Projection: Is There A Reason Why We Project Our Issues Onto Others?

If one was to look back on their life, they may become aware of a time when they saw their own issue in someone else. This could have been a time when they accused someone of having anger problems, when they themselves were the ones who had anger problems.

Or, perhaps they accused their partner of acting in a selfish manner, when it was the person who they saw in the mirror who was acting in this way. At the time, it wouldn’t have been possible for them to see what was going on, but that would have changed as time passed.

The Most Important Thing

Nonetheless, even though this or something similar took place, the main thing is that one came to see what was going on. Consequently, one would have been able to do something about what was going on within them and to grow from the experience.

The alternative would have been for one to be oblivious to what was going on and to do the same thing all over again. Another way of looking at this would be to say that one shouldn’t have projected their issues onto another person to begin with.

A Completely Different Outlook

If one has this outlook, they are likely to believe that someone shouldn’t project their issues onto others. Instead, what they should do it take responsibility for what is taking place within them.

In their eyes, this is likely to be something that takes place when someone is not aware of what is taking place within them. And as they have this outlook, it should mean that they won’t ever project their issues onto others.

Back To Reality

However, as one is a human being, it means that there are going to be moments when they project their issues onto others. If they have done a certain amount of healing work and have a good level of self-awareness, this might not happen very often, but it is still likely to happen.

So, if one was to say that this is something that they don’t do, there is the chance that they are in denial. It is then going to vital for them to realise that there is nothing wrong with seeing their issues in others.

The Mirror

One way of looking at this would be to say that when one projects their issues onto others, it allows them to see what is going on within them. This is then another way for them to become aware of what they need to deal with.

With this in mind, one doesn’t need to criticise themselves for seeing what belongs to them in someone else. If anything, this should be a time when they should congratulate themselves for noticing what has taken place.

An Important Ability

If one wants to increase their self-awareness and to work through their stuff, they are going to need to be able to pay attention to what they judge in others. This will tell them a lot about the parts of themselves that they need to pay attention to.

There is then going to be no need for one to believe that they shouldn’t project their issues onto others. They will be able to see that they need to pay attention to what they see in others.

The Nature of the Mind

What this comes down to is that when one doesn’t want to face something, they can end up disconnecting from it. When this happens, one is not going to be able to directly face what they have lost touch with.

At one point in time they will have been aware of what this was and at other, they will be completely unaware of it. It probably would have been too painful for them to face it, which is why they had to push it out of their awareness.

A Helping Hand

Thus, if one didn’t project their issues onto others, it would be a lot harder for them to see what they have disconnected from. It would be like taking a car that doesn’t work to the garage and being told that they can’t find anything wrong with it.

Until something is found, it is not going to be possible for the car to be fixed. In the same way, it is only by one becoming aware of what is going on around them that they will be able to see what is going on within them and to change their life in the process.

Awareness

When someone builds houses for a living, there are going to be number of tools that allow them to get the job done, and the same could be said for someone who is working through their own issues.  One can use a journal to become aware of their thoughts and feelings, for instance, and they can pay attention to what they see in others.
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This is not to say that one has to work through their issues by themselves, though, as it may be necessary for them to reach out for external support from time to time. This can take place with the assistance of a therapist or a healer.

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Oliver JR Cooper
http://www.oliverjrcooper.co.uk