When people work together and are all on the same side, so much can be achieved. If there is disharmony amongst people, problems can appear and this can lead to things being slowed down, or stopped completely.
One example that comes to mind here is a sports team. When everyone in the team works together, amazing things can happen. But when just one of those members in the team is out of alignment with the rest, it can disrupt the whole ream. And the same thing applies to someone’s life.
To have inner conflict can cause all kinds of challenges and some of these may be so insignificant that they are able to be ignored or overlooked. However, there will be other conflicts that are not possible to push to one side and this is because they are far too impactful to overlook.
It is often said that outer conflict is a sign of inner conflict. Here, one can experience outer struggles and strains as a consequence of what is going on internally. And yet if one is experiencing inner conflict, they often won’t have to look as far as that to come to the understanding that something is not right.
How one feels, thinks and the emotions that they are experiencing, can cause a lot of inner unease and unrest. This will the mean that how one behaves will reflect what is going on inside and this is unlikely to functional.
And as well as defining how ones behaves, how one sees the world and other people will also be defined by this inner conflict. So there are many different effects that can take place through having inner conflict.
One can have the need or desire to have something in their life and yet the opposing forces within stop one from doing what they need. This is often described as self sabotage and this is simply another name for inner conflict.
Here, one has a desire to have something and yet doesn’t do what they need to do. Or one has attained exactly what it is they wanted and does one thing or a number of things to push it away. To the outsider, this can come across as very strange and not make any sense.
One could be aware of why this is taking place or they might be as baffled as other people are. And wonder why they are not going after what they want or why they sabotage exactly what they want.
There are going to be many areas where this is experienced and the primary areas can be: relationships, success, health and finances.
One may have the desire to have a loving relationship with another on one level and yet feel incredible fear when another person gets close to them. Or one may already be in a relationship that is loving and supportive and because they fell emotionally trapped, soon end the relationship. Soon after, a sense of regret and confusion may appear.
The need to grow and express oneself is a natural and healthy need. And while one may desire to learn new skills or improve on the ones they have, there could be feelings that are so powerful that one doesn’t learn anything new or allow themselves to progress in life. These could relate to feelings of being rejected and abandoned if they were to be seen.
To be in physical shape, by getting rid of weight or gaining weight, can be the intention. But while this desire is there, there can also be deeper fears that one will feel vulnerable if they lose or gain weight. So as they don’t feel that it is safe, they don’t go ahead with their plans or if they do, they stop before long.
These are just some examples of how inner conflict can affect someone’s life and there are many others. However, while inner conflict can seem normal and how life is, it is not a true reflection of how the body is.
Life if often said to be a journey of letting go and realising that one is already whole and complete. But what gets in the way of this, is what one has picked up over their life. So while some kind of inner conflict could be described as normal; to experience extreme conflict, is a clear sign that something is not right.
Emotions And Feelings
To have emotions and feelings that come and go is part of life and yet this doesn’t always happen. They can end up staying in the body, trapped and therefore hidden from ones awareness. The mind can believe that they no longer exist and that’s the end of it.
But while the mind can live in this delusion, the body is paying the price. The bodies vital organs, skin, bones and muscles, will be where they are stored. And how one sees life, behaves and the people they are attract and are attracted to, will be defined by these emotions and feelings.
Now, one may be aware of these from time to time or at certain moments. Or they may be completely oblivious to them. When one is aware of them, they will see how their external reality is mirroring them. But if they are not, it can be one big mystery.
And as these trapped feelings and emotions do not belong in the body, they can end up taking over. So instead of one’s life being a reflection of what is true for them and what will bring them real fulfilment; it becomes a reflection of these trapped emotions and feelings.
These could have been trapped in one’s body since they were a baby. The experiences one has as an adult can add to these and yet childhood experiences are often the biggest cause. Growing up in an environment where ones caregivers were physically or emotional unavailable can be key factors.
Ones caregivers’ world have ignored and dismissed how one felt and so one had no choice but to push their feelings and emotions out of their awareness in order to survive.
These emotions and feelings will need to be released from the body. Through this, one can let go of a lot of inner and outer conflict and gradually lead a life that reflects who they really are.
This can be done through the assistance of a therapist or healer who allows one to get in touch with their feelings and emotions and release them.
Oliver JR Cooper
Author of 26 books, Transformational Writer, Teacher & Consultant.
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That which is contained within these articles is based on my own empirical understanding and is true for me at the time they were written. However, as I continue to grow, what I perceive as the truth will inevitably change and as a result of this - parts of these articles may not reflect my current outlook.