When a relationship comes to an end, it can mean that two people are happy to be able to move on with their life. It could then be said that this was something that had run its course, and that there was no reason for them to stay together.
Now, this is not to say that one of them won’t feel sad about what has happened, and this could be something that both of them experience. Even so, they will know that it is for the best.
At the same time, this could be an experience that one of them has, and it is then not going to be possible for both of them to move on with their life. One person could feel as though this is something that has happened too soon.
In fact, they may have believed that they had met the right person to spend the rest of their life with. This can then cause one to not only feel deeply upset, but as though they have no control.
A Good Connection
If one was to think back to the moments they shared, they could start to remember all the good times they had. And not only can they have shared good moments together; they might have had a lot in common.
This could be a sign that they were together for a number of months, or it might have been a matter of years. The experiences they did have might have involved travelling to other countries.
Alternatively, this may have been a relationship that wasn’t very stable, and there could have been all kinds of problems. One might see that they have had moments when they didn’t speak for days or even weeks.
Their connection might not have been very strong, and it could have been as if they stayed together for the sake of it. And while they might have just had arguments, it could have meant that abuse occurred.
Therefore, if one was to reflect on their relationship, they might see that it is a good thing that it came to an end. It will be only too clear that they were with the wrong person and that this had to end.
But if they were to get it touch with how they feel, they are going to have radically different experience. At this level, it is going to seem as though this was the right person, and they might have the need to get back with them.
Based on what has taken place between them, this is not going to be the best thing for them to do. Intellectually, this will be only to clear to them, but if they end up being overpowered by their emotions it won’t matter.
They won’t be able to think clearly and this will then cause them to behave in ways that are not in their best interest. If they were to talk to a friend about what is taking place for them, it might stop them from doing something they will later regret.
Their friend can give them their advice and provide the clarity that they are unable to experience at this time. The reason they can do this is because they are not connected to what is taking place and so their emotions are not going to be out of control.
Yet while this can be seen as the ideal, it might not matter what their friend/s say. One could ignore what they say and allow their emotions to define how they behave.
One could end up trying to get in touch with their ex and to see if they can meet them in person. Another thing they could do is to go to where they live or work and to try to have a conversation with them.
This could be a time when they will be able to get through to them and to talk about how they feel, for instance. As a result of this, one could start to believe that there is the chance that they will get back together.
However, one could soon be told that this is not going to happen, and that it will be best for them to move on. It is then going to be down to them to deal with how they feel, as the other person is not going to be part of their life in the same way again.
From that point on, they may find that they don’t hear back from their ex again, and this could be hard for them to handle. And even if one wasn’t interested in getting back with their ex, they could still find that they no longer talk to them.
If one could talk to them, they may believe that it will be easier for them to come to terms with what has taken place. It is then not that they want things to go back to how they were; they just want them to stay in their life.
One way of looking at this would be to say that their ex is being selfish during this time and not thinking about one’s needs. After everything they have been through, it wouldn’t take a lot for them to be there from time to time.
Another way of looking at it would be to say that it is going to be perfectly normal for their ex to longer longer talk to them. If one treated this person badly, they are probably not going to want to be reminded of them.
Yet even if one didn’t treat them badly, they might want to move on with their life and start a new chapter, so to speak. And if they were to continue to talk to them, it would stop them from being able to do this.
Ultimately, their relationship with them will be over and it won’t be down to the other person to meet any of their needs. So, if one needs emotional support, it will be necessary for them to look towards a friend or even a therapist.
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Oliver JR Cooper
Oliver JR Cooper
Author of 26 books, Transformational Writer, Teacher & Consultant.
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That which is contained within these articles is based on my own empirical understanding and is true for me at the time they were written. However, as I continue to grow, what I perceive as the truth will inevitably change and as a result of this - parts of these articles may not reflect my current outlook.