If someone was to come to the conclusion that they are in a relationship that is not very healthy, they could look into what they could do to change it. Through taking this approach, it will give them the chance to see if anything can be done.
There will most likely be what they will need to do and then, there will be the part that their partner needs to play. So, if they are both willing to do what needs to be done, it might only be a matter of time before this area of their life changes.
A Dead End
Then again, one may find that their partner says that they are willing to change, but that’s as far as it goes. This could be something that they will end up saying more than once, which will make it clear that they are all talk and no action.
At the same time, their partner could make out that their relationship is fine or they could say that they themselves are not the ones who need to change. Either way, it will be crystal clear that their relationship is not going to get any better; in fact, it is likely to get a lot worse.
One can then cut their ties with this person or they can continue to stay in a relationship that doesn’t serve them. If they move on, it will allow them to heal and to look into what they may need to do to find a more suitable match.
On the other hand, if they stay with this person, they will be undermining themselves. If they do stay with them, what they may find that they are no longer emotionally connected to them.
The emotional part of their being may have ended up shutting down in order to protect themselves from pain. To be in touch with how they felt may have been too painful, especially as their partner is no longer responding to their needs.
They can then live together but it can be as if they live a million miles away from each other. At this point, it will be a relationship that takes a lot from them and gives them very little in return.
For their own sanity, it will be essential for them to muster up the courage and to move on with their life. What will make this easier is if they reach out for the support of friends and family, for instance.
After all, one is not their own island; they are an interdependent human being. What can also help is for them to think about how much worse their life will be if they don’t break up with their partner.
A Slightly Different Scenario
Now, if one is in a dysfunctional relationship it will be bad enough, but it could be even worse if they are with someone who they have a really close bond with. What this could mean is that they are with someone who they have been with before.
However, this won’t be someone who they were with a few months or even a few years ago; it will be someone who they had a relationship with in a previous life. On one level, being with this person will be causing them all kinds of problems but, on another level, they can feel like they are supposed to be together.
A Strong Attachment
One may have tried to make their relationship better and their partner may have also tried, yet it won’t have taken the relationship down a different path. If one didn’t see this person as someone who they have a past life connection with, they may have left a long time ago.
Being with this person will be having a negative effect on their mental and emotional health, yet another part of them will be holding on. To this part of them, leaving this person could be seen as something that would cause their life to come to an end.
If one was to open up to someone else about what they are going through, they could end up being told that they are addicted to this person. And that what is holding them together is anything but love.
After hearing this, one could dismiss what this person has said, believing that they simply doesn’t understand. Alternatively, this could have a profound effect on them, making them realise how toxic their relationships actually is.
Back To Their Senses
If this does happen, one will be able to pay attention to what is happening now, not what happened in another life. Focusing on what is going on now, and allowing this to dictate how they behave, will be far better for their wellbeing than focusing on what happened a long time ago.
Or to be more accurate, it will be far better than focusing on what is happening in another life that is also happening now, as the past and even the future are all supposed to be taking place in the eternal now. Anyway, it will be their current life that they need to pay attention to and to allow this to govern their decisions.
If one can relate to this, and they can see that they are hooked on someone who is not a good match for them, they may need to reach out for external support. This is something that can be provided by the assistance of a therapist or a healer.
During this time, they may need to work through trauma that they experienced as a child as well as trauma that they experienced in another life.
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Oliver JR Cooper
Oliver JR Cooper
Author, Transformational Writer, Teacher & Consultant.
That which is contained within these articles is based on my own empirical understanding and is true for me at the time they were written. However, as I continue to grow, what I perceive as the truth will inevitably change and as a result of this - parts of these articles may not reflect my current outlook.