If one doesn’t know someone who is going through a tough time emotionally, they may have heard about someone in the media whose inner world is not in a good place. One could even reflect on what they have witnessed over the years and see that this is a common occurrence.
Thus, if they were to engage in black and white thinking, they could come to the conclusion that everyone has inner problems. If they were to use their mind, however, they might conclude that a lot of people are not in a good way right now.
Now, while there are the people who open up about what is going on for them, there are others who keep it to themselves. As a result of this, there are bound to be a lot of people who are suffering in silence at this moment in time.
So, although a lot of people are clearly not in a good way, what would it be like if the people who are suffering in silence opened up? What is blatantly obvious is that the only way that someone like this can put an end up what they are going through is if they reach out for support.
A Way Out
If someone is not in a good way and they reach out for support, it will put them on the road to recovery. This could be something that takes a few months or it could take years.
Still, it doesn’t matter how long it takes; what matters is that they have taken the first step. Irrespective of what they are going through, there is no need for them to put up with it.
Naturally, it is going to be radically different for someone who doesn’t do anything even though they are not in a good way. When they are around others they may act like everything is fine, creating the impression that they have it altogether.
But, when they are in their own company, the mask will fall and they will be left with themselves. The pain that is within them will rise up and when it does, it could be a challenge for them to keep their head above water, so to speak.
Ground Hog Day
After a while it might soon be time for them to go out again, with this being a time when their mask will return. One is then going to spend time around others but the people who they spend time with wont know what is going on for them.
Consequently, one is then going to be no better off than someone who is completely isolated from others. They might have plenty of friends, have a big family, and they could even be famous.
It Doesn’t Make Sense
If someone like this had a smartphone or a car that didn’t work, for instance, they would most likely do something about it more or less straight away. What has taken place would cause them to experience pain and this pain would give them the urge to take action.
Now, when someone’s inner world is not in a good way it is going to have a far bigger effect on their life, but it will be as if it is something that they can simply overlook. Sure, they may be able to disconnect from their inner world for time to time, yet this won’t always be the case.
Something Is Not Right
One way of looking at this would be to say that it’s as though one is in a car that has stopped working. Just like this car won’t be able to move forward, they won’t be able to do anything about this area of their life.
The difference is that while the car won’t work, they will have a body and a mind that will work. There is then going to be nothing stopping them from reaching out for the support that they desperately need.
A Deeper Look
Or to be more accurate, it can appear as though there is absolutely nothing stopping them from reaching out. From the outside they will look like a whole human being, but from the inside, there is a strong chance that they are anything but whole.
Their inner world can be made up of at least two elements: one that is uncomfortable with what is going on and another that is comfortable with it. The part of them that is uncomfortable with it is likely to be the weakest.
An Inner Battle
Their inner world is then not going to be operating in a harmonious manner; one part of them will be dominating the other. The part of them that is causing the problems can be their inner critic.
This part of them will be fuelled by their aggression, and it will do everything it can to keep them down. Ergo, instead of this energy propelling them forward and getting them out of the hole they are in, it will be directed towards them and push them further down the hole they are in.
Not only will this stop them form reaching out, it will also cause them to suffer internally. This inner critic can tell them that they are useless and worthless, for instance, which can cause them to feel depressed and even suicidal.
At one point in time, there may have been someone in their life who treated them like dirt - now, this voice will be within them. Through being undermined by this inner critic and feeling as though they are less-than human, they will feel as though they don’t deserve to be helped.
Deep down, they can believe that if they were to reveal what is going on for them, it would cause them to be rejected and abandoned. Experiencing a lot of inner pain is then going to cause them to suffer, but it won’t be seen as being as bad as what would happen if they were to open up.
The truth is that there is nothing inherently wrong with them and there are people out there who won’t cast them aside for opening up. With the assistance of a good therapist or a healer, for instance, they will gradually be able to accept that there is nothing inherently wrong with them.
If you feel this has been of value, please leave a comment, like or get in touch. And feel free to share this article, as many others have.
Oliver JR Cooper
Oliver JR Cooper
Author, Transformational Writer, Teacher & Consultant.
To book your free 15-minute consultation, click here.
That which is contained within these articles is based on my own empirical understanding and is true for me at the time they were written. However, as I continue to grow, what I perceive as the truth will inevitably change and as a result of this - parts of these articles may not reflect my current outlook.
Child Abuse And Neglect - How To Heal From Child Abuse And Neglect