In today's society there is a common mentality and this mentality is often called - The Entitlement Mentality. On the dictionary.com website this is described as: The fact of having a right to something and the amount to which a person has a right.
So what this means is that one has the right to something and that this right is not based on having earned the right. This right exists regardless of one having to do anything.
There are surely a lot of reasons and factors as to why the entitlement mentality exists in society. What I will be expressing here is purely my views and opinions. I do not claim to have the absolute truth; this is simply what I have come to conclude at this moment.
The Modern World
This mentality often shows up as: expecting something for nothing; the expectation that one can achieve something with minimal or no effort and believing that another person or people owe one something.
What is then created here is a very one sided attitude and an attitude that is out of balance with life. It is not based on giving and receiving; it is only about taking. On a local level this expectation could placed on family, friends or a spouse for example and on the wider scale it could be the government or an individual or organisation of importance and power.
Not only is the above one sided; it is also extremely self centred. One is only thinking about themselves and what they can gain. There is no thought or consideration as to what one can give or do for their own fulfilment. One's own needs then take precedence over everyone else's.
And this behaviour can naturally create anger and frustration from the people who are working for what they have and are giving and not just taking from this world.
We can also see that these external figures that play certain roles, which cause them to have certain statuses and titles within a given society, have their own needs to fulfil.
These people are under enormous pressure and strain to provide for people who believe they are entitled. And provide is the operative word here. If we step back and look at this as a relationship it becomes a lot clearer.
On one side we have the father and mother figures and on the other we have the children. And as children are powerless and dependent; they need someone else to take care of their needs.
So although on one side of the relationship we have people who feel they are entitled to anything and everything; on the other side we have people who are only too willing to give to people with this mentality.
And there cannot be one without the other; as soon as one side is taken out of the equation the other has very little chance of existing. That is unless it takes on another form of course.
Above I have mentioned that this is a relationship and that if we look at this through symbolic eyes we can see that the people who take on the role of being entitled are similar to children. And the figures that are perceived as having power are perceived as being the caregivers.
As children we all have needs and these needs are not always filled. Perhaps the needs that are not fulfilled are not enough to make much of a difference to the child when it becomes an adult.
However these needs may have been denied and neglected to the degree that when this child becomes an adult it will struggle to handle life and to have any sense of self.
And how empowered an individual feels and acts, will usually depend on whether or not these needs were responded too all those years ago. These are basic emotional needs and include: love, validation, approval, mirroring and touch.
Without having these needs met one will have a very poor sense of self. This is what allows one to be an individual, to know that one exists. As without being an individual and an empowered one at that, one can only exist through another and by depending on another.
Dependency And Power
It is then only natural for one to rely and depend on another person to give and supply what one needs. Here, one's personal power (self esteem) is just about nonexistent. And then it has no choice but to feel entitled; because deep within ones personal power has never been developed and realised.
Who's Too Blame?
At this point one could blame the government or caregivers. The government or the society could be blamed to allowing and supporting this mentality. And caregivers could be accountable for their inadequate care giving. And as is clear to see in the modern day world and I'm sure since time began; blame typically causes inaction and gives ones power away to an external influence.
However, what is important here is personal responsibility. And in order for this to occur; one needs to become aware. One can wait for an external figure to change their life or one can do what they can to make the changes required.
Taking care of one's needs is of paramount importance in creating a sense of self and in becoming and empowered human being. For when one is empowered; they will feel uncomfortable and even guilty by just taking and not giving.
Gift And Talents
We all have our own gifts and talents to offer this world; just as this world has plenty to offer to each one of us. Some people are aware of these gifts and talents from the moment they are born and for others it can take a while longer.
The greater our awareness of ourselves, the easier it will become to find and realise what these gifts and talents are.
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Oliver J R Cooper
Oliver JR Cooper
Author of 26 books, Transformational Writer, Teacher & Consultant.
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That which is contained within these articles is based on my own empirical understanding and is true for me at the time they were written. However, as I continue to grow, what I perceive as the truth will inevitably change and as a result of this - parts of these articles may not reflect my current outlook.