What I mean by this, is are we actually having an effect on our reality or environment or are we just bystanders in life, watching as situations and circumstances just ‘randomly’ happen, without us having any influence or control.
Without even looking at whether this perception is right or wrong at the moment, it is easy to see that the potential consequences of perceiving life this way are not exactly empowering. Under this perception we can feel like a victim, lose all hope in life and feel that there is nothing we can do.
Based on my experiences and awareness, I don’t believe that we are just the observers of our reality, far from it in fact.
It is easy to see that many areas in our society are created around this perception that life just happens. And if that perception feels right for an individual, then so be it. However, if we want to live an empowered life, a life of true fulfilment, believing in such a thing won’t do much for us.
When it comes to examples of this perception we don’t need to look very far. With the latest craze being adverts offering compensation for ‘accidents’ ‘that are not our fault’, to the media’s obsession of representing everyone as victims and even how we are always at the mercy of our DNA, are just a few examples. We can become totally consumed in the idea that we have no control over our lives. And of course, the more attention we give to such perceptions the more validation we find to support this and the more disempowered we become.
What helps to support and maintain this kind of perspective is how our ego works in polarities. So it leads us to view the world in absolutes. The media is also a great example of this black or white view of life. If I was to say that the world is perfect, I would generally be seen to be in denial of life, however the media is constantly trying to sell us the complete opposite of this view, with the whole world being a mess. And we can, through time, start to believe it is so.
One of the ways that we can become disempowered by the media is through the way they represent someone else’s experience of reality as being the truth, and how it would seem that the whole world has the same problems. Now this can be very appealing to our ego, as, if everyone (according to the media) has the same problem then it can’t have anything to do with us. This leads to us not only feel incredibly hopeless and disempowered, it also is a great way for our ego to avoid taking responsibility. So it could be said that the media validates our problems and help’s to prolong our struggles.
One of my perspectives as to the causes of feeling like a victim is by becoming dissociated from ourselves that we can then become completely external and through this lose our inner awareness. By this I mean that our ability to monitor and observe our own mind disappears. So instead of recognising and seeing the patterns in our mind are becoming projections in the outside world, we become caught up by those very projections. And we can then become consumed by the dramas of life and end up living a life not dissimilar to a soap opera.
I believe that one of the reasons for this is very often due to pain it is often easier, in the short term, to place our attention outside of ourselves. This is a defence mechanism and something that is incredibly important to function in the world. The problems can arise when we are constantly looking outside of ourselves, and as a result no inner awareness is possible. This is when it becomes a feedback loop, and we become completely overwhelmed by not only our internal reality but our external reality also.
However the very act of being disempowered can have a positive effect for the ego, as strange as this sound’s. Let me explain, when we lose or should I say temporarily lose our ability to observe ourselves; we end up living our life through our ego. It could be said that the ego will do everything it can to avoid responsibility. This is due to the nature of the ego and how part of its function is to use defence mechanisms. To me defence mechanisms are a way for us to escape being responsible temporarily, from what is being experienced, as it is too much for us to handle. The trap arises when we live a life of being perpetually in defence mechanisms, instead of looking at what is going on and through that process taking accountability or responsibility.
Yet observing ourselves, is probably one of the hardest things we will ever do, but like all things the more we do it the easier it becomes. And as we do this we come to realise that we are not our mind; we are actually the observer of our mind. Through this gentle and gradual process, we will become more and more aware, that we are indeed having an effect on our reality.
We will begin to see that although our feelings, emotions, thoughts, beliefs and perceptions are not visible to the naked eye, they are having a powerful effect on every part of our life.
As we create more of an inner harmony; our external world will always reflect this. One of the results of experiencing greater awareness of ourselves is that we will start to realise our true power. I believe we will only come to understand how powerful we are to the degree that we are ready to truly experience our power.
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Oliver J R Cooper
Oliver JR Cooper
Author, Transformational Writer & Coach - With Over 1,712,000 Article Views Online.
I also offer coaching via Skype and email. To find out more, click here.
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A Dialogue With The Heart - Part Two
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