While some people can keep things to themselves, there are others who are far more vocal when it comes to their life. It might then not matter what is taking place, as they will feel the need to tell other people.
Fortunately for them, they live in a time when this is probably easier than ever before to do. Through using social media, one will have a platform through which they can express themselves to the world.
There is then no need for them to keep anything to themselves, and this could fulfil a lot of their needs. It is then not just something they use from time to time; it is a big part of their life.
In The Middle
At the same time, there are going to be plenty of people who are happy to share certain parts of their life. They are then not going to be seen as show offs and are they not going to be seen as people who hold back either.
As a result of this, their page/s on social media is unlikely to reveal everything about them. Yet when they are around their close friends and family, for instance, they will soon open up.
During this time, one can talk about what they have done that day and/or over the weekend. This can then mean that they will be talking about the experiences they have had and they won’t mention anything else.
Their communication is then going to stay at one level and this could be due to a number of different reasons. Perhaps they are in an environment where it wouldn’t be right for them to take things to a deeper level.
If one was having a night out or if they were taking part in some kind of exercise class, it would be normal for them to keep everything light. As if they are out having a few drinks, they will probably have the need to relax.
Yet if they are exercising, they won’t want to focus on something that may cause them to lose their concentration. But there is a strong chance that their interactions with others won’t always go in this direction.
When it comes to the moments they share with someone when other people are not around, they may start off on the surface and then take things deeper. Or they could simply take things to a deeper level straight away.
If this was to happen, it could be a sign that one of them is going through challenging time or that something significant has occurred. Everything that is taking place in one’s life or the others life can then fade into the background.
One might be going through a breakup or they may have just been promoted, for instance, and this is then likely to mean that they will have a lot going on emotionally. There can then be what has taken place and how they feel about what has taken place.
And moments such as these are likely to be what enable them to feel a deeper connection to others. When they talk about their day-to-day life and other people do the same thing, it is not going to have the same effect.
A Common Theme
Along with these two elements, there are also likely to be things that one talks about on a regular basis. The same could also be said for the people who they spend time with, and this can relate to number of different things.
If one is passionate about something, it is to be expected that they will want to spend a lot of time talking about it. There could be a number of different things that interest them and so it won’t be necessary for one to talk about the same thing all the time.
One could also have a number of different things they like to say about themselves when they are in the company of others. For example, one could say that they won’t put up with people who are abusive, or tolerate intolerant people.
There may be times when they say that they don’t care about what others think, and this could even be a common expression. The people around them could then believe what they say, or they might have their doubts.
These people could wonder why they always say this if they don’t care about what other people think of them. It is then going to be the same as when someone says they are not attracted to someone and yet they constantly talk about them.
What this can show is that one is experiencing inner conflict, and in order to distance themselves from what is taking place within them, they need to do things to keep this part of them at bay. Thus, the reason one says they don’t need other peoples approval is so people will give them approval.
An Unconscious Process
This is not to say that one consciously realises what is taking place, as it is likely to take place just outside of their awareness. Through saying this, one is going to hope that people will go along with what they say, and if they do, this will give them the validation they need.
If this validation wasn’t available, there is the chance that they would end up getting in touch with the part of them that does need other people’s approval. Therefore, the reason one constantly repeats this statement is because the part of them that needs approval won’t simply disappear by receiving approval from others; the only thing it will do is cause this part of them to be repressed.
It then needs to be a daily or weekly occurrence, and the only way this will change is if they deal with the part of them that does need approval. There is the chance that their need for approval goes back to their childhood years.
If one can relate to this and they want to change, it might be necessary for them to work with a therapist.
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Oliver JR Cooper
Oliver JR Cooper
Author of 26 books, Transformational Writer, Teacher & Consultant.
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That which is contained within these articles is based on my own empirical understanding and is true for me at the time they were written. However, as I continue to grow, what I perceive as the truth will inevitably change and as a result of this - parts of these articles may not reflect my current outlook.