If one felt guilty whenever they consumed a certain type of food, it is going to be hard for them to enjoy eating it. On one hand, they might continue to eat it and put up with how they feel, and on the other hand, it might cause them to stop eating something altogether.
This could be a sign that one is on some kind of diet, and in order for them to reach a specific target, they are going to need to stay away from certain foods. It could also come down to the fact that one has been told not to eat something for health reasons. A Positive Effect In this case, it could be said that it is good that one feels guilty as it will encourage them to stay on track; whereas if they didn’t feel guilty, they might find it harder to eat the right food. As a result of this, it could take them ever longer to reach their ideal weight, or their health could get even worse, for instance. However, in one felt guilty whenever they consume something that isn’t bad for them, it is going to have a negative effect on their life. They are going to feel as though they are doing something wrong, and there is no reason for them to feel this way. A Small Problem But while this might have an effect on them when they think about eating something and once they have eaten something, it is unlikely to stop them from being able to enjoy life in general. They should still be able to carry on with the rest of their life. For one thing, there is a strong chance that they will be able to find something else to eat, and this might not only be as healthy, it could taste just as good. This also means that one should still be able to feel happy. A Completely Different Experience However, if one feels guilty whenever they feel happy, it is going to be a lot harder for them to enjoy life. One could work hard to achieve something, and once they have achieved it, they might not allow themselves to enjoy it. One could then wonder why they work so hard to achieve things, but at the same time; this doesn’t mean they will simply give up altogether. Once they have achieved something, they could soon move onto something else. Another Outcome Alternatively, one could stop themselves from achieving anything as a way to avoid feeling guilty. While this is going to mean that one will have to put their goals to one side, it will stop them from feeling as though they have done something wrong. This shows that although this will cause them pain, it won’t be as strong as the pain they would feel if they were to experience life differently. The way for them to keep their guilt in check will be to stop themselves from growing and to sabotage their life. External Support If one is still able to experience achieve things, the people around them might find it hard to understand why they come across as they do. They might say that they deserve to be happy, and that there is no reason why they should feel guilty. Yet, even though one might hear this from the people they are close to, it doesn’t mean it will change how they feel. One might also find it hard to understand why they feel the way they do. Normal This could be how one has always experienced life, and in this case, it is going to be a normal part of their life. However, there is also the chance that one only started to experience life in this way after something happened. Based on what their life was like at one point in time, it might have been possible for them to be happy from time to time. But as they started to experience success, they may have started to struggle. Reaching Out Nevertheless, regardless of how long they have been in this position for, it will be important for them to reach out for support. This could mean that one will go onto a search engine and read up on this subject, or they might just go out and buy a book. Another approach would be for them to look for a therapist that understands what they are going through. And while they will want to move forward, they might also wonder why they are experiencing life in this way. One Reason They might be asked about their childhood, and this is because what took place during these years may be the reason why they feel guilty for being happy. Perhaps one had a parent who was rarely happy or suffered in some way. If one was happy, they might not have felt safe; therefore, in order for them to be approved of, they may have had to stop themselves from being happy. At this time, one wouldn’t have thought about how this would affect their life as an adult; their focus would have been on doing what they could to survive. One Approach As one’s thought play a part in how they feel, one option would be to change what is taking place in their mind. Their thinking patterns will then change and this could then have an effect on how they feel. Along with changing what it taking place in their mind, it might also be important for one to mourn their unmet childhood needs. This is because what is taking place in one’s body can influence what is taking place in their mind. Holding On After one has changed what is taking place in their head and released what had built up in their body, they may find that they no longer feel guilty for being happy. However, there is also the chance that they will still feel the same. When this happens, it could be a sign that one is holding on out of their need to be loyal to their family. The child part of them can hold onto how they feel, and if they were to let go, it could be seen as an act of betrayal. Loyalty What this comes down to is that what doesn’t get dealt with in one generation can get passed onto the next. And in order to bring balance to the family system, one may have taken on board problems that didn’t belong to them. It might be hard to understand why this would take place, and this is why it is important to remember that how one perceives life now would not have been the same as how they would have perceive it during their early years. Through being given life, they would have felt the need to give something in return. Awareness The purpose would then be to change what someone in their family couldn’t change, but as it doesn’t belong to them, it is not going to be possible for them to do this. This is why they will need to try another approach. One way one can let go of what isn’t theirs will be to have a family constellation. This is something that can take place in a workshop or through a one-to-one session.
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Oliver JR Cooper http://www.oliverjrcooper.co.uk/
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Oliver JR CooperAuthor of 28 books, Transformational Writer, Teacher & Consultant. Introductory Consultation
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Disclaimer
That which is contained within these articles is based on my own empirical understanding and is true for me at the time they were written. However, as I continue to grow, what I perceive as the truth will inevitably change and as a result of this - parts of these articles may not reflect my current outlook.
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