Success: Is It Harder For Someone To Achieve Something When They Are Only Doing It To Please Others?

When someone wants to achieve something, they can take action and more towards their goal. But if they don’t do this, it can mean that they will end up looking for information on how they can move forward.

As to whether one does the former or the latter can all depend on what it is that they want to achieve. At the same time, this might not have an effect on what approach they take.

Guidance

One could simply be in a position where they don’t feel comfortable taking action, and this then this is then going to mean that they need take their time. There is then the chance that they are more of a thinker than a doer, or they may just like to think things through.

Once they have a rough idea of what it is that they need to do, they could soon be on their way. This is then how they generally like to function and that’s all there is to it; there is no reason for them to change.
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A Different Approach

Yet if one can identify with the former, they might not have the patience to take a step back and to go over different information. The only thing on their mind could be to go forward, and this could mean they are more of a doer than a talker.

Even so, it might be necessary for them to restrain themselves and to take their time; especially if they don’t know what they are doing. If they don’t do this, they could end up wasting their time, or even causing harm.

Flexibility

What this shows is how important it is to be flexible, as this will make it easier for one to respond in a way that allows them to move forward.  Alternatively, if one can only respond in one way, it is likely to cause them problems.

It could be said that what defines if one is more likely to rush in or to hold back is a combination of a number of different factors. Their inborn temperament and the kind of nurturing they received during their early years will play a part.

Examples

If one wanted to become a martial arts expert, for instance, they wouldn’t need to spend much time looking into what they need to do. If they are not aware of where they can go to train, they would just need to find a club.

Yet if they wanted to become a nurse, it is not going to be possible for them to turn up at a hospital and to start assisting people. Before this happens, they will need to spend a number of years learning about things and having the right practical training.

The Engine

Nevertheless, through knowing what they want to do achieve, they will have something to aim for. And as they have this desire, it shows that they also have the drive to move forward.

If this wasn’t the case, there wouldn’t be much chance of their dreams becoming a reality, and this is because it would be nothing more than an idea in their mind. The fire within them is burning, so to speak, and this is a positive sign.

A Slight Dip

As they begin to take action and the months go by, they may find they are just as enthusiastic as they were in the beginning. It is then not going to be a challenge for them to stay on track.

Then again, one may find that they no longer feel like they did in the beginning and this could then cause them to think about if they want to carry on. What this could come down to is that they have got a long way to go, or it may mean that they have suffered a setback.

Stepping Back

However, if they were to take a step back and to reflect on why they are doing what they are doing, they may find that this starts to change. During this time, it will allow them to get in touch with their true needs.

What could also make a difference here is if they were to reach out for support, and this could be from their friends or from a coach, for instance. The feedback that they receive could allow them to settle down and to keep going.

Motivation

One way of looking at this would be to say that it is going to be normal for one to experience a dip in their energy from time to time. Not only that, it is not going to be necessary for one to be full of energy all the time in order to achieve something.

The important thing is that they are doing something that matters to them, and as a result of this they won’t always need to feel on top of the world. It can be as if they are doing what they came here to do, and that’s why they will keep going.

Another Experience

On the other hand, one may find that they can’t get back on track once they have experienced a setback, or when everything isn’t happening overnight. Or if they do get going again, they could soon end up in the same position.

It would then be easy to say that this is a sign that they lack self-discipline and that they need to work harder. There is the chance that this is true, but then again, there might be more to it.

Approval

What this can also show is that one only wants to achieve something in order to please other people, and this is then why they are unable to stay on track. The energy that keeps them going comes from without and not from within.

So unless other people give them the right responses, they are not going to have the energy they need. Ultimately, one will be completely dependent on other people when it comes to if they are able to achieve anything.

Awareness

If one can relate to this and they want to move forward, it will be important to let go of their need for approval and they may need to get in touch with their true needs. This can take place with the assistance of a therapist. 

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Oliver JR Cooper
http://www.oliverjrcooper.co.uk/