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Grounded: Is Human Touch An Important Part Of Feeling Grounded?

4/6/2014

8 Comments

 
It is not uncommon to hear people say that they feel ungrounded and while this may be a term that is more commonly used amongst people who are into self development, it is something that anyone can experience. It therefore won’t matter if they are into self development or not, as they can still have the same experience.

The words people use may be different and this is likely to reflection of what they have been exposed to. One person may use the word ‘ungrounded’ to describe how they feel and another may just say that they ‘don’t feel right’ or normal.

And one of the most common occurrences of being ungrounded is feeling anxious. Through not being in one’s body, ones attention is likely to be in their head. It might even feel as though their attention is just above their head and that they have completely left their body.

It is then not going to be possible for one to feel safe and secure, as they are likely to end up feeling unsafe and insecure. The body is where one is meant to live and not in their head or just above it; so it is not going to be a pleasurable experience.

Two Experiences

For some people, feeling ungrounded is going to be something they experience on the odd occasion. And there are going to be other people who have become accustomed to feeling ungrounded. It is then not something that happens on the odd occasions, it is a way of life.

When one only experiences this at certain moments, they are going to have moments of being grounded. Through having this contrast, one will be easier for one to recognise when they are ungrounded.

However, if one is used to feeling ungrounded, it might be hard for them to remember what it is like to be grounded. Through being this way for so long, one might have come to believe it is normal. 

Normal

There is then the chance that it feels normal through being this way for so long and there is also the chance that one has never felt any different. It is then not going to be possible for one to feel like a whole human being.

And when one is out of touch with their body, it is going to be a challenge for one to relax and to just be. What they will be familiar with is the need to do things and they could be hyper aware.  

Burdened

At its most extreme, one might not even feel human. When one is in their body, it will be possible for them to feel, but this won’t be possible if they are living in their head. One could then feel burdened by life and wonder how other people could possibly enjoy it.

Technology

In the modern day world, people often spend less time in nature and more time sat in front of a computer. And this is one reason why feeling ungrounded is so common today. Being in nature allows one to feel connected to the earth and to immerse themselves in what is real.

There is no need for them to do anything when they are there; they can just be and feel at one with nature. Their attention doesn’t need to just be in their head, it can include their whole being. However, when one is using a computer, it is very different.

Their point of focus is going to be their head and their body can end up being ignored. They have then changed from a human being and into a human doing.  But once one has used a computer, they should soon settle down. That is if they spend some time away from their computer and in nature for instance.

Another factor

But while technology has played a part in why people feel more ungrounded in the modern day world, there is also another reason. Human beings are interdependent, they need each other and yet, they have become more isolated as time has gone by.

It could be said that technology has caused people to feel more disconnected from each other, and it could also be said that technology has allowed people to feel less disconnected. It is all a matter of perspective.

But if that argument is put to one side, it is clear that a computer cannot replace human touch. This is something that humans don’t just want from others, it is something they need.

Human Touch

But while this is something that human beings need, it is not something that is always fulfilled. If one doesn’t experience human touch on the rare occasion it is unlikely to have much of an impact, but if one experiences very little, if any, human touch, it is going to have a big impact.

And when this happens, not only can it cause one to feel ungrounded, it is also going to have an impact of their mental, emotional and physical wellbeing.

However, even though one has the need to experience human touch, it doesn’t mean that they are able to embrace it. Certain life experiences could have caused them to fear it.

Sabotage

These experiences would have caused one to form different associations around human contact. But even though avoiding human touch can be what feels comfortable at a deeper level, it is not healthy.

One is then is then experiencing inner conflict and this conflict will have to be put to an end. If it is not put to an end, one will continue to avoid human touch and be ungrounded, amongst other things, as a result.

Awareness

So it will be important for one to form new associations when it comes to human contact.  And this may mean that one needs to process their past and to let go of the emotional baggage that they carry.

Experiencing some kind of body work will also help; this will gradually open one up to human touch. Through experiencing human touch, one will not only become aware of their need to experience, it, they will also feel more comfortable with it. 

If you feel this has been of value, please leave a comment, like or get in touch. And feel free to share this article, as many others have.

Oliver J R Cooper
http://www.oliverjrcooper.co.uk/
8 Comments
Sinitta
8/7/2014 11:42:59 am

Hi Oliver,

Great article thanks.

For the last while I have been stuck in my head and unable to come back in to my body. I am fully aware on the occasions when I have been anchored and grounded in my body, I have felt strong,powerful and nothing could touch me emotionally or pyshically as I have been anchored in my power.

Whereas being in my head well literally hovering above, brings feelings of powerlessness,vunerability and helplessness. Almost like the world and their mother is in my personal space while I look down at my body. Almost like I am carrying the world so to speak. I than feel like I am dragging myself around like a carcass!!! And my body does not feel like it belongs to me!!!

Thanks for the tip, I used to go for massages twice a month and stopped... Time to start doing the little things and get back in to myself.

Thanks a Mil
Sinitta

Reply
Oliver J R Cooper link
8/7/2014 05:02:46 pm

Sinitta,

thank you for your feedback.

And thank you for sharing your experiences. Massages are very good for feeling grounded. Have you ever had a Tantric massage?

Oliver

Reply
Sinitta
9/7/2014 01:17:31 am

Ah no I have not tried Tantric Massage.Actually never heard of it will google now and see what its about.

Thanks Oliver

Bella link
10/12/2014 03:15:05 am

Sorry to jump in, but Oliver you should really try a Tantric massage out! It really does define the human touch whereby creating an undefinable energy for singles and couples!

Reply
Oliver JR Cooper link
10/12/2014 10:15:09 am

Hello Bella.

thank you for your comment. I have had a number of Tantric massages and they are very good.

It sounds like you have had a few too?

All the best,

Oliver

Reply
Shoshanna Blaine
2/2/2015 04:56:44 am

Your article made me cry because it stuck in my face that I haven't been hugged for more than a brief moment for
6 years. It hurts so much . I loved snuggling with my husband or my kids.
We were a very affectionate family . A kiss ; a peck and a hug around the neck was our family motto. I got sick so my husband found a new woman and took my children ( now 19 and 23 ) He told them horrible lies about me they believe so I don't ever see my son and my daughter sometimes . I'm so much better now . I would give anything just to hold hands , sit together on my couch or my ultimate craving : to hug and be hugged while falling asleep and to be next to someone all night . I really like sex and am Multi orgasmic but

Reply
Shoshanna Blaine
2/2/2015 05:15:43 am

Continued : I'm surprised that sex is not my pressing need but it just isn't. Without affectionate touch I feel lonely , unhappy and that I am not fully participating in the experience of life . It is so painful I feel a distinct discomfort in my chest when I'm really missing it. In my opinion a life is not a good life in the absence of the touch

Reply
Oliver JR Cooper link
2/2/2015 05:57:13 am

Hello Shoshanna,

thanks for getting in touch and for sharing that.

It is clear that this was a big loss in your life and perhaps the discomfort in your chest is a sign that you need to grieve the loss.

I hope you are able to move on from what happened and to experience affection once more.

All the best,

Oliver

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    Oliver JR Cooper

    Author of 28 books, Transformational Writer, Teacher & Consultant.


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