When someone values themselves, they can do what it takes to achieve their goals. Quite simply, they are not going to be willing to settle in life, and this will be what pushes them forward.
As a result of this, they could be in a position where they have achieved a number of their goals. Alternatively, one might have only just started to value themselves, and this means that they might not have achieved much at this point in time.
Yet, regardless of what they have achieved so far, it is only going to be a matter of time before they are able to go to the next level. Now, this is not to say that everything will always go to plan.
There will be moments when they have setbacks, but that won’t cause them to give up. The main reason for this is that when something goes wrong, they probably won’t take it personally.
A Big Difference
This comes down to the fact that their value is going to be based on who they are, not on what they do. Therefore, when something goes wrong, it is not going mean that there is something wrong with them.
One will then be able to take a step back and to look into what they can do to move forward. Whereas if they took it personally when something didn’t go to plan, it would take them a while to get back on their feet again - that’s if they don’t give up altogether.
It has been said that a big part of success is having the ability to keep going, not matter happens. So, if one doesn’t have the tendency to throw the towel in, so to speak, when something doesn’t go to plan, it will be a lot easier for them to move through the challenges that arise.
And each time that they achieve something it will give them even more belief in their own ability to achieve their goals. If their friends or family were asked to describe them, they might say that they have high self-esteem.
A Popular Term
This is often seen as a key element when it comes to being successful, and America is perhaps the country that believes in this the most. With this in mind, someone is not going to get very far if they have low self-esteem.
When one doesn’t value themselves, then, they are not likely to get very far in life. If their life has only just begun, they might not believe that they will achieve a lot and, if they have been on this earth for quite some time, they might not have achieved much.
Just how It Is
If one was to come into contact with someone who is doing well in life, they might believe that they are different. This person is then going to have something that they don’t, which is why it is not possible for them to change their life.
Then again, one could be in touch with what is taking place at a deeper level, meaning they will be aware of the fact that they feel as though they don’t deserve to experience life differently. One could then be good at certain things, but they won’t allow themselves to take the next step.
When it comes to their career, for instance, they might hold themselves back. If an opportunity was to arise, they might not take it, or they could end up being overwhelmed with anxiety and end up underperforming.
Conversely, one might not be aware of what is taking place within them, and this could cause them to believe that other people want to hold them back. It is then going to be normal for them to have moments when they feel like a victim.
Black And White
If someone doesn’t value themselves, there is only going to be one outcome. Consequently, it is going to be relatively easy to realise when someone is in a position where they don’t feel good about themselves.
However, while it might seem as though this is the case, it is not always going to work this way. What can also happen is that one can end up doing everything they can to prove how competent they are.
One is then going to use the pain that is within them to drive them forward, and this could allow them to become extremely successful. Once they get to a certain level, other people could see them as an example to follow.
Thus, how they are treated by others is going to be radically different to how they see themselves. The down side is that no matter what they achieve, it won’t have much of an effect on them.
Their desire to achieve is going to be fuelled by their need to avoid how they feel, and this is why they are fighting a losing battle. After they have achieved something it may allow them to feel better, yet after a little while, their true feelings will probably come up to the surface again.
This could be something that they have experienced many times, but it doesn’t mean that they will be able to take a step back. In order for their life to change, they will need to let go of the pain that is within them.
When someone doesn’t value themselves, it can be due to what took place when they were younger. This may have been a time when they were abused and/or neglected by their caregiver/s.
If one can relate to this, and they want to change their life, it might be a good idea for them to reach out for external support. This can be provided by a therapist or a healer.
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Oliver JR Cooper
Oliver JR Cooper
Author of 26 books, Transformational Writer, Teacher & Consultant.
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That which is contained within these articles is based on my own empirical understanding and is true for me at the time they were written. However, as I continue to grow, what I perceive as the truth will inevitably change and as a result of this - parts of these articles may not reflect my current outlook.