If one was to get in touch with someone they know it could be because they need something. However, it doesn’t mean that this will always be the case, as there could be times when they don’t need anything.
Curious During these moments, one may want to find out about what they have been doing, and this will show that they are interested in their life. It is then not going to matter if someone is doing something significant, as they will want to stay up to date. What this can then show is that one is happy to put their life to one side and to focus on someone else’s life. Through doing this, it will cause them to spend less time on their own life. It’s Worth It However, even though this is the case, it doesn’t mean that this will end up having a negative effect. The reason for this is that the effort one puts into another person’s life can end up making their life even more fulfilling. So while one will lose time and energy through doing this, it can also enable them to have people in their life who will add a lot of value. In this sense, one is losing something, but they are also gaining something. How This Happens When one gets in touch with someone, they could end up up going on social media, or they could send them a text. At the same time, one may decide to call them, or even to pay them a visit. If one approach doesn’t allow them to reach them, they could try another approach, and this would show that their interest in genuine. Still, if they don’t hear back from them straight away, they could end up waiting a while. Meaningful Relationships Through being this way when it comes to their friends, there is a strong chance that this is an area of their life that is highly rewarding. Through being there for these people, there is the chance that they will also be there for them. They will then have people in their life who can share the good times with and the not so good times. In fact, one may realise that if it wasn’t for the people in their life, it wouldn’t matter what they achieved. Balance One could be in a position where they are extremely successful, and they could see that their life wouldn’t be the same it wasn’t for their friends. But at the same time, they might also see that simply having good friends wouldn’t be enough either. It will then be important for them to have good people around them, and for them to have a sense of purpose. Both of these things are important, and it won’t be possible for one of them to replace the other. Both Ways And along with the effort one puts in, there will also be the effort that these people put in. One is then not going to put all the work in, however, as the people they are close to will also play their part. If this was something that didn’t take place, it would mean that their relationships are out of balance. This would then be an area of their life that is having a negative effect on them, and it would then be necessary for them to make a change. In The Middle Yet even if this is something that one can’t relate to, it doesn’t mean that they haven’t come into contact with people like this. When this occurs, one will see that no matter how interested they are in someone else’s life, they don’t return the favour. What this could show is that they are too caught up in their own life to have a relationship with anyone, or that they are not on the same page, so to speak. When this takes place, it is going to be in their best interest to walk away, and to invest their energy into a relationship that will enhance their life. Another Experience When one is able to reach out to others and it put their needs to one side, it is going to show that they are in balance. One on side, they will be able to give, and on the other side, they will be able to receive. During the moments when they are curious about someone else’s life, they will be giving, and when someone asks how they are, they will be receiving. However, one can also be in a position where they are only able to receive. One Reason This is not to say that one won’t put their life to one side and to find out about others; what it means is that this will be a way for them to get their needs met. One is then only going to be interested in another person’s life when they want something. Thus, if someone hears from them a few times a week or a few times a month, their intention is going to be the same. As a result of this, one could end up being deceived by them, and this is then going to set them up to be used. One Purpose When it comes to how one sees other people, they could believe that they are there to fulfil their needs. Other people are then not going to be seen as having their own needs and as being separate from them; they will be seen as being an extension of themselves. What this is likely to show is that is that one is caught up with their own needs, and they find it hard to empathise with others. And although this could cause one to have a lonely existence, there is the chance that it won’t. Disconnected The reason for this is that one might not even be in touch with their feelings, and this will then stop them from having to face the emotional consequences of their actions. One can then believe that there is nothing wrong with their behaviour. In fact, they could believe that other people are the same, and they are then going to be taking advantage of others instead of the other way around. But regardless of what is taking placing inside their mind, they are unlikely to have fulfilling relationships. Awareness If one can relate to this and they want to have relationships with others that are fulfilling, they may need to work with a therapist. There is the chance that their younger years were a time when they were taken advantage of by others.
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Oliver JR Cooper http://www.oliverjrcooper.co.uk
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Oliver JR CooperAuthor of 28 books, Transformational Writer, Teacher & Consultant. Introductory Consultation
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Disclaimer
That which is contained within these articles is based on my own empirical understanding and is true for me at the time they were written. However, as I continue to grow, what I perceive as the truth will inevitably change and as a result of this - parts of these articles may not reflect my current outlook.
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