Emotional Problems: Do Some People Only Want Attention When They Talk About Their Emotional Problems?
When someone talks about what is taking place in their life, it can be due to a number of reasons. Perhaps they just want to let other people know about what has been going on for them.
This can then be seen as a normal part of life and what happens in human relationships. As if this didn’t occur, it would be a lot harder for people to connect to each other; in fact, this might stop this from happening.
When two people get together and talk about what they have been doing, it is likely to have a positive effect on their relationship. And when it comes to what effect it has, it can all depend on what they actually talk about.
If they only talk about surface level things, it will help to keep their friendship alive. However, if they decide to talk about their feelings or about their needs, for instance, it might allow them to create an even deeper connection.
To Be Seen
One will also be sharing different parts of their life because of the effect this has on them; it will fulfil their need to be heard. Simply having another person listen to what they have to say will be affirming.
It could be said that this is due to the human beings being interdependent, as opposed to independent. This is just one of the things that other people provide that one can’t provide for themselves.
Therefore, if one was to go online and talk to people through social media, it is not going to have the same effect as it would if they were with them in person. Now, this could be something that they are only too aware of.
The time they spend online talking to people will then be nothing more than an addition to the time they spend talking to people in person. It is then not going to be seen as something that can replace being in the presence of another human being.
Yet, it could also be just as easy for one to forget about how important face-to-face contact is. They could then spend more time talking to people over a screen, and this is naturally going to have a negative effect on their wellbeing.
If one was to realise why they feel as they do, it will enable them to do something about it. But without this understanding, one could put it down to another reason, and this could stop them from being able to change how they feel.
In addition to one simply wanting to share their life, they can share something to gain another person’s point of view. This could be a sign that one is in a position where they don’t know what to do and they hope this will change.
The person they share something with could have a deeper understanding of what they are going through, or they could be highly knowledgeable about a wide range of topics. Through hearing their feedback, it might be only a matter of time before they are able to take the next step.
If this is not the case, it could mean that one is sharing something with someone as a way to gain sympathy. Nevertheless, this doesn’t mean that there is anything wrong with this per se.
For example, if one has recently lost a family member, they are likely to find comfort through doing this. And the people they are close to could be more than happy to show their support during this challenging time in their life.
As times passes, one’s behaviour could gradually change and they won’t have the need to experience as much attention from others. Even so, one could have the tendency to look towards other people for sympathy, and it won’t be necessary for them to have lost someone.
There could always be something that will cause them to look towards other people for attention. One thing that might do this is if they have mental and/or emotional problems.
This could be something that has small effect on their life, or it could be far more sever. One is then going to be happy to talk about what is going on for them, but they won’t have the desire to do anything about it.
If someone was to ask them if they have looked into what they can do to change how they feel, one could end up criticising them for being insensitive. This can show that one will believe that the other person has a hidden agenda and that they are not trying to help them.
A Life Sentence
One could believe that this is how their life will always be and this can then set them up to feel like a victim. The attention they seek from others can be way for them to feel better about what they are going through.
What can play a part here is that emotions are typically ignored in today’s world, and this can mean that people are often at a loss when it comes to how to deal with them. It is then not going to be much of a surprise for someone to believe that they can’t do anything about how they feel.
If one is suffering in this way, they will know that receiving attention from others won’t completely change their life. The only thing it will do is make their life marginally better from time to time.
It could be said that the best thing for them to do will be to look for answers and to do what they can to improve their mental and emotional health. This can take time and there may be a number of setbacks, but this is part of the process.
The first thing one could do is to go and see their doctor and/or to find a therapist. Looking into what took place during their childhood years may also give them insight into why they feel the way they do, and from here; they can look for ways to deal with how they feel.
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Oliver JR Cooper
Oliver JR Cooper
Author of 26 books, Transformational Writer, Teacher & Consultant.
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That which is contained within these articles is based on my own empirical understanding and is true for me at the time they were written. However, as I continue to grow, what I perceive as the truth will inevitably change and as a result of this - parts of these articles may not reflect my current outlook.