If woman was to focus on an area of her life that is not working, she may begin to think about how she is unable to find a man who is available. This could be how her life has been for a short while, or it may have been this was for as long as she can remember.
There is Hope
When she can relate to the former, she may believe that her life will soon take a turn for the better. This could mean that she has been with a few men who haven’t been able to commit.
Furthermore, she could be at the beginning of her life, and it will then be normal for her to believe that things will change as time passes. So if the years continue to pass and her life doesn’t change, her outlook might soon begin to change.
The Same Position
How she will feel could be the same as how a woman might feel if she can relate to the latter. Her life will have been this way for a long time, and she will have a met a number of different men who were unable to commit.
This could show that this woman is not at the beginning of her life, and this could cause her to worry about if her life will always be this way. And if she doesn’t have children and she wants them, she might believe that she is not going to be able to fulfil this need.
If a woman was to look back on what these men were like when she met them, regardless of how long her life has been this way, she may find that there is a certain pattern that arises. So when she meets a man, he could come across as though he is ready to have a relationship.
It could be as if this is a need that he hasn’t been able to fulfil for a very long time, if ever, as he could come across really strong. In the same way that a rubber band will spring forward when it is released; he might propel himself towards her.
But even though he may come across in this was way at first, it might not have been long until his behaviour changed. At one point in time he would have been red hot and, as time passed, he would have turned into ice.
The interest would no longer have been there like it was before, or he might have completely disappeared. After having an experience like this, it may have caused her to think about if she had done something wrong.
During this time, she may have thought about if she came on too strong, and if it would be different if she had shown less interest. If this took place and she thought this was the case, she may have shown less interest the next time she met a man.
Even so, she may have found that changing her behaviour hasn’t had much of an effect on this area of her life. The thing it may have changed is that it causes her to attract men who show even more interest during the early stages.
There is also the chance that she has been with a least one man who was too close to his mother. This might not have stood out at first, but it may have become clear as the relationship developed.
It might then have been apparent that he only had time for one woman, and this would have stopped him from being able to open his heart to another woman. She might latter have come to see that this was a man who was enmeshed to his mother.
Just Out of Reach
Another occasion may come to mind when she met a man whilst on holiday, or a man who lived miles away from her. It may have felt as though she had met the one, but the distance was too much.
As a result, she may have experienced a lot of anger and spent a lot of time thinking about why he had to live so far away. Her ideal partner appeared, but he appeared in the wrong place, and even if he lived close, the relationship might have ended up going in the same direction as the others.
One way of looking at what this woman has experienced would be to say the she is just unlucky, and that there is nothing she can do. If her luck changes she will find the right person but, if it doesn’t, she won’t.
And through being let down over and over again, she could believe that all men are the same. If she feel powerless and without hope, it could be said that it is not going to be much of a surprise.
What she will find, if she thinks about every man she has been with, is that she is the common denominator. It is then going to be vital for her to look into why she would attract (and be attracted to) men who are unavailable.
At first, she may say that this has got nothing to do with her, and that she wants to meet a man who is ready to commit to her. However, is she was to observe this response and not to get caught up in it; she may gradually begin to find out why her life is this way.
A Deeper Look
Through getting in touch with what is taking place in her body, she may find that she fears getting close to a man. If this was to take place, she may feel as though she will end up being smothered, and that she will lose herself.
Along with this, she may believe that she doesn’t deserve to be with someone, and that she is unlovable. Also, she may feel as though she has to stay loyal to one of her caregivers, and that she would betray them if she has an intimate relationship.
When it comes to what is taking place within her, it can be the result of what took place when she was younger. This may have been a time when she didn’t receive the kind of care that she needed in order to develop in the right way, perhaps one of her caregivers got too close to her.
If a woman can relate to this and she wants to change her life, it might be a good idea for her to reach out for external support. This is something that can be provided by a therapist or a healer.
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Oliver JR Cooper
Oliver JR Cooper
Author of 26 books, Transformational Writer, Teacher & Consultant.
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That which is contained within these articles is based on my own empirical understanding and is true for me at the time they were written. However, as I continue to grow, what I perceive as the truth will inevitably change and as a result of this - parts of these articles may not reflect my current outlook.