If someone was traumatised on a weekly, if not daily, basis during their early years, there is a strong chance that they will be in a bad way now that they are an adult. Still, although what took place at this stage of their life will have had a big effect on them, it doesn’t mean that they will realise this.
In fact, they might rarely, if ever, think about this stage of their life. Furthermore, if another person was to say that the challenges that they have are largely a consequence of what they experienced as a child, they could dismiss what they say.
There are at least two reasons as to why this would take place. Firstly, some of what took place may have happened before their brain was developed enough to remember, and secondly, their mind will have blocked out what happened in order to protect them.
Not being able to remember what took place will help them in one way and harm them in another. It will help them as they won’t have to go over what happened and it will harm them as they won’t have access to the information that will shine the light on why their life is the way that it is.
However, the defences that they have in place won’t be completely effective, as is evident by the fact that they won’t be in a good way. Ultimately, they won’t remember what happened, but some of the feelings and thoughts that they experienced all those years ago will still enter their conscious awareness.
Another part of this is that they can spend most, if not all, of their time in their head. This is because what they went through all those years ago will have pushed them out of their body and their body will have seized up in the process.
If they were to get to the point, then, where they are able to see that something isn’t right, they could end up reaching out for support. For whatever reason, they will have been able to get out of the state that they were in and to see that their life doesn’t have to be this way.
Perhaps, their life has ended up getting even worse and, thanks to this contrast, they can no longer bear to live in this way. This could show that they have experienced a breakup or lost a loved one, for instance.
If they do end up reaching out for support, they could end up working with a counsellor or a coach. Or, if they don't reach out to someone directly, they could end up finding information online.
Either way, this could be a time when they are told that it is all about their mind, and for their life to change, they will need to change their thoughts and behaviour. Once this takes place, their mind will start to settle down, they will gradually feel better and their life will also improve.
It makes sense
Now, as one will spend most of their time up top, so to speak, it is to be expected that they would go along with this view. Through being disconnected from their body, what other part of them would be seen as having an effect?
As for their body, this can just be seen as the part of them that is there to support their head. The view that their thoughts create their feelings will fit well with them and won’t be something that they need to question, let alone dismiss.
A Short-Term Solution
Through trying this approach, they could find that their life does change, at least for a while. What is clear is that they are going to need to use a lot of will power to stop themselves from coming into contact with what is taking place in their body.
When this approach, an approach that can be seen as nothing more than glorified repression, wears off, they could feel even worse than they did before. What could play a part here, once again, is a powerful external trigger such as a loss, which unlocks what is taking place at a deeper level.
As for why they could feel worse, this can be due to all the power that was used to push how they felt downwards, going in the other direction, and coming back up with even more force; a bit like what happens when an arrow is pulled backwards on a bow. If one had a good connection with their body, they would know that it is not all about their mind.
With this understanding in place, what would also be clear is that although their thoughts can create their feelings, their thoughts can also trigger feelings and trauma that are held in their body. Through having a strong connection with their body, they would have a more accurate view of what is going on.
If someone has experienced childhood trauma, they will need to deal with what is taking place in both their mind and their body. If they only focus on what is taking place in their mind, it is highly unlikely that they will be able to transform themselves.
Taking this into account, when a society is made up of a lot of people who are in a disembodied state, due to having experienced trauma, it is not going to be a surprise if it is generally believed that it is all about the mind. This viewpoint will generally be upheld by those who live on the surface of themselves but are not aware of it.
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Oliver JR Cooper
Oliver JR Cooper
Author of 26 books, Transformational Writer, Teacher & Consultant.
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That which is contained within these articles is based on my own empirical understanding and is true for me at the time they were written. However, as I continue to grow, what I perceive as the truth will inevitably change and as a result of this - parts of these articles may not reflect my current outlook.