Emotional Expression: Why Don't Some People Express How They Feel?

While there are some people who express how they feel, there are other people who don’t. And when one is not only in touch with how they feel but expresses how they feel, they’re going to experience life differently to someone who doesn’t.

This is because emotions are important and not something one can just deny. There are some people who are in touch with how they feel and there are other people who are not. And just because someone is in touch with how they feel, it doesn’t mean that they will express how they feel.

Information

Although emotions are often seen as distractions and as things that need to be removed, they’re a vital part of one’s existence on this planet. They let one know if something is right for them and if they are living their truth.

Without them, one wouldn’t know if what they were doing was right for them or not. And as well as this, they allow one to know if they are being taken advantage of and if they need to speak up and to set their boundaries.

An Analogy

If one had the need to get to a certain destination but ended up following the car in front of them, they’re unlikely to get to where they need to go. Of course, there is also the chance that the car in front is going to the same place and yet, this is unlikely.

In order for one to get to where they need to go, they will need to focus on where they’re going and not where the cars around them are going.  Through this, one will be able to arrive at the destination of their choice.

Emotions

So when one listens to their emotions, they will be able to get to where they need to go and express who they are. Without this connection, one is going to end up getting caught up in where other people want them to go and to act in ways that will please other people.

Forming connections with other people is also going to be a challenge. If one doesn’t show how they feel; other people are not going to know where they stand. One can resort to buying things for others as a way to demonstrate how they feel, but this is not going to have the same affect.

Expression

When one is in touch with how they feel and they’re comfortable expressing how they feel, it is going to stop an emotional build up from forming within them. This is going to stop one from feeling emotionally trapped or weighed down and this is because their body won’t have to hold onto their emotions.

This doesn’t mean that one will always express how they feel, as it might not always be appropriate. What they will be able to do, is to hold their emotional experience and to decide if they will be assertive, express how they feel or keep their feelings to themselves.  

Wellbeing

And through one having this kind of relationship with their emotions, they’re likely to feel more at peace with themselves. Their mind is likely to be a lot calmer and this is because their body will be a lot calmer. If one has a lot going on emotionally, their mind is likely to follow suit.

Their relationships with other people are also likely to be deeper and more significant. As a result of expressing how they feel, other people will find it easier to connect to them.

The ideal

While being able to express how one feels is the ideal and something that will enhance their lives in more ways than one, it doesn’t always take place. And this is going to mean that they will hold in how they feel and this could be a way of life for them.

If it is a way of life, it is going to mean that one has developed a habit that is harming their life. And this is going to make their life a lot harder than it needs to be and it will lead to pain that they don’t need to experience.

What May Happen

This could cause one to experience different psychosomatic illnesses and for their body to feel tight and weighed down. It might be normal for one to agree with others or they might not say anything and remain neutral.

And as one doesn’t reveal how they feel, they might end up having moments where they end up being out of control and saying things that they will later come to regret. Being assertive is also going to be problem, and something that one struggles with.

Comfortable

So although one has the need to express how they feel, this need is not being fulfilled and this is because this is what feels comfortable. If one was to express how they feel, it wouldn’t feel safe.

One might be aware of why they don’t express how they feel or this could be something that just happens. If it just happens, one might just end up feeling frustrated or fed up and wonder why they don’t express how they feel.

Associations

The reason one doesn’t feel safe expressing how they feel is going to come down to the associations they have formed. Now, these are likely to be operating out of their awareness.

If they were to express how they feel, they could believe that they will be abandoned, rejected or harmed in some way. And these associations may have been formed during ones childhood and although time has passed, their associations haven’t.

Awareness

The emotional experiences of one’s past might still remain in their body and these could be keeping their associations in place. So if one was to process what took place, they might begin to feel that it is safe for them to empress their emotions.

Or it might be enough for one to question their associations and to begin to act differently. It will all depend on the person and this is because we’re all different. The assistance of a therapist or a healer may be needed. 

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Oliver J R Cooper 
http://www.oliverjrcooper.co.uk/