Relationships: Can Someone Put Up With Bad Behaviour When They Don't Value Themselves?

It could be said that the ideal will be for one to stand their ground when they meet someone, and not to put up with anything that will have a negative effect on them. Through being this way, they won’t allow another person to bring them down.
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Give And Take

Thus, when they do meet someone, they will only spend time with them if they treat them well. Being treated in this way is what they are going to feel comfortable with, and this could be how their life has been for as long as they can remember.

When they spend time with someone, they will add something to their life and one will return the favour. Each person is then going to be not only giving something, but they will also be receiving something.

At First

And, as this is what will feel right in the beginning, it is likely to be what will feel right as time passes. So, if one was to end up in a relationship with someone who treated them well in the beginning, it doesn’t mean that they will put up with bad behaviour as time goes by.

If the other person’s behaviour was to change, it could instantly stand out, and this could then be a time when they will speak up. This will allow them to deal with what is taking place, and if nothing happens, they could soon move on.

Confusion

When one experiences life in this way, it can be hard for them to comprehend why anyone would put up with bad behaviour. As far as they are concerned, they could believe that life is too short to spend time with people who are not right for them.

Or, they could think about how spending time with people like this is not going to be good for their wellbeing. Based on this, it is going to be only too clear how destructive it is to be around people like this.

Normal

If one does put up with bad behaviour, it can be something they have put up with for most of their life. It will then have a negative on effect on their life, but it can be seen as being part of life.

There will then be no reason for them to do anything, as they won’t believe that they can do anything about it. In order for their life to change, it will be vital for them to see their life differently.

Two Sides

When it comes to the kind of person that they want to be with, they could have a clear idea about what they will be like. Yet, even if this is the case, it is not going to match up with the kind of people they are drawn to.

One could meet someone for the first time, and even though there are signs that they won’t treat them well, they could just go along with it. The other person will then see that one puts up with bad behaviour.

Two Levels

This could be something that will stand out to them, and they could then see them as an easy target. Or, this might not be something they will think about consciously, but it will still have an effect on them nevertheless.

And if one does put up with this kind of behaviour, there will be no reason for the other person to change. There is a strong chance that the other person will be used to treating people in this way.

The Next Step

If they were to go to the next stage and end up in a relationship with them, their life is soon going to get even worse. They will have another person in their life who will undermine them.

The reason for this is that if they are attracted to people who are like this, they are likely to have friends who are the same. Now, one could leave this person, but they could soon find someone else who is just the same.

Change

If they do have friends that are different, they could tell them that they need to end the relationship. This could then be seen as a way of them to finally find someone who is right for them.

In fact, they might know someone who is right for them; with this person being seen as someone who will treat them well. The trouble is that even if one was to meet someone who was different; they might not be attracted to them.

A Deeper Look

When one puts up with bad behaviour, this is likely to be something that feels comfortable at a deeper level. It is then not going to be enough for them to simply change what is taking place externally.

If they were to get in touch with what is taking place within them, they may find that the reason they feel comfortable with this kind of behaviour is because they feel worthless. Through feeling so low, there is going to be no reason for them to do anything about how they experience life.

Awareness

Until one is able to feel different and changes how they see themselves, their life is unlikely to change. One could overlook what is taking place within them and look for someone who is different, but they will simply be wasting their time.

In order for them to change what is taking place within them, it might be a good idea for one to work with a therapist. 

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Oliver JR Cooper
http://www.oliverjrcooper.co.uk