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Obsession: Is Obsession A Bad Thing?

10/5/2013

10 Comments

 
The words addiction and obsession can appear to describe the same thing. And yet there is a clear distinction between the two. An obsession is something that is usually in the mind and can relate to people, things and ideas; so all that is abstract and all that is concrete.

On the other hand, an addiction is something that could be described as a doing and relates to the actions that one takes. It is possible for one to be addicted to something without thinking about it all the time; and for someone to be obsessed by something without the need to act on the obsession.

Examples

One can become obsessed with anything and this can be to do with people who are: actors, musicians, sports stars or models. Just as one can become obsessed with: losing or gaining Weight, looking younger than they are, looking good at all times and to eating the right foods.

As well as these examples, one can also be obsessed with: fame, success and winning. And this can relate to a man or a woman that one is in a relationship with or someone who one wished they were in a relationship with.

Obsessed

The words ‘you’re so obsessed’ are often expressed when one person becomes aware of this in another person. An obsession can then seem to be something that one should feel ashamed of for having.

And while it is clear that it could well lead to dysfunctional and unhealthy experiences, it is clearly not black and white. Although it may well be displayed as something to be avoided, it can also lead to incredible productivity, achievement and success.

Focus

However, this will of course depend on what one is obsessed with. If one is obsessed with losing weight for instance, it can lead to both positive and negative consequences. On the positive side, it will mean that one is likely to stick to the process and not give up on what needs to be done.

It could also mean that one will lose sight of everything else in their life and the balance that this would bring; creating intense stress, anxiety and pressure in the process. And due to the attachment that being obsessed creates, it may result in one feeling hopeless, disempowered and even depressed if it doesn’t go to plan.

Attachment

This gives us an insight into what obsession actually is. It involves the mind attaching to something. And once it has attached to this, be it an idea or a person, it will not let go; A bit like a baby with a dummy.

Here ones whole focus will be consumed by an object, idea or fantasy. There will be no space or time for anything else to be allowed into one’s mind. So what the ego mind can do though this process, is to regulate uncomfortable and unpleasant emotions.

Regulation

An obsession could be labelled as a defence mechanism. At first glance it would be easy to point the finger at ideas, objects or people and to say that these things have power over the person who is obsessed. But this is only part of the equation.

Through being attached, they are acting as a distraction and as a way to avoid what is too painful for the mind to face. So, as I mentioned above; they are helping to regulate ones emotions, but this is unlikely to be a long term solution.

Part Of Life

Unless one lives on a mountain or in the middle of nowhere and away from everything, there is going to be internal unrest at times. And one way to deal with this is to become obsessed to something that will take ones attention away from the pain.

And if that is something that will lead to a sense of fulfilment being created and not to long term problems, then it is surely a good thing.  At times this may lead to sense of unbalance; but that’s part of life and can’t always be avoided and neither does it need to be.

Awareness

What is important here is that one is aware enough to monitor this process. To evaluate what is happening and then to decide if it is leading to or will lead to the consequences that one wants to create.

It would easy to say an obsession is a bad thing, but it’s obviously not that simple. How emotional aware and intelligent one is, will go a long way to defining what one is obsessed to and how obsessed they become.

If this has become a problem in one’s life, then they may need to seek the assistance of a therapist, healer or coach. Or to educate themselves further on this important topic.
If you feel this has been of value, please leave a comment, like or get in touch. And feel free to share this article, as many others have.

Oliver J R Cooper
http://www.oliverjrcooper.co.uk/
10 Comments
Emily
16/6/2016 06:04:43 pm

Thanx alot....... The article was very helpful Thanx again. :)

Reply
Oliver JR Cooper link
16/6/2016 06:08:48 pm

Hello Emily,

thank you for your feedback.

All the best,

Oliver

Reply
Michael
21/8/2017 04:36:58 am

this article was helpful thanks mr.cooper. This article helped me understand y I randomly stoped playing ice hockey(it seems I was obsessed). So soon I will eventually do another sport(wrestling) and I don't want to become obsessed like when I played hockey. So my ? Is how do I not become obsessed with wrestling but be determined enough to maybe make wrestling a career? Do I just balance everything else out in my life and not think about it 24/7 which is what I did for hockey

Reply
Oliver JR Cooper link
23/8/2017 06:14:32 pm

Hello Michael,

thank you for your comment.

What you could do is look into how you feel when you take a step back - you may find that you start to feel uncomfortable.

You can then look into what you are tying to avoid by being obsessed.

All the best,

Oliver

Reply
Rick
23/8/2017 04:42:41 pm

Very helpful! I concur! I've always been an obsessive person. It real does motivate me more than anything! Anything I really am passionate about I become attached and obsessive. It's very true people automatically judge it as bad. But I understand that. I too have become overly obsessive in a negative way but as I grow I am more aware. I have a deep emotional capacity to feel and I love it! It gives me a natural high and I feel alive! Like I said though I've had my moments..lol

Reply
Oliver JR Cooper link
23/8/2017 06:17:14 pm

Hello Rick,

thank you for your comment.

I enjoyed reading what you had to say.

All the best,

Oliver

Reply
tara
29/10/2017 02:57:13 pm

ok i love this guy and i cant get him out of my mind, 1 am i obsessive and 2 is that bad? Because people call me weird, crazy, and obsessive.. and thats why they don't like me.

Reply
Oliver JR Cooper link
2/11/2017 01:31:10 pm

Hello Tara,

when someone is obsessed with another person it can show that they are trying to avoid how they feel. With this in mind, it might be a good idea for you to take a step back and to look into what you might be trying to avoid.

The assistance of a therapist might be needed here.

All the best,

Oliver

Reply
Katerina
25/12/2019 04:16:36 am

Hello. It's been almost two years that I'm obsessed with studying medicine. It occurred me again before as well, but I was mostly obsessed with becoming an actress.

Moreover, while I'm using the verb "being obsessed" I don't know If I quite feel it as an obsession but rather as something more real, like a desire.

Why I don't do it? Of course there is a background of me that I couldn't elaborate here.

However, I studied to be a teacher and I like it. I also like psychology and decided to study it -but I don't do it because my medicine fantasy doesn't let me-, I'm 30 and I see it hard to start something so commiting and aspirational. Plus, I am seeing a therapist 2.5 years already, and I feel therapy is going well. It has revealed quite a lot about my lack of self esteem and the envy and anger that are my core feelings. But I can' t get over my "obsession" with medicine.

What's your opinion?

Reply
Oliver JR Cooper link
17/6/2020 06:25:36 pm

Hello Katerina,

ok, one thing you could do is to find a piece of paper and to write at the top 'why do I want to study medicine?' and just write whatever comes to mind.

On another piece, write 'how do I think I will feel if I study medicine?'

It has been said no matter what we desire, it's because we believe it will allow us to feel a certain way.

Perhaps, part of you doesn't believe that you have what is takes to study medicine, why is why you just obsess over it instead?

I hope that helps.

All the best,

Oliver

Reply

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    Oliver JR Cooper

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    That which is contained within these articles is based on my own empirical understanding and is true for me at the time they were written. However, as I continue to grow, what I perceive as the truth will inevitably change and as a result of this - parts of these articles may not reflect my current outlook.





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