While I was out the other day I saw a woman who was wearing a fair amount of makeup, and seeing this woman had quite a big effect on me. But, even though part of me was responding to what I had seen, another part of me thought about how strange this all was.
For one thing, I didn’t know anything about this woman; the fact that she looked good didn’t mean that I would like her as a person, or that she was a virtuous human being. It has been said that attraction is not a choice and I think there is a certain amount of truth to this saying.
Seeing this woman had a similar effect on me that a cake might have; it was as though part of me had been hijacked, and I experienced a strong desire to go one step further. I didn’t have to think about anything; I just felt a strong urge when I saw her.
I could be said that this was the result of my desire to procreate and that’s all there is to it. This naturally played a part, yet there was also what was going on for me at an emotional level.
Clearly, it was a lot easier for me to project things onto this woman due to the fact that she was wearing makeup. Without this, there is no doubt that she wouldn’t have looked the same.
There was a time when I didn’t have the ability to see what was going on, and this meant that I my reaction was a lot stronger and I would end up elevating a woman. What stopped me from doing this was working through the issues I had with my own mother, which allowed me to embrace my feminine aspect.
Back Down Earth
I came to see that I was projecting my feminine aspect onto women, and this caused me to elevate them. The self-love and nurturance that I hadn’t embraced internally, was then going to be provided externally by a woman.
Through undertaking this process, it became a lot easier for me to see women as just people as opposed to goddesses. Therefore, what I was looking towards women for was inside me the whole time.
The Sensible Approach
I think that it is dangerous for me, or any other straight man for that matter, to develop a relationship with a woman just because of how she looks. An attractive woman might make a man feel good in the short-term, but it could be very different in the long-term.
If a man was completely controlled by his smaller head, he wouldn’t have any control over who he ends up with. Fortunately, he can decide what kind of woman he ends up with by dealing with his own wounds and, as this takes place, it will also have an effect on what kind of woman his smaller head is attracted to.
It a man is disconnected from how he feels; it can then take a while for him to reconnect to his body. This is where all his pain will be found, pain that will stop him from being able to feel whole.
When it comes to doing this inner world, the assistance of a therapist or a healer maybe needed.
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Oliver JR Cooper
Oliver JR Cooper
Author of 25 books, Transformational Writer, Teacher & Consultant.
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That which is contained within these articles is based on my own empirical understanding and is true for me at the time they were written. However, as I continue to grow, what I perceive as the truth will inevitably change and as a result of this - parts of these articles may not reflect my current outlook.