If one was to go into a new environment, they might be only too happy to talk to everyone they meet. This could mean that one is learning how to dance, or perhaps they have gone back into education.
As a result of this, it might not be long until they know everyone there, and this is going to make it easier for them to feel at ease. However, even if one isn’t in a new environment, it doesn’t mean that their behaviour will change.
A Way of Life
If one is in a position where they work with other people, this could be how they are when they are at work. Now, they might spend more time talking to certain people, but they are still going to reach out to everyone who crosses their path.
Yet if this doesn’t take place, it could be a sign that someone is not willing to talk to them, or perhaps one just doesn’t get on with them. It could be said that this is just part of life, as it is not going to be possible for one to get on with everyone.
Time Goes By
And once one has been learning how to dance for little while or on a course for the same amount of time, they could still behave in the same way. What will be different is that one will know more about these people.
There will be some people who they feel closer to and others who they only say a few words to. If one is on a course, for instance, they may find that certain people are not as friendly as they were in the beginning.
When they first started it might have been one group of people who didn’t know each other, but now it could be as if there are a number of different groups. In addition to the different groups, there could be people who are on their own, or they might only spend time with one person.
It is then similar to how someone can get in touch with people when they want something, but go silent when they don’t want anything. This is going to be something that one will need to accept and adapt to.
If one was to have this experience and they took it personally, it would end up having a negative effect on them. Instead of being able to see that this is just what happens, they will believe that they are doing something wrong.
Ultimately, their needs will have changed, and that’s partly why they are no longer as friendly as they were in the beginning. But if this is something that has a big effect on how they feel, it might be a good idea for them to look into why this is.
During this time, one can take the time to tune into how they feel in their body and what thoughts are going through their mind. For example, one could find that they feel angry and, as they dig deeper, they feel rejected.
Alternatively, they could find that they feel down and, if they are able to go deeper, they could feel worthless. This doesn’t mean that one will feel either rejected or worthless, as there could be a number of different feelings; what it means is that one feeling can end up consuming them.
What is taking place within them might be how they felt as a child, and this is going to stop them from being able to maintain their centre. How they felt as a child might have stayed in their body.
One’s physical appearance will have changed, but what is taking place within them will have stayed the same. It will then be important for them to heal the pain that is within them, and this can take place with the assistance of a therapist or a healer.
There are going to be others who are friendly in the beginning, and then their behaviour will change as time goes by. This is not to say that it will slightly alter, but that it will dramatically change.
When someone meets them for the first time, they could say they are outgoing, or at the very least, they could describe them as being approachable. And this could be how they come across for a number of weeks or even months.
A Big Difference
The people around them are going to have an idea of what they are like in their mind and, out of nowhere, they are going to change. This could mean that they will come across as aloof, or they might only talk to a few people.
What this is likely to show is that being friendly is not part of their nature; it is just how they behave when they are a new environment. So once they have found their feet, so to speak, they have no reason to behave in the same way.
If they were to tune into what is taking place within them when they are in a new environment, they could find that they feel uncomfortable. In fact, they could be consumed by anxiety.
Endearing themselves to others is what will allow them to regulate what is taking place within them. So although it might appear as though they are friendly, this is just a way for them to settle themselves down.
But while this will allow them to sooth themselves, it is going to cause them to push a lot of people away. If being friendly was who they are as opposed to an act, it would open a lot of doors for them.
Nevertheless, if one is not interested in people or if they are simply caught up in their own life, this is not going to concern them. If they are interested in changing their behaviour, they might need to reach out for external support.
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Oliver JR Cooper
Oliver JR Cooper
Author of 26 books, Transformational Writer, Teacher & Consultant.
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That which is contained within these articles is based on my own empirical understanding and is true for me at the time they were written. However, as I continue to grow, what I perceive as the truth will inevitably change and as a result of this - parts of these articles may not reflect my current outlook.