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Relationships: Are Some People More Interested In What People Say Than What They Do?

8/1/2017

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It has been said that what people do is more important than what they say, and this going to come down to the fact that actions speak louder than words. As while it is easy for someone to say something, it is going to take a lot more effort for them to do something.
​
In The Beginning

However, when one meets someone for the first time, they could find that they end up getting caught up with what they say. They could believe that there is no reason for them to question what they tell them.

What this could show is that one is being taken in by what they are saying, and it could be as if they are under their spell. There is the chance that they won’t meet them again, and this is then going to be as far as it will go.

Moving On

It is then going to be irrelevant as to whether the other person was telling the truth or not, and one can carry on with their life. Even so, one could still think about what they spoke about.

On the other hand, if one was to see them again, it would give them the chance to see if what they were talking about matches up with who they are. At the same time, one could still go along with what they say.

Easy Target

Therefore, if the other person wanted to take advantage of them, it might not be too difficult for them to do so. Either consciously or unconsciously, they will know that one is only interested in what they say and not what they do.

For example, they could promise to do something for them, and one could be happy to give them something before this happens. One could then give them money or resources and the other person could decide to do a runner.

Milking the Cow

Alternatively, they could decide to take as much as they can, and to see how long they can get away with this for. While this happens, they could tell one that they will pay them back soon.

And if one continues to behave as they have done since the start, there will be no need for the other person to change their approach. What the person says will be what matters to them, as opposed to what they do.

A Matter of Time

Time will then continue to pass and one will continue to lose money and/or resources. Now, there could come a point in time when one is able to wake up and to see what is happening, and this could save them a lot of trouble.

Yet, there is also the chance that this won’t happen, and this could cause them to blame the other person. There is do doubting the part they have played, but if one had paid attention to their behaviour, their life would be different.

Another Scenario

If this is not something that takes place, one could find that they end up going along with what their partner says. Here, their partner could say that they love them and, at the same time, they could show very little, if any, interest in them.

Or, one could continue to get in touch with someone they are interested in even though nothing happens. What could cause them to keep putting the effort in is that the other person could tell them that they have just been busy, for instance.

Taken For a Ride

In the first example, one is going to be with someone who might no longer want to be with them. Through staying with them, they are going to be wasting their time, and this is going to stop them from being with someone who does want to be with them.

When it comes to the second example, one is going to be talking to someone who is not interested in meeting them. The time and effort they waste on them could then be used on someone who does want to take things further.

Stepping Back

During moments like these, it is going to be in one’s best interest to take a step back from what the other person says. Once they have done this, they can start to focus on the other person behaviour.

When this takes place, one may find that they start to experience pain, and this can show that they don’t want to face the reality of the situation. But the pain they will experience through doing this is not going to be as bad as the pain they will experience if they don’t face up to what is taking place.

Emotional Intelligence

What this shows is how important it is for one to make sure that they don’t allow themselves to be carried away with their emotions. This is not to say that one needs to be suspicious of everything that comes out of someone’s mouth; it just comes down to having a balanced approach.

If one finds that they have tendency to be taken for a ride, they could look into what they are looking for at an emotional level. Once they have taken care of these emotional needs, they may find that they are able to settle down and no longer get drawn into what people say.

Awareness

If one can relate to this and they want to change their life, they may need to seek external support. This will give them the chance to take a deeper look into why they are behaving in this way, and this is something that can take place with the assistance of a therapist.

​If you feel this has been of value, please leave a comment, like or get in touch. And feel free to share this article, as many others have.

Oliver JR Cooper
http://www.oliverjrcooper.co.uk/
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    Oliver JR Cooper

    Author of 28 books, Transformational Writer, Teacher & Consultant.


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    That which is contained within these articles is based on my own empirical understanding and is true for me at the time they were written. However, as I continue to grow, what I perceive as the truth will inevitably change and as a result of this - parts of these articles may not reflect my current outlook.





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