If someone was abused and/or neglected when they were a child, it may be hard for them to reveal who they are now that they are an adult. What could feel comfortable is hiding from others and hiding when they are around others.
However, even though this is what can take place, it doesn’t mean that they will be aware of this. Due to how long they have lived life in this way for, it might not even occur to them that they are hiding themselves.
Another Part of This
If this is the case, it is likely to mean that they haven’t ever taken a step back and reflected on how they experience life. Or if this has taken place, they won’t have done anything about what is taking place.
One may believe that there is very little that they can do to change their life, with this being just how their life is. Experiencing life in this way is then likely to cause them to suffer, but it will be something that they have to put up with.
Along with this, one might not even realise that what took place during their early years had a big effect on them. If their early years were extremely traumatic, they might not even remember what took place.
What took place at this stage of their life will then have been blocked out, but what took place will still be having an impact on their life. Ultimately, one is not going to be in a good way.
On the other hand, if one is aware of both how they experience life and what took place when they were younger, it doesn’t mean that their life will be much different. Even with the insights that they have, this could still be seen as something that they just have to put up with.
Hiding who they are is going to mean that their life won’t be an expression of who they are, yet this could be seen as the only way for them to survive. If ever they do reveal themselves, they could end up experiencing a fair amount of fear and anxiety.
They could look back on their life and a number of memories could appear where they ended up feeling very uncomfortable. There may have been times when they were put down, threatened and even attacked.
As a result of this, they can do everything that they can to not to be seen by others and to stay out of sight. This can generally happen unconsciously but they can also consciously do what they can to hide.
The Past Repeats Itself
Regardless of whether or not one has been able to see how their adult life is very similar to their childhood years, what they came to believe when they were a child will be having an impact on their adult life. Yet, as they are out of touch with what they believe, it will be as though they are not playing a part in how they experience life.
One is just going to be observing their reality and it is then not going to be much of a surprise if they see themselves as a victim. The first step, when it comes to changing their life, will be for them to become aware of what they believe.
A Closer Look
Thanks to what they experienced as a child, they may have most, if not all, of the following beliefs:
When they were a child, there is a strong chance that being seen wasn’t safe and that something bad would happen if they were. Nonetheless, now that they are an adult, hiding themselves is most likely going to cause them to suffer unnecessarily.
By becoming aware of what they believe and seeing how these beliefs are impacting their life, one will be able to see that they are not merely an observer of life. They will be able to see that they are playing an active part in how they experience life.
Drawing the Line
The next step will be for them to bring what they believe out into the light and to question what comes up. This can be a time when their mind will resist what is taking place, even though it is what will allow them to transform their life.
This comes down to the fact that their mind may have formed an identity around how things were. This part of them doesn’t care about where something is serving them or not; it only cares about whether something is familiar to not as what familiar is classed as what is safe.
This can be a time when one may need to reach out for external support, which can be supplied by the assistance of a therapist or a healer. Along with the beliefs that they will need to work through, there can also be emotional pain to process and trauma to resolve.
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Oliver JR Cooper
Oliver JR Cooper
Author of 25 books, Transformational Writer, Teacher & Consultant.
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That which is contained within these articles is based on my own empirical understanding and is true for me at the time they were written. However, as I continue to grow, what I perceive as the truth will inevitably change and as a result of this - parts of these articles may not reflect my current outlook.