Some people are sarcastic from time, while there are others who use sarcasm practically all of the time. What can define whether or not someone is described as being sarcastic can be how often they behave in this way.
At times, another person may find it amusing when one behaves in this way, but at other times, they could end up being taken aback. This could be because what one said offended them or it could show that this person just doesn’t appreciate this kind of behaviour. The Response If one was to say something sarcastic and another person ended up getting worked up, they could say that they are overreacting. As far as they are concerned, this person will need to lighten up. One may make it clear that they were not being mean; they were simply joking around with them. This might be enough to smooth things over or it might not have much of an effect. Conflict The ideal is then going to be for someone like this to spend time around people who have a similar sense of humour. These kinds of people might not always be happy with what one comes out with, but they may give as good as they get. However, even if one does surround themselves with people who are on the same wavelength as them, it doesn’t mean that they won’t spend time with people who are not. For example, their sense of humour could cause them to experience problems when they are at work or around certain family members. Up and Down If they are working for someone else and they are unable control this side of their personality, they may often be told to tone it down a bit or words to that effect. They may have even had a number of complaints. On the other hand, if they are a manger and this side is always on display, a few of the people they manage may have formed a negative view of them. These people may see them as someone who is unfriendly or unapproachable. A Few Examples Something bad could happen to them and one could say that that was exactly what they needed. In this case, what they have said will most likely make it easier for them to handle what has happened. Conversely, if another person was to do something and it didn’t turn out very well, they could say that they did a great job. The other person could end up feeling as though they have indirectly been put down. An Important Tool When someone uses sarcasm after they experience something negative, it will be a way for them to make light of what has happened to them. If they didn’t respond in this way, they could end up being overwhelmed by pain. Their mind will utilise this defence mechanism as a way to keep the pain at bay. Nonetheless, if they are reliant on this defence, it could mean that they don’t have a strong connection with their feelings. A Release If someone uses sarcasm when another person does something wrong or badly, for instance, it will be a way for them to make this clear without needing to make it clear. Along with this, saying something sarcastic can also allow them to let go of some of the anger that is within them. Maybe, they have a lot of anger within them and being sarcastic allows them to stop themselves from getting too angry. It might then be appropriate to say that their humour is hostility disguised as wit. Going Deeper Taking this into account, if one wasn’t so angry they might no longer need to spend as much time being sarcastic. The big question is why are they so angry? What has played a part in them being this way? In addition to the anger that is within them, they may also be carrying a fair amount of shame. Being sarcastic can then enable them to release some anger and it can allow them to feel better about themselves. Unaware If another person was to say that one is carrying a fair amount of anger and even shame, they might deny what they say. This could be the case or it may show is that one is not even aware of how they feel. Through being oblivious to the reasons why they spend so much time being sarcastic, it is going to be normal for them to dismiss what someone like this says. Perhaps they don’t feel strong enough to face their true feelings. A Closer Look There may have been a time in their adult life that left a big mark on their being or it could be the result of what took place during their early years. If it goes back to what happened when they were younger, they may have been violated in some way. This would have caused them to feel extremely angry and to be overwhelmed with shame. Going through this once would have been a lot for them to deal with, but to experience it on a regular basis would have been even harder. Awareness If one can relate to this, and they want to heal their inner wounds, they may need to reach out for external support. This is something that can take place with the assistance of a therapist or a healer.
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Oliver JR Cooper http://www.oliverjrcooper.co.uk
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Oliver JR CooperAuthor of 28 books, Transformational Writer, Teacher & Consultant. Introductory Consultation
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Disclaimer
That which is contained within these articles is based on my own empirical understanding and is true for me at the time they were written. However, as I continue to grow, what I perceive as the truth will inevitably change and as a result of this - parts of these articles may not reflect my current outlook.
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