off from their body and primarily operates form their head, it will be normal for one to come to the conclusion that life is just happening to them. And that they are simply observing what is or is not showing up. This is part of the duality: the mind observes life and the body experiences life. And as the same feelings and emotions are trapped in one’s body, one is going to create the same reality. If one is on reverse, they won’t go forward unless they change gear. Breaking The Pattern In order for one to break the patterns in their life and to create a new reality, it will be essential for them to release these trapped feelings and emotions. When they are not released, the same reality will appear and this will just validate the beliefs and thoughts that their mind has. And new feelings and emotions that are created from the new experiences in their life will pile on top of the original feelings. Awareness What can make this such a challenge is that one has to detach from what is showing up in their life and what is taking place within them; to react to it will only cause one to be a slave and to remain stuck. It is also important to realise that life is impersonal; it is responding to what one is resonating. And when things are not going to plan or when one is attracting what they don’t want, it is natural to get angry and frustrated. But to remain this way in the long one won’t lead to progress. The mind will feel validated and yet what is showing up is a result of what is going on in one’s body. The trapped feelings and emotions can be released with the assistance of a therapist or a healer. As these are released, ones reality will change and their thoughts and beliefs will follow suit.
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There could be said to be two ways that one can be harmed in this world. One of these is through external means and what other people do to them. And the other is what one does to themselves. What goes on externally can be noticed and as it is observable to others, they can come to ones assistance and put an end to what is happening. The same approach is not always possible when it comes to the harm that is being committed internally. Other people are not always aware of this form of violence and so this can end up going unnoticed. However, there are exceptions in both cases. So while external violence is visible and able to be observed, it doesn’t mean that it is always picked up by people or that anything is done about it. And just because the violence that is going on within is not as observable, it doesn’t mean that other people don’t pick up on it. Or that there are not clear signs that show someone is harming themselves. Different Types This comes down to the fact that there are different types of self harm; with some of these ways being subtle and some of them being more extreme. As a result of this, self harm can go on without other people knowing. And one can even harm themselves without even knowing. If one is physically harming themselves, other people may become aware of the self harm. However, one could cover this up through wearing certain types of clothes or by coming up with different reasons as to why they have a cut or a bruise for instance. Whereas what goes on in this persons mind, through how they talk to themselves, is not likely to be picked up by other people. What they may do is pick it up indirectly, through how this person behaves; if they are close enough to this person and have a good awareness. A Mystery So the people that one is close to, from their friends, colleagues and family, can all be oblivious to what is occurring. One could hide what is going on for them as a way to avoid being labelled in a certain way. And to stop themselves from being rejected, abandoned or experiencing a heighted level of shame. But at the same time, this outlook could simply exist in their mind. As certain people around them could end up being supportive and only too happy to do whatever they can to enable this person to move on from this challenge. Other people can then be what appear to stop one from moving beyond this and yet it can be what is going on in their own mind that is sabotaging the process of reaching out for assistance and support. Self Harm While self harm can range from what is subtle and to what is extreme, there are also many ways in which one can harm themselves. To harm ones physical body in some way is a common example. And some of these ways will be seen as self harm, but then there are others that won’t be. These ways are more socially accepted versions and as a result, they can go on without being noticed. So although one type of harm is being channelled into another type and one is still harming themselves; they can end up feeling more at ease. Other options can include: extreme sports, exercise, tattoos, eating, drinking, relationships and sex, amongst other things. Conscious And Unconscious What can define how one harms themselves is how conscious they are of what is going on within them and if they are more introverted or extroverted. One person may just go along with their feelings and thoughts and become consumed by them. Another person may deny how they feel and end up being drawn to external forms of self harm. In this case, one doesn’t physically harm their own body themselves; they do it through external means. Here, one has no self awareness and pushes their body to do all kinds of things that are potentially dangerous. A Way Of Life To have moments where one feels worthless, guilty or ashamed is relatively normal. But these are just moments and are likely to pass before long. So through feeling this way, one may wonder why they did or didn’t do something and go onto having an emotional experience. And this momentary experience could cause someone to engage in self harm. However, this will soon pass and one will return to their normal state of being. When it comes to someone who self harms on a regular basis, they are unable to move on and are emotionally stuck. Trapped Emotions This could relate to what they have experienced in their adult years and go back to what happened to them as child. And as these feelings and emotions were not dealt with at the time, one will have become emotionally stuck at these moments. The experiences they have had as an adult or when they were children would have caused them to feel certain emotions and feelings. These could be: anger, hate, rage, worthlessness, emptiness, helplessness, powerless, shame, guilt and fear. These feelings then create the need for an emotional release and one will use self harm as a way to regulate how they feel. What these options will do is last for a short time, but what they won’t do is deal with the feelings and emotions on a long term basis. So they are short term solutions at best and this is why one will continually feel the need to harm themselves. Awareness When these trapped feelings and emotions are released from one’s body, one will have no reason to harm themselves. And this is because they will no longer feel the same and as a result of this, self harm won’t be necessary This can be done with the assistance of a therapist or a healer who will allow one to face their trapped feelings and emotions and release them.
