If someone were to step back and reflect on their life, what may stand out is that they often feel anxious and even fearful. Due to this, they are seldom going to be calm and at ease.
Still, they may find that if they do feel calm, it’s because they are around others and are not alone. At the same time, it might not matter if they are around others as they could still have the tendency to be all at sea.
A Tiring Existence
Naturally, experiencing life in his way is going to make it hard for them to live a fulfilling life. Instead of being able to freely express themselves, a big part of their life is likely to revolve around them doing what they can to feel more at ease.
As a result of this, they can have the inclination to please others and to stay in the background. They might also have a number of people in their life that are like parental figures.
Before long, they could talk to a friend or family member about what is going on for them, with this being a time when it is suggested that they seek professional assistance. Assuming that this is so, they could end up paying a visit to their doctor.
After talking about what is going on for them and perhaps has been going on for a very long time, they could be put on medication. And/or, they could end up working with a cognitive behavioural therapist.
If they don’t take medication but they do work with this type of therapist, they are likely to be told that what is taking place in their mind is the issue. Their ‘negative’ thoughts and beliefs will then be what are causing them to suffer.
For their life to change, then, what is going on in this part of their being will need to change. From this, it will be as if their mind is just playing up and needs to be fixed for them to experience life differently.
Therefore, their mind won’t be any different from an appliance that is malfunctioning due to a faulty part. But, although a new part will allow this appliance to work, new thoughts and beliefs will allow their mind to work properly.
After applying this approach for however long, they may find that they start to feel more at ease. Then again, this approach might only work for a short while or it might not work at all.
A Strange Scenario
If it only works for a short while or doesn’t work at all, they could end up wondering what is going on. But, as they will have changed what is taking place in their mind and this part of them is the issue, this is to be expected.
Nonetheless, what if what is taking place in their mind is nothing more than a symptom as opposed to the cause? This might be hard for them to accept if they have come to believe that their mind is the problem and something that needs to be ‘disciplined’.
The Tip Of The Iceberg
What they will need to keep in mind is that they don’t begin and end with their conscious mind or conscious sense of themselves. Along with this part of them, they also have an unconscious mind.
This other, hidden part of them is far bigger and more impactful than their conscious mind. Yet, even though this part of them is hidden, what is held in this part of them has an effect on their conscious mind.
With this in mind, as they struggle with anxiety and fear, it can show that, deep down, they fear that they are going to die. What is taking place for them at a conscious level is then a sign that something bad is about to happen.
With this understanding, the anxiety and fear that they are experiencing are going to make complete sense. Without this understanding, the anxiety and fear that they are experiencing are not going to make any sense.
What’s going on?
Nevertheless, they could wonder why they feel as if they are going to die. What this may show is that their early years were not very nurturing, with this being a time when they missed out on the love that they needed to grow and develop in the right way.
Throughout this stage of their life, they might have often been harmed and/or left. And, as they were powerless and totally dependent, they wouldn’t have been able to do anything about what was going on or to find another family.
The handle what was going on, their brain would have repressed how they felt and a number of their developmental needs. This would have caused them to gradually disconnect from their body and live in their head.
The years would have passed and their conscious mind would have forgotten about most if not all of what took place and how they felt but a big part of them won’t have moved on. Thanks to the pain that they are carrying and their unmet development needs, this part of them will believe that their life is about to end, not that it felt like it was going to end all those years ago.
If someone can relate to this and they are ready to change their life, they may need to reach out for external support. This is something that can be provided with the assistance of a therapist or healer.
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Oliver JR Cooper
Oliver JR Cooper
Author of 26 books, Transformational Writer, Teacher & Consultant.
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That which is contained within these articles is based on my own empirical understanding and is true for me at the time they were written. However, as I continue to grow, what I perceive as the truth will inevitably change and as a result of this - parts of these articles may not reflect my current outlook.