Disconnected: Can Someone Only Listen To Their Needs When They Are Ill If They Are In A Disconnected State?

Although someone has needs that they need to pay attention to in order to live a fulfilling life, they can overlook a number of their needs. In fact, they might not even be aware of a number of their needs.

Therefore, they won’t be consciously choosing to be this way; it will just be what is normal. Thanks to this, a number of their needs are rarely if ever going to be met.

Self-neglect

So, this can mean that they will spend a lot of time working and seldom take the time to rest and recharge. From practically the moment they wake up until the moment they go to bed, then, they could be on the go.

And, if they were to slow down and take it easy, they could soon feel agitated and have the need to get things done. From this, it will be clear that while they have no trouble doing, it is an issue for them to just be.

No Different

If they were told that they need to go on holiday for a rest and even if they just went away, this is unlikely to occur. This can be a time when they will largely be caught up with what is going on at home or working on things remotely.  

Or, if they do take it easy, their mind can be caught up with what they should be doing and plan to do when they get back home. It is then not going to be possible for them to truly embrace their time away.

Worn Down

Over time, by not being connected to and able to meet a number of their needs, they could end up becoming unwell. This can be a time when they will feel totally washed out and exhausted.

As bad as this will be, though, it could just be a sign of what is to come if they don’t develop a better relationship with their own needs and take care of the needs that they have been neglecting. If they are able to pay attention to the message that is being given to them and make the necessary changes, they might be able to change the direction of their life.

Another Route

Alternatively, if they go back to how they were before, it might not be long until they have a very similar experience or an experience that is far worse. But, if it is similar, it might be a lot harder for them to get back on their feet.

On the other hand, if it is a lot worse, they might not be able to go back to how they were before. At this point, they could wonder why they are in such a bad way and are unable to carry on as before.

One Conclusion

They might even believe that someone or something ‘out there’ is holding them down. It can then be as if they are living in the right way but are being punished unfairly.

This is an outlook that can also be supported by the people in their life. These people can believe that they work hard and perhaps do a lot for others but are very unlucky, for instance.

Stepping Back

Now, irrespective of if what is going on for them is worse than it has been before, they will have to rest. This could even be a time when, as unwell as they are, they are able to rest to a level that they haven’t been able to rest before or perhaps not for a very long time.

Before long, what might enter their mind is that they have been out of balance and haven’t taken the time to take care of a number of their other needs. This can be seen as the best-case scenario as it will allow them to gradually change their life.

A Strange Experience

When it comes to why they are this way, there is a chance that they were made to feel ashamed of their needs during their formative years. Furthermore, this is also likely to have been when they lost touch with a number of their needs.

This may have been a time when one or both of their parents was unable to attune to their needs and was caught up with their own. The outcome of this is that, as they were egocentric, they would have come to see their needs as being bad and gradually disconnected from a number of them.

False Self

To handle what was going on, they would have had to focus on their parent's needs and to be who they wanted them to be. As the years passed, they would have gone from focusing on this parent or focusing on them less, to focusing on the needs of others.

Naturally, for them to have been able to grow and develop in the right way, they needed an attuned parent who could generally provide them with what they needed. This would have allowed them to stay connected to themselves and for this connection to be strengthened.

A New Experience

How they have behaved as an adult will be a continuation of how they had to behave as a child. For their life to change, they will need to reconnect to their needs and to know that their needs are not bad.

Awareness

If someone can realer to this and they are ready to change their life, they may need to reach out for external support. This is something that can be provided with the assistance of a therapist or healer.

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Oliver JR Cooper
http://www.oliverjrcooper.co.uk