If a man has the desire to in a relationship with a woman, he could end up taking action. This could then be a time when he will go out to different bars and clubs, and he could even join a few dating sites.
What this could show is that he has recently broken up with someone, and he now feels as though it is time to move on. At the same time, there is the chance that he has been single for quite some time.
Playing the Field
During this time, he may have only been interested in fulfilling his sexual needs, for instance. Therefore, through going out or by going online, he would have been able to meet women who also wanted the same thing.
And as there is less pressure on women to hide their sexual nature in today’s world, it could be said that it is easier than ever before for men to fulfil their sexual needs without needing to be in a relationship. This might have taken place for a number of months, or it may have lasted for a matter of years.
The Next Stage
But for one reason or another, behaving in this way is no longer going to give him the same satisfaction. What this could come down to is that he now wants to find someone to have children with.
So although he might have lowered his standards from time to time when he was fulfilling his sexual needs, he might no longer be willing to do so. He could have clear idea in mind and, unless he meets someone who matches up to this ideal, he might decide to stay single.
This could show that he is in a good place financially, and that his career is going in the right direction. There is the chance that this is his priority, and even if was to end up in a relationship, it is unlikely that this part of his life would be overlooked.
As a result of this, he won’t be looking for another person to complete him, and he will have plenty of value to offer a woman. Through being in this position, it could show that he feels comfortable with himself.
Therefore, he is not going to be someone who looks towards other people for approval. Said another way, he will value himself, and this will be why he is not willing to settle for someone who is not right for him.
If this wasn’t the case, he would probably believe that he doesn’t deserve to be with someone like this. And through having the need for approval, he would more than likely end up pushing people away.
What could also be said here is that he is not going to fear women, and this will have played a big part in how he has behaved throughout his life. As if he didn’t feel comfortable around them, his life wouldn’t be the same.
It would then be normal for him to keep them at a distance, and this would cause him to experience of frustration. Not only would it be a challenge for him to fulfil his sexual needs, it would also be challenge for him to find someone to be in a relationship with.
A Difference Experience
But while this man is not going to fear women, it doesn’t mean that every man on the planet is going to be this way. There are going to be plenty of men who don’t experience life in this way, and this is naturally going to have a big effect on their life.
When one can relate to this, they may find that they don’t allow themselves to get too close to women. But if they do, they could end up being overwhelmed with fear; with this being something that stops them from being able to function.
Loss of Control
When it comes to other areas of their life, they could be full of confidence, but when it comes to this area, they will disintegrate. They might not know what to say, and it could be as if their whole body freezes.
Or if this doesnt take place, they could feel the need to get away from them as fast as they can, and this is going to cause them to overlook the rest of their needs. And once they are no longer close to them, they could soon find that they begin to settle down and to return to how they felt before.
One is then going to have the need to connect with women, but due to how they feel when they get close to them, this rarely going to take place. They may find that it is only possible for them to talk to them when they are drunk, for instance.
Through being this way, one could believe that they lack courage, and they could see themselves as being weak. There is then going to be the pain they experience through not being able to get close to women, and the pain they experience through how they treat themselves.
If they were to talk to their friends about this, they could tell them that they need to ‘man up’, and that there is nothing for them to be afraid of. Alternatively, they could be told that they need to change what they belief, and to push themselves.
At the same time, one might prefer to keep how they feel to themselves, and this is because this is something they could feel ashamed of. As they are a man, they could believe that they are not supposed to experience fear.
A Deeper Look
If one was to change what they believe and ‘push themselves’, they may find that their life begins to change. On the other hand, this might not get them very far; in fact, one could end up feeling eve worse.
What this could then show is that the reason one doesn’t feel comfortable around women is due to what took place when they were younger. This may have been a time when their mother/caregiver abused them in some way.
A Lasting Impact
One is no longer a child and what took place is in the past, but the trauma they experienced when they were younger is still in their body. What they experienced as a child is then going to be triggered when they get close to women (or when they think about them).
When this takes place, their mind can find it hard to understand what is going on; whereas their body will know exactly what is happening. This is why it is often said that even though the mind forgets, the body always remembers.
In addition to what is taking place in their body, these early experiences may also have had an effect on their brain. As if they were abused while their brain was still developing, it may mean that it didn’t develop in the right way.
If one doesn’t feel comfortable around women and they want to change their life, they may need to work with a therapist.
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Oliver JR Cooper
Oliver JR Cooper
Teacher, Author, Transformational Writer & Coach - With Over 1,712,000 Article Views Online.
I also offer coaching via Skype and email. To find out more, click here.
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A Dialogue With The Heart - Part Two
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