If someone is in a position where they are often all at sea and find it hard to feel at peace, their life is going to be far more difficult than it needs to be. With so much going in within them, they are not going to need to live a stressful life in order to feel stressed.
They could then live in the middle of nowhere in a log cabin but they could still find that they rarely feel at ease. On the other hand, if they live in a city, the amount of stimulation that is around them is not going to do them any good.
If they were a machine, they would be a machine that is constantly switched on; they are rarely, if ever, going to be turned off. It then won’t matter if they consume energy drinks or have a lot of caffeine, for instance, as they will be “on” a lot of the time.
Due to this, they could often feel wired but tired, and this will probably mean that they often find it hard to sleep. Once they are in bed they could feel totally worn out and yet, this won’t be enough to allow them to fall asleep.
There could be a lot of nights when they don't get much sleep whatsoever and nights when they have nightmares. Consequently, when they wake up, they can feel washed out and irritable.
So, to go back to the machine analogy again, they can be like a machine that still runs even though it is on its lasts legs. Like this machine, it could be as if they are about to break down or implode at any moment.
When they are at work, that’s if they are able to hold a job down, they could find that it is incredibly difficult for them to focus. And, if they can do this, it might not be long until their mind wonders off or they start doing something else.
This may mean that they are often behind and have been given a number of warnings about their performance. If they have been given warnings, this could have been a time when they experienced a lot of anxiety and fear or rage.
The Right Fit
To go one step back, there is the chance that they will work in an environment that is full of stimulation, such as a bar or club. How they are will most likely allow them to perform well in a job like this.
Being more or less always on will allow them to meet the demands of their environment. Nevertheless, this can be a job that will, sooner or later, burn them out and cause them to hit rock bottom.
If they experience a lot of fear and anxiety when they are warned about their performance, assuming that they have been warned, this is unlikely to be anything that is out of the ordinary. These two feelings are likely to be a normal part of their day-to-day life, along with panic, anger and frustration.
They can also be used to feeling extremely helpless and hopeless. This is not to say that they will be able to describe how they feel, though, as how they feel could typically be a mystery to them.
Always On the Go
When they are not working, they could be doing something else that is just as stimulating as their job. This could be a time when they are out with friends, exercising or doing another job.
If they do take a break and do nothing, it could only be because they are unable to do anything else; something that could take place if they were in a place or had picked up an injury. But, as their mind is likely to be racing, it is not going to be possible for them to rest and to actually recharge.
A Recipe for Disaster
Thanks to how their life their live, it is not going to be a surprise if they end up in a very bad way. Naturally, living like this is going to take its toll on them; after all, they are not a machine and, even if they were, they would still need to rest from time to time.
What is clear here is that their being is out of control and this causes them to live a life that is out of control. The part of their being that should regulate them and allow them to maintain homeostasis is not functioning as it should.
If they were able to take a step back from their life and to reflect on how long it has been this way, they may find that it has practically always been this way. Nonetheless, they may find that after certain events in their life, they become even more worn down.
After a breakup, the loss of a loved one and/or a stressful job, for instance, they may see that they experienced even more stress and that their life became just unbearable in the process. Thus, if they were able to just about keep it together, one or a number of these things would have been the straw that broke the camel’s back.
Out of Balance
Their nervous system has the ability to calm them down and to fire them up. Their parasympathetic nervous system will allow them to feel at ease and to regulate themselves, and their sympathetic nervous system will allow them to get things done and protect them from danger.
If this is the case, why it is that they are spending so much time in the mode that is there to get them moving and protect them from danger? This has a time and a place but spending most of their life there is going to greatly undermine them.
Said another way, to experience adrenalin from time to time will be fun, but to experience it all the time will undermine every part of their being. What this is likely to show is that their nervous system has, at one point in time, being overwhelmed.
What was going on was too much for their system to handle, which stopped their nervous system from working properly. The challenges that they have, irrespective of whether it relates to what has been mentioned above or trouble taking in new information, isolation, headaches, stomach problems, hypervigilance, hormone problems, increased heart rate, reactive behaviour or feeling emotionally numb, will chiefly come back to this part of them being maxed out.
Back In Time
If this is how their life has been for as long as they can remember, it is likely to illustrate that their early years were extremely traumatic. Perhaps they were abused and/or neglected on a regular basis.
This would have been a time when their nervous system wasn’t fully developed and they were powerless to do anything about what was going on. Unsurprisingly, this would have been a time when their nervous system was totally overwhelmed.
What happened will be over and they might not remember much about it, but their nervous system won’t have left their early environment. As a result, they will continue to experience life in the same way.
If one can relate to this, and they are ready to change their life, they will probably need to reach out for external support. This is something that can be provided with the assistance of a therapist or healer.
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Oliver JR Cooper
Oliver JR Cooper
Author of 25 books, Transformational Writer, Teacher & Consultant.
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That which is contained within these articles is based on my own empirical understanding and is true for me at the time they were written. However, as I continue to grow, what I perceive as the truth will inevitably change and as a result of this - parts of these articles may not reflect my current outlook.