It could be said that there are certain things that are part of life, and this means that it is not possible to avoid them. Still, this is not to say that some people won’t try to make sure that they don’t experience something.
Rejection For example, there are going to be moments in everyone’s life when they are knocked back, and this will stop them from being able to take the next step. This is not going to be the end of the world though, as there is a strong chance that they will be able to find someone else or another opportunity. So, when one believes that this is just part of life, it is going to be a lot easier for them to fulfil their needs. The fact that some people won’t say yes to them is not going to be enough to stop them in their tracks. Looking Back If one was to look back on their life, they are likely to remember some of the moments when they were not accepted. But even though this took place, it wouldn’t have meant that they simply gave up. There may have been times when this had a negative effect on them, but it wouldn’t have kept them down for long. And through being able to get back on their feet, so to speak, it would have allowed them to fulfil their needs. Perspective This shows how much of an effect someone’s outlook has on how they behave; if they had a different outlook their behaviour would be different. One could believe that there are a number of reasons as to why another person wouldn’t say yes. Therefore, it is not that people reject them because there is something inherently wrong with them. For one thing, not everyone they come into contact with is going to want what they have to offer. A Different Approach One could also be aware of the fact that if someone does reject them, they may have only been responding to how they behaved in that moment. As a result of this, they can look into what they can do differently next time. Instead of feeling like a victim, one will know that there are certain things that they can do to experience life differently. It might take them a little while to change their behaviour, but at least they will realise that they have this option. Both Ways What could also play a part here is that one might realise that there are going to be moments when they are unable to accept someone. Consequently, other people are going to reject them and they are going to reject others. There is then going to be no reason for them to believe that this is something that only happens to them. Ultimately, one will see that this is just part of the human experience, and having this perspective will save them a lot of pain. The Ideal Experiencing life in this way it going to enable one to fulfil their needs, and this will allow them to achieve their goals. There will be the effect this has on their career and on their relationships. What this is likely to show is that one is emotionally strong; which is why being rejected by others is not something that has the tendency to overwhelm them. This could be how their life has been for as long as they can remember. A Different Reality There are then going to be other people who have a radically different experience, and this is likely to mean that it will be a lot harder for them to handle life. Due to how they feel when someone says no, they could do everything they can to avoid being rejected. For that reason, one might no longer even reach out to other people; or if they do, this could be something that rarely takes place. This is then going to have a negative effect on every area of their life. Reaching Out If they do feel the urge to reach out to another person, they could be in for a surprise. One could start talking to someone who they are attracted to or apply for a job, for instance, and they could receive a positive response. It might end up taking them a while to accept the fact that they haven’t been rejected; one might believe that their luck has changed. But even if this does take place, it will only be a matter of time before they end up having a different experience. Emotional Collapse When this does happen, one could find that they end up feeling completely different. If they are around other people, they may feel the need to hide; whereas if they are by themselves, they might just feel extremely low. What this can show is that one believes that their value is defined by how other people respond to them. The truth is that one’s value does not depend on whether other people accept them or not. A Closer Look When someone experiences life in this way it can be a sign that they experienced a lot of rejection when they were growing up. At this age, they wouldn’t have been able to see that the reason they were being rejected was due to the fact that their parents/s had issues. As a result, they would have come to believe that the reason this took place was because there was something inherently wrong with them. And through believing that they were the problem it would have caused them to believe that they could change their parent’s behaviour. Awareness However, as their parent/s behaviour had nothing to do with them, they wouldn’t have been able to do anything. It would have been too much for them to face the truth at this age, as this would have caused them to feel hopeless and as though there was nothing that they could do. If one can relate to this, and they want to change their life, it might be a good idea for them to reach out for external support. This can be provided by a therapist or a healer.
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Oliver JR Cooper http://www.oliverjrcooper.co.uk
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Oliver JR CooperAuthor of 28 books, Transformational Writer, Teacher & Consultant. Introductory Consultation
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Disclaimer
That which is contained within these articles is based on my own empirical understanding and is true for me at the time they were written. However, as I continue to grow, what I perceive as the truth will inevitably change and as a result of this - parts of these articles may not reflect my current outlook.
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