If someone had to choose between feeling happy or feeling unhappy it is clear that in most cases they would choose the first option. When one is happy, not only will their inner world change, it is also going to have an effect on their outer world.
This inner change will cause their behaviour to change and how they perceive the world around them is also going to change. And through feeling different and perceiving the world around them differently, it is going to have an effect on how other people respond to them.
Life in general is going to seem more worthwhile and this could mean that one makes better use of their time.
The Other Experience
Alternatively, if one doesn’t feel happy it is inevitably going to have a different effect on their life. What is going on inside is going to be different and this is going to play a part in how they perceive the outside world.
Their behaviour is going to change and how other people respond to them is also going to change. One might end up wondering what the point of life is and they could waste their time as a result.
Now And Then
So if this is something that happens every now and then, it is probably not going to have too much of a negative impact on someone’s life; being unhappy is part of being human and it is not something that can be avoided.
However, if one constantly feels unhappy, then it is going to have a negative impact on their life. And in certain circumstances it could make one end their life. Being unhappy is something that many people will have become used to and it might seem as though this is simply part of life.
A Way Of Life
If one is used to feeling happy, then it might be easier for them to accept the times when they are not happy. But if one always feels unhappy, it is going to be a lot harder for them to accept how they feel.
One might decide that it is better to not feel at all, than to feel unhappy all the time. But as many people will know who are on antidepressants for instance; through taking away one side of the spectrum you take away the other. Not only does it stop one from feeling unhappy, it also stops them from being able to feel happy.
It is not possible for them to experience a wide range of emotions. They are emotionally cut off and are simply going through the motions of life.
Life Is Short
And as life is short, it is important to get the most out of it. But all the time one feels unhappy, it is going to make it harder for them to enjoy it. It could feel like a burden and something that they have to endure.
So based on this, it is clear that life is too short to be unhappy. If one feels happy, they are going to get a lot more out of it and they will be less likely to waste their time.
What this shows is that it will be important for one to not let life get to them or to bring them down and to focus on what brings them happiness and joy. And this is good advice; as life is full of distractions and it can be easy to be consumed by them.
Through taking control of what one focuses on, it will enable them to feel better and to stay on track. But just because life is short, it doesn’t mean that one should stop themselves from being unhappy.
At times, life is going to have moments that cause one to feel unhappy and is not something that one should avoid. That doesn’t mean that one becomes stuck there and stays there for the rest of their life, what it means is that one embraces how they feel.
In the beginning, one may try to avoid how they feel, but this will have a negative effect on their life in the long term. When emotional pain is experienced, the mind will do everything it can do stop one from feeling the pain. Defence mechanisms will be used to moderate how one feels.
This can lead to denial and while one may feel happy on the surface, it doesn’t mean that this is a true reflection of what is taking place at a deeper level. As the saying goes ‘out of site out of mind’, but even though one may be unaware of how they feel it doesn’t mean that these feelings are not influencing their life.
Feeling happy is then another form of avoidance or ‘positive thinking’. Mentally one could be fine, but their emotional health is going to suffer. And as what is going on at an emotional level will effect what is going on at a mental level, it shows how important it is to be in touch with how one feels.
For example, loss is part of life and when one losses something they are going to experience grief. If one has lost a family member or someone they are close to, they are going to need to face their pain and to work through it.
That fact that life is short is irrelevant; this grieving process is not something that one should avoid. Through facing how one feels, they will gradually move through their pain and as time passes, they will be able to experience happiness once more.
If one wants to be emotionally healthy, this is the route to take. In the short term it is not necessarily the easiest option, but it has long term benefits. To avoid how one feels might feel better in the short term, but this could cause one to have emotional problems in the future.
And if one is finding it difficult to deal with their emotions, then it will be important for them to seek some kind of assistance. This could be from a therapist or some kind of healer.
Oliver JR Cooper
Author of 26 books, Transformational Writer, Teacher & Consultant.
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That which is contained within these articles is based on my own empirical understanding and is true for me at the time they were written. However, as I continue to grow, what I perceive as the truth will inevitably change and as a result of this - parts of these articles may not reflect my current outlook.