Developmental Trauma: Can Developmental Trauma Cause Someone To Lose The Will To Live?

What someone may find, if they were to reflect on their life, is that they find it hard to be motivated. Therefore, if they do feel the urge to do something, it might not be long until this is no longer the case.

Thanks to this, it is going to be a challenge for them to stick to things and move forward in life. They could then be used to watching the people in their life move forward, whilst they stand still.

A Different Direction

Then again, it might be more accurate to say that they won’t just be standing still; they will be going backwards. This could mean that they will do something for a living that is not very fulfilling.

It might simply pay the bills and allow them to be around their fellow human being but that could be about as far as it will go. Due to this, it probably wouldn’t bother them if they didn’t go back to their job again.

Another Element

It might not stop there though, as, in addition to lacking the drive that they need to do the basic things in life, let alone anything else, they could often feel very low and even consider ending their life. When this takes place, they won’t want their life to carry on any longer and will be happy to call it a day.

If, then, they feel weighed down in general, when this happens, they will feel totally floored. It can be as though they have been stripped of just about all of their energy and are unable to see a way out of the hole that they are in.

Willpower

After a while and this might last a few hours, days or even weeks, they might be able to rise up once again. This is not to say that they will now be alive; no, it means that they will be able to function.

They can be able to go to work, look happy and smile they feel the need to. But, underneath the act that they perform will be someone who is very low on energy and is close to falling down once again.

One Big Struggle

Maintaining this act will take a lot of energy as will keeping their inner experience at bay. As the years go by and they become more worn down by life and what is going on deep inside them, it is likely to get harder for them to keep going.

This can mean that they will have even more mental and emotional falls and that it will be harder for them to maintain their facade. Naturally, the sooner that they reach out for support the sooner their life will change.

One Outcome

If they were to see their Doctor, they could end up being put on medication. What this may do is allow them to feel slightly better and it may even improve their motivation.

But, even if this approach does work, it is highly unlikely that it will resolve what is taking place at a deeper level. It is likely to simply repress what has entered their conscious awareness.

Another One

Alternatively, they could end up looking for answers online; with this being a time when they will be told that they need to ‘master their mind.’ By getting control of their ‘negative’ thoughts, they will be able to change their life.

What is going on ‘up top’ will be the issue and therefore, it will be essential for them to deal with this inner material. Once again, even if this approach does work, it is unlikely that it will actually deal with their underlying issues.

Two Areas

A doctor can then see them as just a machine that is malfunctioning and this is why they need medication to correct their ‘chemical imbalance’. On the other hand, the person who says that they purely need to sort out their thoughts will see them as a walking intellect whose thoughts have just happened to be all over the place.

In the first case, one will just be a powerless victim who is nothing more than an observer of their experience, and, in the second, they will have power but who they are will begin and end with their conscious mind. In both cases, there will be no mention of the fact that they also have an unconscious mind.

Going Deeper

In order for them to understand and then to resolve what is going on for them, they will probably need to put the ‘chemical imbalance’ view to one side and to be go beyond their conscious mind. What is going on in their conscious mind, which can be seen as the tip of the iceberg, is likely to be a sign that there is a lot of material in their unconscious mind that needs to be worked through.

Their conscious experience, as challenging as it will, will then be an outgrowth of what is taking place for them in the part of their consciousness that is hidden. When it comes to what is taking place at this level, it can be due to what took place during their developmental years.

Back In Time

When they were an infant and/or a toddler, they may have often been neglected and when they were given attention, this might have been missattuned care. Not receiving the love, care and attention that they needed would have caused them to be deeply traumatised.

But, as they were totally powerless and dependent, they wouldn’t have been able to do anything about what was going on or to run away. Their only option was to disconnect from themselves and to go into a shut down, collapsed state.

A Brutal Time

While this wouldn’t have stopped what was taking place, it would have stopped them from being aware of it and, thus, ensured their survival. Their developing brain and nervous system wasn’t equipped to handle the stimulation that they would have experienced.

There would have been moments when death was seen as the only way for what they were going through to come to an end. This wouldn’t have happened but a big part of them would have died and this is likely to be the part that is trying to enter their conscious awareness.

Awareness

Not feeling motivated, feeling depressed and even suicidal are then going to be symptoms of something else. Purely dealing with these symptoms will be similar to cutting weeds off at the top.

If someone can relate to this and they are ready to change their life, they may need to reach out for external support. This is something that can be provided with the assistance of a therapist or healer.

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Oliver JR Cooper
http://www.oliverjrcooper.co.uk