Blame: It Is Normal For Someone To Blame Others When They Feel Powerless?

If one stays up to date with what is taking place in the world, they may have heard about people who blame others for what is taking place in their life. Along with this, they may have heard about certain groups that blame other groups for the challenges in their life.

The Norm

When this takes place, one group can believe that anyone who has a certain skin colour is at fault. So, it is then not that a few people will be seen as the problem; it will relate to a whole race.

Still, this could be something that one has been aware of for so long that it no longer has much of an effect on them. What they could believe is that this is just part of the modern day world and that there is not a lot that they can do.

A Closer Look

Alternatively, they could wonder why an individual or a group of people would behave in this way. One might believe that regardless of whether it relates to one person or a group, there are likely to be a number of similarities.

And in addition to what they hear about in the mainstream media, there is going to be what they have experienced in their own life. In fact, they may even know people who behave in this way.

Lopsided

There is the chance that one used to behave in this way, and this may mean that they will have a deeper understanding of what is taking place. Either way, what is likely to stand out is that these people are not willing to take responsibility for their own life.

When someone has the tendency to blame others, everything that happens to them is going to be seen as being out of their control. They are then going to be nothing more than an observer of their life.

The Evidence

While an outsider might be able to see what part this person is playing when it comes to what is taking place in their life, it is not going to be possible for them to do the same. One is likely to have a clear idea as to why they are nothing more than a victim.

They might start to think about all the reasons why they have ended up in this position, and how there was nothing that they could do about it. It will be as if the odds have always been stacked against them and this can be seen as something that is unlikely to change.

Support

Yet, even though there will be people who don’t validate how they perceive life, there are going to be others who do. What they believe is then going to be backed up by these people.

One could believe that this shows that they are right, and that these people actually care about them. The approval that they receive is then going to have a positive effect on how they feel.

A Hidden Agenda

However, even though someone will act as though they care about them, it doesn’t mean that this is the case. What it can show is that they see them as a means to an end, and what the end is can all depend on what position they hold in society.

If, for example, a politician shows their support to an individual or a group, it can show that they are using them to gain power. After all, the last thing that most politicians want is for people to stand on their own two feet.

Two Sides

When one blames someone else for what is taking place in their life, they are likely to feel good. Along with feeling strong and powerful, they can feel as though they have the moral high ground.

The downside to this is that even though they can feel better, it might not be long until their mood changes; if they are able to go of their anger that is. When this happens, they can end up falling right down.

A Flawed Approach

With the help of their anger, they will probably end up rising up again, and then the whole process will play out once again. Therefore, there will be ups and there will be plenty of downs, too.

But no matter what kind of ups they get through behaving in this way, their life would be far better if they stopped blaming others and took responsibility. The trouble is that if they were to longer blame others, they would have to face their true feelings.

Rock Bottom

If they were to get in touch with how they feel at a deeper level, they may find that they feel completely powerless. Thus, the reason why they blame other people for what is taking place in their life is because they truly believe that they are responsible for what happens to them.

One is then going to have two options: to feel powerless, or to blame others and to experience a sense of control. What this can show is that there was a time in their life when they were powerless.

A Deeper Look

This might relate to what took place when they were younger; perhaps this was a time when they were abused and/or neglected. As a result of this, they would have experienced a lot of pain and trauma.

Physically one will look like an adult but, at an emotional level, they are going to feel like a powerless child. And until what is taking place within them changes, it is going to be a challenge for them to realise that they are not a victim.
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Awareness

If one can relate to this, and they want to change their life, it might be a good idea for them to reach out for external support. This is something that can be provided by a therapist or a healer. 

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Oliver JR Cooper
http://www.oliverjrcooper.co.uk