On one hand, there is instant gratification and, on the other hand, there is delayed gratification. When it comes to the former, one way of looking at it would be to say that this is something that comes from the child part of them.
The reason for this is what when one was younger, they would have needed everything straight away. At this age, it wouldn’t have been possible for them to put their needs to one side.
A Time and A Place
At the same time, it could also be said that there is more to it than this, and this is because there are going to be moments when it will be necessary for this part of them to appear as an adult. In this sense, it might be more accurate to say that this drive that is not as important when they are older as it is when they are younger.
When it comes to when this drive is required, it can relate to when they are hungry or need to go to the toilet, for instance. It could then be said that this is something that often relates to their more basic needs.
The Other Option
Yet, when it comes to the latter, it could be said that this something that is a part of their adult self. There is the chance that they would have been brought up by people who exercised this drive whilst they were bringing them up.
During these years, their parent/s would have had to put certain needs to one side in order to fulfil their needs. If this took place, they might have thought about how it would affect their child if they ignored their needs and did what they wanted to do instead.
Yet, if they did do this and focused on their own needs, it could have set one up to be abandoned. Thus, out of their inability to see the bigger picture, they would have caused a lot of harm.
At this time, doing what they wanted might have felt good, but if they were able to step back, they would have realised that this would have a big effect on their own flesh and blood. It could be said that this emphasises how important it is to have a well-functioning brain.
When it comes to having this ability as an adult, it can allow them to achieve things that are significant. Ultimately, if one wants to have a fulfilling career, for instance, it is unlikely to happen overnight.
To get to this point, there is a strong chance that they will have to do things that won’t be very pleasurable, and this could happen for a number of years. And even if they were to get to this point, it doesn’t mean that it will be plain sailing.
Along with the effect this will have on their career, it will also have a positive effect on their connections with others. For example, if one wanted to be with someone, they are going to need to handle the moments when it doesn’t go how they want it to.
But through going through these moments, it can bring them closer to the other person, and it will be able to fulfil a lot of their needs. Having casual encounters can allow one to experience more pleasure, but they are unlikely to do much else.
In addition to this, if one wants to lose weight or gain muscle, it is not going to be something that happens straight away. And even if they do see a difference without too much time passing, it can take while for them to go to the next stage.
In the short-term, they are going to have to experience pain, and they will need to overlook other things that would be more pleasurable. Even so, it will be far more rewarding for them in the long-term.
A Bigger Impact
And, when one does achieve something like this, it will be far more meaningful than if they were to simply have something straight away. They will be only too aware of all the effort they have put in, and this will allow them to appreciate it more.
If one has what they want, when they want it, it is unlikely to mean anything to them. In the same way that human beings typically don’t think about how wonderful air is, as it is always there.
But while it is clear that having the ability to delay gratification is vital, it is something that is being undermined in today’s world. One way this takes place is that people have the ability to order something and have it delivered soon after.
Another way this occurs is through what takes place when one uses social media, and this is somewhere where one can have a number of their basic needs taken care of almost instantly. If, for example, one wants to receive attention, approval or to talk to someone, this can happen through using their device.
And through being able to get these needs met so easily, they can come to expect every other need to be met in the same way. When it comes to someone who has been brought up with social media, they could find that they have a greater need to experience life in this way that someone who hasn’t.
Having said that, this can all depend on how much time they spend online. As a result of this, one can be like a child that needs to have everything provided for them straight away, and they won’t be able to tolerate frustration.
There are going to be times when one can have their needs met instantly and times when they can’t. If one is unable to delay gratification, it can stop them from being able to live a fulfilling existence.
If one can relate to this and they want to change their life, it is going to be a good idea for them to develop the ability to delay gratification. There is plenty of information online on how this can be done.
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Oliver JR Cooper
Oliver JR Cooper
Author of 26 books, Transformational Writer, Teacher & Consultant.
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That which is contained within these articles is based on my own empirical understanding and is true for me at the time they were written. However, as I continue to grow, what I perceive as the truth will inevitably change and as a result of this - parts of these articles may not reflect my current outlook.