Critical Thinking: Are Some Men’s Lives Being Ruined By OnlyFans?

For many, many years now, it has been relatively easy for a man to access adult content. The only thing that he has needed is a device and an internet connection, with this giving him the ability to view an endless amount of pictures and videos.

In recent years, however, a man can not only view pictures and videos of women doing different things, but he can also talk to these women for a certain fee. As a result of this, he can now have a virtual girlfriend experience.

One Step Further

By seeing a woman’s body and talking to her, then, he can believe that he is in a relationship with her. Due to this, in addition to experiencing pleasure, he can feel respected and loved and connected to her.

Naturally, experiencing these feelings is going to have a positive effect on his wellbeing. But, while this ‘relationship’ will allow him to experience these feelings; it will be nothing more than a fantasy bond.

Emotionally Malnourished

Therefore, in the same way that watching other people have sex won’t be the same as having real sex, having a virtual girlfriend won’t be the same as having a real girlfriend. And, if it wasn’t for his imagination, neither of these things would do much for him.

Both the old style of porn and the modern-day version of it, where a woman has far more control, taps into a man’s ability to fantasise. Not only does this ability allow him to feel good, but it also allows him to avoid pain.

Two Sides

One of the main reasons why a woman would be interested in playing into a man’s fantasies is because it will allow her to earn money. As to why she has gone down this path as opposed to another path can be due to a number of different factors.

Yet, with that aside, there will be what has drawn a man to pay to see a woman’s pictures and perhaps to have a pretend relationship with her. In all likelihood, there was something going on for him that was painful and this sent him down this route.

An Escape

So, by being able to create a reality that is not real, it allowed him to get away from what was actually going on for him. And, although the days, weeks and perhaps months have passed since he took the first step, it will still be serving the same purpose.

What was getting him down before might not have changed and it could be even worse than it was before. To keep what is going on at bay, he might have created a fantasy that is even more elaborate than it was to begin with.

A Closer Look

Now, when it came to why he went down this path, it could be because he is in a relationship that is not going very well, he is single and lonely, or his job is not very fulfilling, for instance. This fantasy relationship that he is in will also be a way for him to release tension.

If what caused him to go down this path is even worse than it was before, this will give him a stronger need to carry on doing the same thing. With this in mind, sooner or later, what he is avoiding might become too much of an issue for him to avoid and being caught up in a fantasy might no longer cut it.

Stepping Back

At this point, it is clear even if the option wasn’t available for a man to have a virtual girlfriend, he would end up doing something else in order to release tension and feel better. Thus, to say that the platform that offers this option is the problem wouldn’t be completely accurate.

For a man in this position to no longer direct his time, energy and resources towards something that is not truly serving him, he will need to face what he is avoiding. Of course, knowing this is one thing, it is another thing altogether to do it.

A Different Approach

Most likely, he is in a position where he doesn’t feel strong enough to face what is going on or believe that there is anything that he can do about it. If this wasn’t the case, he probably wouldn’t have gone down this path to begin with.

Assuming that this is the truth, it will be a good idea for him to reach out for external support.  He can keep in mind that he has been doing the best he can with what he knows; there is no need for him to shame or blame himself.

Final Thoughts

Ultimately, experiencing pain is part of life, and it can be a lot easier to avoid it than to face it. When it comes to how a man responds to his pain, what can play a part is what his early years were like.

If, for example, his early years were anything but nurturing, he can carry a lot of pain. A natural outcome of this is that he will typically be pulled to things that will allow him to avoid how he feels. 

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Oliver JR Cooper
http://www.oliverjrcooper.co.uk