When it comes to how one experiences life, there are going to be a number of factors that will play a part. One of these things is the state of their health, and this is something that most people are aware of.
For example, it is not uncommon to hear about how important it is to eat the right food and to exercise. Along with this, if one has something wrong with their physical health, they are likely to go and see a doctor.
There is then no reason why one should overlook this part of their life, and if they do, they might only have themselves to blame. If, on the other hand, this was something that wasn’t given a lot of exposure, then it would be easier for one to say that they didn’t realise how important this area is.
Another thing that can’t be overlooked is one’s mental and emotional health, as this will have a big effect on their day-to-day life. This is not to say that this is something that is separate from their physical health though, and this is because these two areas influence each other.
When one feels as though they are together on the inside, it is likely to be a lot easier for them to function. There will then be no need for them to simply survive; they will be able to thrive.
What this emphasises is how difficult it is for someone to enjoy their life when they are not in a good way on the inside. It is unlikely to matter what kind of physical condition they are in, as it won’t make much of a difference.
Based on this, mental and emotional health should receive as much exposure as physical health does. But as this is not the case, it can be normal for one to overlook what is taking place within them, and to suffer as a consequence.
And in order for one to be able to embrace life, it will be necessary for them to have boundaries. As if this is not the case, it is going to be something that has a negative effect on every area of their life.
Through having boundaries, one will be able to express themselves, and this is because they will feel safe enough to do so. Without them, they won’t feel as though it is safe for them to stand their ground, and it will then be normal for them to lose themselves.
One will then have no choice but to go along with what other people want them to do and this is going to lead to a frustrating existence. Their needs will have to be overlooked and they will end up fulfilling other people needs.
Yet even though this will cause them to suffer, it is going to be what feels comfortable. One is then going to be sabotaging their own life, and they are going to feel as though there is nothing they can do about it.
Along with this, one can end up isolating themselves in order to avoid having to do what other people want. Keeping people at bay will then allow them to feel safe on one hand, but it will cause them to be disconnected on the other.
Yet if one doesn’t want to be walked over by others, then it is to be expected that they would take this option. This would show that they are only aware of two options, and they alternate between the two.
When one can express themselves around others and they don’t feel the need to retract from life in order to feel safe, their life is going to be an expression of who they are. They will be able to give to the world and the world will be able to give to them.
There will be moments when they please others and moments when they won’t, but this is part life and not something that can be avoided. If one was to always say ‘yes’, they would end up harming themselves in the process.
The Right Approach
When this happens, there are going to be people who will see them as being stubborn or as unfair, for instance, but this is something that one will have to put up with. In these cases, these people are likely to be focused on their own needs and not what is in one’s best interest.
So, the disapproval that they receive throughout their life can be seen as a sign that they are actually living their life. The alternative would be for one to please others and to lose themselves.
On A Bigger Scale
Now, while an individual needs to have boundaries in order to fulfil their own needs, so does a country. When it is possible for a country to stand their ground, it is going to be a lot better for the people who live in the country.
For one thing, the country will be aware of what they stand for, and this will then allow them to make sure that the people who enter the country abide by the same values. This is because the primary concern is not going to be the need please the people that come in; it will be to maintain the way of life that already exists.
This is not to say that their needs will end up being overlooked; what it means is that they will need to adapt to the culture they are coming into. And if they are fleeing a country because of what it is like and joining a country in order to have a better life, then this would be the sensible thing to do.
There could also be a limit as to how many people could come in during each year and the majority of people that come in might have to fit a certain criteria. What this will do is make sure a country is not overpopulated and that the people who do come in generally add to what already exists.
This will allow the country to keep a close eye on their resources, and not to waste them on people who are not going to add value to their culture. Due to this, it will be possible for them to be used for the right things, and the country can then continue to develop.
The people who have helped create these resources will also benefit, and as they have worked for them, it could be said that this is how it should be. It wouldn’t be right for these people to go without.
However, when a country doesn’t have boundaries, there is going to be a greater focus on pleasing the people who want to come in (and the people who have come in) and less focus on the people who live there. And as they are unable to stand their ground, it will be normal for people from other cultures to do as they please.
These people can then live by the values they have brought in, and the people who live there will have their way of life compromised as a result. Although some people in this country will stand their ground, there are going to be plenty of people who are primarily focused on the needs of the people that come in.
In the short-term, this might allow these people to feel good and to gain the moral high ground, but in the long-term, they are going to suffer in one way of another. This could mean that it is no longer safe for them to live in the same way as they used to, or it could mean that they have to walk on eggshells to avoid offending the people who have come in (and who continue to do so).
But if they are so accepting and the people who come in are not, it is clear to see that they are setting themselves up to experience problems. This is then similar to a caregiver that always says ’yes’ to their child to avoid upsetting them, and through doing this, the child ends up causing all kinds of problems as time goes by.
What this shows is how important it is for individuals and countries to embrace the masculine and the feminine. The feminine is what allows one to say ‘yes’; whereas the masculine is what allows one to say ‘no’.
If one side is in use and the other is out of use, it is going to create an imbalance. When a country rejects their masculine side, they will be walked over, and when they reject their feminine side, they will walk over others.
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Oliver JR Cooper
Oliver JR Cooper
Author of 25 books, Transformational Writer, Teacher & Consultant.
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That which is contained within these articles is based on my own empirical understanding and is true for me at the time they were written. However, as I continue to grow, what I perceive as the truth will inevitably change and as a result of this - parts of these articles may not reflect my current outlook.