If someone is behaving in a certain way or not attracting what they want into their life, it is often said to be a result of what their beliefs are. And so one then needs to change what they believe, in order to act differently and to attract what they want into their reality. A large part of the self development industry is focused on beliefs and there have been many techniques and methods created to change beliefs. Some of these approaches have been around for many, many years and others are fairly recent inventions or what could be described as a blend of previous ways. The Mind This means that one’s primary focus is on what is going on in the mind and not what is taking place within one’s body. The mind is where beliefs are found and where thoughts, ideas, assumptions, expectations and associations are formed. So the mind is not directly involved with the here and now, if anything, it supply’s feedback to what is taking place. For when one is in the moment, there is no feedback or ideas about reality. One is consumed by the moment and has no need to formulate any ideas. An Analogy In recent years, cameras have become an essential part of most people’s lives. And technology has continued to advance, so they are getting not only smaller, but also cheaper. This has opened them up to more people and through having them on phones; pictures can be taken during any moment that one has the urge to take them. However, photos are not life itself, they are copies of life. And this is reflects the difference between the mind and the body. The body is the experience, the mind is the picture. In the first one, there is complete engaged with reality; whereas the other is a by-product or a consequence of it. The Body To be in the body, is to be at one with life and everything that is taking place in this moment. There is no past or future in the body, all there is, is now. So in the body’s natural state, there is no holding on. The mind on the other hand holds on, as holding on is seen as essential to ones survival. What one is holding onto is what is familiar and what is familiar is what is safe. So from this point of view, to let go would mean death. And taking pictures, as mentioned in the example above, is a way for the mind to hold onto an experience. The body has no need to believe or disbelieve anything. But the mind is constantly forming interpretations based on what it experiences and what is doesn’t experience. However, the mind can stop the body form expressing certain feelings and emotions. Feelings So whereas the mind responds to reality in one way, the body responds to it in another way. And this is through: feelings, emotions and sensations. These are ones first point of experience. Before one even thinks, believes or forms ideas about life, feelings are what first appear. And this is true when one is a baby and when they are an adult. And yet, if one is cut off from their body and lives in their head, it can seem as though what is going on in their mind is causing what is going on in their body. This that really encapsulates this -‘’although many of us may think of ourselves as thinking creatures that feel, biologically we are feeling creatures that think” - Jill Bolte Taylor. The Truth Through how one feels in their body, the mind then interprets those feelings to mean certain things. And to the mind, these interpretations will be taken as the truth about reality, oneself and others. To the mind there is no middle ground or grey area. So these will be taken as absolute truths; even though they are simply ideas about life. Ideas that can be proven as accurate or inaccurate, depending on what one focuses on. Beliefs So something can happen in one’s life and this causes their body to create certain feelings and emotions; the mind will then take this to mean something. And these meanings will become beliefs. This could relate to what has happened during ones adult years and go back to when one was a child; with these moments being mildly or extremely traumatic. If one felt safe enough to express how they felt or if there was a caregiver around to sooth and mirror them, in the case of a child, there might be no reason for beliefs to be formed. But if these feelings and emotions are denied and covered up, then beliefs will inevitable form. These beliefs can cover everything from: whether people can be trusted; if one is likeable or not; if one deserves to have money; healthy relationships; if the world is a safe place and numerous others. There are ultimately no limits to what the mind can believe or disbelief; there are infinite potentials. Sometimes these beliefs can aid one’s life and at others times, they can limit it and even destroy it. Reality Although beliefs are just that, beliefs, they will then define what one experiences and doesn’t experience. They will become the fabric of one personal reality. And whatever doesn’t correspond with these beliefs in one’s mind, will be filtered out. Because the mind is constantly looking for what which it believes to be true. So if something is not seen as the truth, one is unlikely to experience it in their reality. It will always seem out of their grasp and one could end up seeing themselves as unlucky, unfortunate or even victimised. Trapped Feelings One way would be to change these beliefs and that may work for some people. Another way would be to release the trapped feelings and emotions in one’s body. And as this takes place, ones reality will change and the mind will have no choice but to change the beliefs that is has created. What one attracts and doesn’t attract will change, and this includes people, circumstances and areas of materialism. The mind will have a different reality to observe and no reason to believe the same things. Self Fulfilling Prophecy In some cases, if these beliefs were changed, the same reality would still be created. And this is because the feelings that are creating ones reality are still there and have not been faced and released. So one would create the same reality and yet more beliefs would be formed and then added to the ones that already exist. And the more beliefs that one picks up, the harder it will be to see otherwise and the more one is likely to attract what corresponds to the beliefs. One could end up being trapped in a cycle that doesn’t seem to end. A bit like cutting of a weed and before long it soon grows back. To stop this process, one needs to go to the root of the weed. And in this case, the root relates to the trapped feelings in one’s body Awareness If one is stuck in their head, it might be necessary to deal with the beliefs for a while. At least until they can become the observers of their mind. Once one has developed their ability to observe their mind and to not get caught up by it in most cases, then they will be able to get into their body. Once a connection to their body has been formed and they are aware of what they feeling, the assistance of a therapist or a healer may be required. Here one will be supported in getting in touch with their trapped feelings and emotions and gradually releasing them
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Oliver JR CooperAuthor of 26 books, Transformational Writer, Teacher & Consultant. Introductory Consultation
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Disclaimer
That which is contained within these articles is based on my own empirical understanding and is true for me at the time they were written. However, as I continue to grow, what I perceive as the truth will inevitably change and as a result of this - parts of these articles may not reflect my current outlook.
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