A little while ago I spoke to someone whose son had gone through a break up, and this was something that had a big impact on him. She didn’t say how long he had been with her for, but she did go into what he had gone though.
He ending up losing the will to live and, as a result of this, he wanted to end his own life. When he was about to go and do this, his mother got hold of him and stopped him from going anywhere until he had settled down.
Hearing this made me think about how fortunate this guy was that his mother was there to give him the support that he needed. What also helped was that he didn’t hide what he was going through; allowing his mother to know what was going on for him.
If he had just kept what he was going through to himself, he wouldn’t have been able to get the support that he desperately needed. Also, if he had needed support but his mother hadn’t taken him seriously; it would have been just as bad.
In order for a man in this position to get the support that he needs, he will need to open up and he will need to do this around people who actually care about what he is going through. The first step is talking to someone and if this doesn’t go well, it will be vital for to find someone who does care.
When I heard this women talking about what her son had gone though, I didn’t feel the need to judge him. The reason for this is that I knew how painful it can be when a relationship comes to an end.
I have had a number of break ups in the past that have completely floored me. At one point in time I would feel good and, at another, I would be completely overwhelmed with pain.
I wanted this pain to come to an end, but I would never get to the point where I tried to end my life. I would say that this was due to the understanding that I had of myself and the support that was available to me.
Through reading books on early neglect and abuse and taking courses, I was aware of how a lot of the pain that was coming up was from when I was very small. In addition to this, I would have at least one therapist/healer who I could work with.
I still experienced a lot of pain but what my understanding of myself and the support gave me was the belief that there was way for me to move forward. If I didn’t have the understandings that I had and I wasn’t aware of anyone who could assist me, it would have been very different.
So, if you have just gone through a break up and you are in a bad way, don’t suffer in silence. You can look for answers online or you can go and see your doctor; what matters is that you don’t give up on yourself.
I believe that you will find a way through this pain, yet that will only happen if you get the assistance that you need to transform your life. Keep going and don’t give up.
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Oliver JR Cooper
Oliver JR Cooper
Author of 25 books, Transformational Writer, Teacher & Consultant.
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That which is contained within these articles is based on my own empirical understanding and is true for me at the time they were written. However, as I continue to grow, what I perceive as the truth will inevitably change and as a result of this - parts of these articles may not reflect my current outlook.