Nowadays, there are plenty of people who are offended just about every time they go online, and, the same thing can take place when they are in the real world. This can be because they have seen something has had an effect on them directly, or it might be due to another reason.
When something has affected them directly, it could show that they have read or heard something that has caused them to experience a strong reaction. As a result of this, they can feel the need to do something about it.
If it is due to another reason, it could show that one is offended on behalf of someone else or a group of people. One could see themselves as some kind of saviour and believe that it is their duty to stand up for certain people/groups.
Here, one will have the opportunity to show the world how good they are, and this will allow them to receive positive feedback. There is then no need for them to actually do anything to make the world a better place; all they need to do is to say things online.
There will be moments when this will work and there will be moments when it doesn’t. When it doesn’t work, the people who they have taken offence for could be offended by their behaviour.
A Reflection-Free Zone
If something has affected them directly, it is highly unlikely that they will look into why this is. The fact that they are experiencing a strong reactive will be the only thing that will matter.
There is then going to be no reason for them to take a step back and to reflect on why they are reacting in this way. Consequently, there is only going to be one option – which will be to do something about what has affected them.
A Common Outlook
Therefore, one won’t have played a part in what is taking place within them, it will be the result of what someone else has said or done. Based on this, one is going to be a victim, and this will give them the moral high ground.
This is then going to be no different to how someone would be a perpetrator if they were to hit another person randomly; whereas the person they hit would be the victim. In this case, the context will be different, but the outcome will be the same.
So, through having this outlook, it is going to be perfectly normal for them to try so silence the person who has offended them or to have something taken down online, for instance. What will define whether someone has done something wrong won’t be the result of anything objective - it will be the result of how they feel.
With this in mind, it shows how much control someone will have when their feelings are given so much power. One can then feel as though they are in the right when they are offended and this can also allow them to feel empowered.
One way of looking at this kind of behaviour would be to say that one wants to make the world a better place. This is why they don’t want to be exposed to anything that will make them feel uncomfortable or for anyone else to have the same experience.
Their wellbeing will be important and so will other peoples, with this being a sign that one actually cares about others. This is not something that everyone is going to agree with, though.
Another way of looking at this kind of behaviour would be to say that one is completely consumed by their own needs and feelings and they find it hard to empathise with others. One is then not willing to face up to the fact that the world doesn’t revolve around them.
Instead, they want to live in a world where they will never hear anything that they disagree with or come into contact with anyone who won’t treat them in a certain way. One is then going to look like an adult, but they will see the world through the eyes of a child.
Ultimately, the world doesn’t revolve around them, and this means that it is not going to be possible for them to only be exposed to what they agree with or for people to always treat them in a certain way. This is just not how the world works and, the sooner they realise this, the better their life will be.
Also, this might stop them from trying to control what other can and can’t say. Ergo, not only with their life improve, but it will be a lot easier for other people to express themselves.
One Big Facade
Taking this into account, when someone wants to control what other people say and do, it is not due to the fact that they care about others or that they are moral human beings. No, what it comes down to is that they are developmentally stunted.
For one thing, they can’t regulate their own emotions, and this then gives them the desire to control other people. In addition to this, they are likely to have a weak sense of self, with this being the reason why they need to receive positive feedback and validation from everyone.
When someone needs the world to revolve around them, there is a strong chance that their early years were not very nurturing. Perhaps this was a time when they were abused and/or neglected.
This would have meant that they didn’t receive the kind of care that they need to develop a strong sense of self and the ability to handle their emotions, amongst other things. If this is the case, it will be a good idea for them to reach out for external support, and this can be provided by a therapist or a healer.
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Oliver JR Cooper
Oliver JR Cooper
Author of 26 books, Transformational Writer, Teacher & Consultant.
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That which is contained within these articles is based on my own empirical understanding and is true for me at the time they were written. However, as I continue to grow, what I perceive as the truth will inevitably change and as a result of this - parts of these articles may not reflect my current outlook.