Helpless: Can Childhood Trauma Cause Someone To Feel Helpless?

If someone was able to take a step back and reflect on their life, what they may find is that they often feel helpless. This could be how they have experienced life for as long as they can remember.

Consequently, it is unlikely that they have a very fulfilling existence. In fact, they could often feel as though life is a burden and wonder why they are even on this earth.

A Rare Experience

If they do feel powerful, then, it is going to be the exception as opposed to the rule. This could be an experience that they have when something in the external world is going as they want it to go.

So, this could take place when they have a certain amount of money, are treated well by the sex that they are attracted to and receive attention, for instance. Additionally, this could occur when they exercise, drink and/or do something creative.

Two Extremes

Considering this, it is going to be normal for them to spend only a small part of their life feeling a sense of control and the majority of their life feeling totally powerless. Thanks to how different these experiences will be, it could be as though they are often on top of a mountain in one moment and deep in the ground at another.

When this is not the case, they will be in the middle; neither feeling powerful nor powerless. During the moments when they go from feeling powerful to powerless, it could be even harder for them to come to handle what is going on.

An analogy

But, before long, they could soon forget about how they felt before, being consumed by their inner experience. One way to look at what has taken place would be to imagine a building that has collapsed.

At one point in time, it would have looked strong and sturdy, but now, it will just be a pile of bricks on the ground. The difference here is that although one won’t have physically fallen down and disintegrated, they will have fallen right down on the inside and lost touch with their centre.

A Big Difference

It won’t matter how strong or fit they look on the outside as they will feel totally impotent on the inside. They won’t have anything on top of them, but they could feel as if they are underneath a fallen building.

When they are in this place internally, it could be hard for them to get out of bed or to find the motivation to do anything. If they are able to get themselves moving, it could take a lot of will power.

A Label

If another person was to describe what is going on for them, they could say that one is depressed. To go further, they could say that they have no energy and are in a place of deep despair.

Due to this, it could be put forward that way for them to solve what they are going through is by going on medication. Through having a “chemical imbalance”, their brain won’t be able to function properly.

A Miserable Existence

With that aside, when it comes to their life, it is unlikely that a great deal of it will reflect their true-self. Their career, that’s if they have one, and their relationships, that’s if they have any, could bring them very little fulfilment or joy.

Yet, regardless of what is taking place in these areas of their life as well as others, they probably won’t believe that they can do anything about them. They will simply have to tolerate what is going on and to put up with the pain this causes.

External Support

If they were to reach out for assistance, this could be a time when they will be told that they need to change their thoughts and behaviour. By doing this, they will be able to experience a sense of control and feel powerful.

After the weeks and months go by, they may find that changing their thoughts and behaviour does allow this to take place. Then again, this approach might not be very effective, which could cause them to feel even worse.

Going Deeper

At this point, what might become clear is that purely focusing on what is taking place up top is not going to change their life. The reason for this is that there is a strong chance that they are in a traumatised state.

If this is so, not only will their mind be in a bad way, but their nervous system will also be in a bad way. This part of them will need to be the point of focus and for the charge that it is carrying to be dealt with.

Back In Time

What this can show is that their early years were a time when they were abused and/or neglected on a regular basis. Throughout this stage of their life, they would have been utterly helpless.

As they were dependent and powerless, there wouldn’t have been anything that they could do to put an end to what was going on. Their only option was to freeze up (to play dead) and to leave their body (to dissociate), something that would have allowed them to take their awareness away from what was going on and to ensure their survival in the process.

Stuck

Many, many years will have passed since this stage of their life but their nervous system won’t realise this. This part of them will still be responding in the same way as it did all those years ago.

Until their system is out of this frozen state and is back in balance, they will continue to experience life in the same way. This means that they will continue to have thoughts, feelings and sensations that correspond with this inner state and to manifest a life that is in alignment with it.

Awareness
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If one can relate to this, and they are ready to change their life, they may need to reach out for external support. This is something that can be provided with the assistance of a therapist or healer.

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Oliver JR Cooper
http://www.oliverjrcooper.co.uk