Earlier on, whilst I was out in a populated area, I overheard someone say to another person that they “stressed them out”. I had no idea why they said this to them, but there must have been a reason for it.
It would be easy to conclude that the other person was behaving in a way that was causing them to suffer. Based on this, the other person would need to change in order for them to feel more at peace
So, unless the other person changes their behaviour in some way, their life is not going to change. There is then a strong chance that their life will end up getting even worse, causing them to experience even more stress.
It could be said that they will be a victim and the other person will be a perpetrator – one of them won’t have any control, while the other one will. So, this is going to be something that is black and white.
I don’t know anything about this person, of course, but it is unlikely that there isn’t anything that they can do to change what is going on. However, even though this is the case, it is not as if it is uncommon for someone to have this outlook in today’s world.
This can be seen as what happens when someone has an external locust of control, which would cause them to believe that they have no control over their life. If, on the other hand, someone has an internal locust of control, they would believe that they have control over their life.
Someone like this would look into why they feel stressed, allowing them to do something about it. They might see that what is taking place in their mind is causing them to feel stressed.
Therefore, by changing how they think about what is taking place, it will give them the chance to feel more at peace. Along with this, they may see that their behaviour is playing a par, too.
A Different Identity
When someone responds in this way when they feel stressed, they are unlikely to see themselves a victim. They will be able to see that they can act like a victim, but that this is just a role.
The view that they have of themselves will be what allows them to take responsibility for their life, as opposed to blaming other people for what they experience. Being this way is going to be far better for their health and overall fulfilment.
The main point here is that if someone feels stressed, it will be vital for them to look into what they can do to settle themselves down. Staying as they are and blaming someone or something else is not going to solve anything.
What they need to do will depend on what is going on for them - it might be case of changing their thinking or no longer spending time with someone. Meditating on a regular basis may also help.
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Oliver JR Cooper
Oliver JR Cooper
Author of 25 books, Transformational Writer, Teacher & Consultant.
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That which is contained within these articles is based on my own empirical understanding and is true for me at the time they were written. However, as I continue to grow, what I perceive as the truth will inevitably change and as a result of this - parts of these articles may not reflect my current outlook.