Passive: Can Developmental Trauma Cause Someone To Be Passive?

While there is a time to be and a time to do, someone could be in a position where they find it hard to get things done. It could take a lot for them to get moving and when they do move, it could typically be because they have to.

For example, if they didn’t have to go to work, they could simply stay in bed, and if they were not hungry, they could stay sitting down. What is clear is that they won’t have much energy or drive.

Another Area

Along with this, if another person was to cross their boundaries and did something that wasn’t acceptable, they could simply tolerate it. They are then not going to stand their ground and speak up.

There is the chance that the other person won’t even be aware of what is going on for them due to how they come across. They could create the impression what has taken place hasn’t bothered them.

Totally Impotent

By being this way, it could be normal for them to feel very low and to be deeply depressed. Their life won’t be how they want it to be and they won’t feel as though they can do anything about it, so this is to be expected.

Instead of being at the centre of their own life and able to create a fulfilling life, they will be a spectator and have to put up with how their life is. Thanks to this, they could have moments when they think about ending it all.

Weighed Down

If they were to think about life, it could be seen as something that is a curse as opposed to a blessing. They could often hope that it will change and they will finally be able to live a life that is worth living.

So, although it can seem strange as to why they don’t get things moving, if taking action and getting things done is such a struggle, how else would they be? They won’t have anything holding them down or back but it will be as though they are under a collapsed building.

The Norm

There is the chance that they have been this way for as long as they can remember and thus believe that this is just who they are. But, if this is how they have been for as long as they can remember, this is to be expected.

It is then not just going to be an experience that they are having; it will be the only way for them to experience life. Nonetheless, regardless of how long they have been this way, it doesn’t mean that this is who they are.

A Natural Outcome

What this is likely to show is that they are carrying a lot of pain and this is why they don’t have much energy, struggle to get things moving, and feel powerless. They can be in a shut down, collapsed, frozen state, which will mean that their parasympathetic nervous system will generally be activated.

Their sympathetic nervous system, on the other hand, that will get them moving, will generally be deactivated. Both of these will serve a purpose but as they spend too much time in one, it will greatly undermine their ability to handle life, thrive and to experience a sense of personal power.

What’s going on?

At this point, it could seem strange as to why they would be carrying so much pain. If they were to hear this, they could also wonder why they would be carrying so much pain.

What this is likely to show is that their brain has blocked out what took place in order to protect them. As a result of this, they will be left with the impact of what happened but they won’t remember what happened, taking away their ability to join the dots, so to speak.

A Closer Look

At the beginning of their life, they may have often been left and when they were given attention, it may have largely been misattuned care. So, from the moment they were born, they would have missed out on the care that they needed to be able to grow and develop.

The pain of being left and not receiving the care that they needed would have been too much for their underdeveloped brian and nervous system to handle. Their only option, as they were powerless and totally dependent, was to automatically repress the pain they were in and to go into a shutdown, collapsed, frozen state.

A Purpose

This would have stopped them from being aware of the pain that they were in and their own needs. Ultimately, by going into this state, they would have been able to survive a brutal stage of their life.

Now that they are an adult and this stage is over, being this way will no longer be serving them. But, while this is the case, their body and brain won’t realise that this stage is over and as it will still see life in the same way, the need to stay in this shut down and helpless state will remain.

Awareness

If someone can relate to this and they are ready to change their life, they may need to reach out for external support. This is something that can be provided with the assistance of a therapist or healer.

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Oliver JR Cooper
http://www.oliverjrcooper.co.uk