If one was to get into self-development, there is a strong chance that it will be because they want to feel more confident. The reason for this is that this is a common challenge that people have in today’s world.
However, even if one did want to work on their self-confidence, it doesn’t mean that they will end up getting into self–development. Instead, they could decide to take a different route, and this could mean that they will end up joining some kind of class.
One could believe that they will be able to change how they behave through taking drama lessons, or through taking part in some kind of martial arts. At the same time, they may decide to do something that they have never done before as a way to alter their behaviour.
It could be said that this is the kind of approach that people would have generally taken in the past. This is due to the fact that there wasn’t as much information around and so people often had to just get on with it.
Plenty of Options
If one wanted to improve their confidence through using self-development, they are not going to be short of options. There will be a number of books that they can read if they enjoying reading.
Yet if this is not something that interests them, then they can watch videos or listen to audio books. Alternatively, they can use all three of these options, and this can allow them to learn no matter what they are doing.
During this time, one may be told that they need to change what is taking place in their mind, and through doing this, they will gradually begin to change how they behave. It can then be important for them to look into what they believe and to monitor their thoughts.
The next step will be for them to create new beliefs and to replace their ‘negative’ thoughts with ‘positive’ thoughts. This is likely to be a process and not something that will happen overnight.
Along with this, they may hear about how important affirmations are and that they will need to use these to change their self-image. They could use the one’s other people have created, or they could create their own.
When it comes to what affirmations will have the best effect, it can depend on what they need to work on. As while one could find that they are not very confident in every area of their life, it could be something that only impacts certain areas, for instance.
At the same time, even if it only affects one area of their life, it could still end up affecting other areas. One is then not going to be able to put one area of their life to one side and then to be at their best in other areas.
It could then be said that one needs to stop this from taking place, and that they can do this through controlling their mind. Even so, what it could also show is how important this area is, and that they simply need to get this part of their life handled.
Therefore, as long as they continue to work on what is taking place in their mind, they will soon be able to behave as they would like to behave. Over time, how they see themselves will change, and this means that they will feel different and the thoughts in their mind will have altered.
If they were unable to go after what they wanted, they may soon be able to do so, and if they didn’t feel comfortable around the opposite sex, this may start to change. Or they could find that they no longer attract people who are not healthy.
A New Beginning
Ultimately, there can be all kinds of ways in which their life may have improved, and they may soon forget how their life used to be. Still, they may soon find something else that they would like to work on.
And what they have achieved so far could give them the belief that they need to continue to move forward. The ball is then rolling, so to speak, and it will be vital for them to keep going in order to take advantage of the momentum that has built-up.
Yet while this could take place, one could also find that their life is not as they would like it to be. This is not to say that they won’t feel confident; what it comes down to is that this might not have had much of an effect.
One could be in a position where they feel different, but their life hasn’t really changed. This can then cause them to believe that they are simply observers of their life and that they don’t have an effect on what takes place.
The Same Story
For example, one could find that even though they feel more confident, their relationships don’t really improve, or that they are still unable to attract the right partner. If they find it easier to take action, they could find that it rarely leads to their desired outcome.
It would then be easy to say that they need to be patient and that their life will soon change. There is the chance that this is the case, but at the same time it could be a sign that one needs to do something else.
What this can show is that although one has changed what is taking place in their mind, they haven’t dealt with what is taking place in their body. As a result of this, the only thing they will have done through focusing on their mind is covered up how they really feel about themselves.
When it comes to what is taking place in their body, it can relate to the pain that they experienced during their younger years. Their body could be carrying trauma and emotional pain, and until this is dealt with it might not matter what they do to their mind.
What is taking place in their body can then be what is defining their life, and what was taking place in their mind was a reflection of this. If one can relate to this and they want to move forward, it might be necessary for them to work with a therapist.
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Oliver JR Cooper
Oliver JR Cooper
Author of 26 books, Transformational Writer, Teacher & Consultant.
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That which is contained within these articles is based on my own empirical understanding and is true for me at the time they were written. However, as I continue to grow, what I perceive as the truth will inevitably change and as a result of this - parts of these articles may not reflect my current outlook.